55yr old with Undiagnosed Bipolar for many years

Hi everyone, I'm new to this site and would like to introduce myself and give a brief potted history, with regard to advice which would be greatly appreciated. I am 55 years old and finished working as a Registered Nurse ( Mental Health ) 5 years ago due to my illness. I have suffered from mixed episodes for about 35 years but only really thought I may be Bipolar a couple of years ago. I guess I just tried to get on with the many Medical Professional's diagnoses ( Chronic depression). Looking back I've had a traumatic life. Brought up dis-attached to both my parents , mother was distant and aloof , father was a violent overt narcissist, who also had major mood swings . They split when I was about 4/5 yrs old.
Mainly brought up by my maternal grandmother, I have 3 half brothers. ( close to 1 of them who's in Australia ). I married at 17 to get away from my Mother. Had 2 children by 21. The depression and manic phases with extreme social anxiety had kicked in by then. I have had major periods of spending uncontrollably, risky behaviour , suicidal only on one rare occasion. Between age 25 and 34 I had a life threatening ectopic pregnancy with haemorrhaging and a burst fallopian tube, an emergency cholecystectomy due to perforated gall bladder and a couple of year later an abdominal hysterectomy. I think I may have had PTSD untreated after the ectopic and hysterectomy ( was given no counselling or advice about hormonal effects of full womb removal )
I have managed to work on and off in the medical profession, my last job being a Senior Nurse at Sister level for 7 years. I then developed another several chronic illnesses besides my mental health one and felt I couldn't carry on work, so took early retirement. My wonderful husband is my rock and I am close to my son and daughter although they don't really understand the mania/depression swings. My last Psychiatrist still insisted it was chronic depression and I remain on my nemesis of Sertraline 150mg ( having tried most of the anti-d's on the market over the years ) This time, I am not prepared to put up with these symptoms any more and have seen another GP for a referral to another Psychiatrist ( first I have to increase the sertraline to 200mg before he'll even refer me ) . I would be interested if anyone else has had trouble with getting a proper diagnosis. Not to blow my own trumpet, but I have a acquired a lot of knowledge about mental illness due to my work as a Nurse. Most of the time I have no insight to when I am going to have a period of mania or depression, fortunately my Husband is that used to the signs that he will gently point it out. Please can anyone help, I'm having a depressed episode currently which has lasted for about 10 days ( think it was prompted by a stressful situation recently ). I feel like I'm just going around in circles and although not suicidal, I fell quite desperate. Thanks for reading my overlong post !!

welcome to Psych Central ... please post if you feel it helpful ... you will find many here also with family stories and misdiganois tales ... remember we are not doctors but offer support only ... again welcome and I hope we can be helpful to you ... Tigger ...

I know there are a few people on here who didn't not get correctly diagnosed until much later in life. I am fortunately not one of them but it happens a lot, especially since a lot of people don't seek treatment while manic because it doesn't seem like a problem. I hope getting a second opinion will give you the answers you are looking for. Welcome to the boards!

Hi
I was one of those who got a diagnosis at age 43, been dealing with this new me for 10 years now and still haven't quite figured myself out yet
Don't give up on getting a correct diagnosis, it will mean a huge improvement once you are correctly treated, and don't be disheartened if it takes a few trials and errors to get to that correct treatment/medicine. As for me, I have had a lot of medicine changes over the years but that was to treat what ever mood was occurring at the time, sometimes what works to get me out of a mania is not the same thing that will get me out of depression.

Welcome! post as much as you need or want. We are here to help. Sounds like you have had a tough life but excelled despite it. You should be proud of yourself.

I wasn't diagnosed until age 37 after seeing many psychiatrists and therapist. It took him seeing me manic to make the diagnosis as previously my odd behaviour was all caught under the Complex PTSD and Borderline PD banner) Now I am told I don't have BPD but instead BP1. The diagnosis is secondary to correct treatment. Do you find anti-depressants work, or do they make you manic, irritable or agitated? Are you in therapy? That can be crucial to recovery and just making it through week to week. When do you see you pdoc next?

Sorry, so many Q's. Just hoping you can find the help you need and come to a place of peace.

Self-diagnosis is dangerous. As others have said, we're not doctors - we just play like we are. Let us know how the second opinion goes. It's interesting that your GP obviously sees you as depressed, insisting on upping the sertraline first before even being willing to make a second referral.

I was diagnosed with BP just short of 50 after almost 30 years of self destruction.

Look for the things that help you. The solution is part medication, part therapy, and part self care. I was just talking with my wife tonight about how "pissed" I am that I didn't discover hiking in my 20s.......30 years out the window! I hike almost every weekend and I absolutely love it. I come home exhausted and literally gimp up my driveway. I climb solo (a contentious issue in my family) and usually crank 6 hours or so but I find it unbelievably therapeutic. It gives me purpose - I have goal, I have something to plan, I can share it with my family, I see the grandeur of life, and I get some great exercise.

I have no friends but I don't care. I just do my thing. Consider what you might enjoy and if it would help. For me, it's a blend of peace and getting off the couch. Find your goal!

Welcome Ella

I was diagnosed BP in my mid thirties and changed to BP1 in my late thirties. I was diagnosed with and have various other diagnosis such as anxiety, social anxiety, PTSD and possibly schizoeffective but not sure about that for now nor do they seem overly concerned with slapping the diagnosis on me which is good.

Give your doctors time to figure it out but if you feel you are not getting proper treatment or have an incorrect diagnosis, see your doctor about it and ask questions. Good luck and welcome to PC.

Welcome to the forums.
bizi

Hey, thanks a lot for your support. I have been on lots of different of antidepressants over the past 20 odd years. None seem to control the depression or manic periods, which is why i'm so adamant that I have the wrong diagnosis of depression. Increased doses don't solve the problem either. I've had enough therapy to last three lifetimes . I consider myself quite a "together" person and I have a lot of insight and awareness of my own health. As I'm in the UK we have "free" healthcare on the NHS , but this often includes being unable to access it unless the Doctor really thinks you need it. Once he has sent in a referral to the chosen Medical Professional ( Psychiatrist etc..) you have to wait . I am seeing my GP this Thursday who wants to see how his prescribed increase of Setraline from 150 to 200mg has worked. It's made no difference as I predicted, having been in this scenario many times !! I will push to be referred yet again .

good luck ella!
bizi

Welcome to PC!

It sounds like you do have a lot of insight and are getting a handle on things.


WC

Hi,
I was like you diagnosed at age 56 and only started on lithium about a year ago. In retrospect I had all the signs of a mild bipolar turning increasingly severe as I aged. I was functioning (kind a) all my life but all the dumb things I have done can be written up for my illness.
I do not think being diagnosed late in life is a bad thing as medications may or may not work and depending on the pdoc can be a high stakes crap-shoot. Being on anti psychotic meds for 40 years in just not my cup of tea. My best wishes to you and I hope you get a good doctor and get better from now on...

Does the UK have a private system like we have here in Aus? I pay $150 a month and have most of my costs fully covered and it is much quicker than the public system. I hope you have access to a great psychiatrist soon. Keep posting on this or a new thred if you have q's or just need to chat. PM me anytime.