I'm going to die alone

I imagine with my sloppy record, no. I dont know if they can look into medical records or not but if they can, or get old police reports, I'm screwed.

I really want to do foster care and think my husband and I would be good ones once we get a little better. I don't think this will be possible with my history but my brother did it and he had rehabs, jail and a 51/50 so maybe it is possible?

I imagine adopting costs a lot of money to? That's another reason why I probably couldn't adopt, or have kids right now. I can barely afford cat food let alone diapers and formula. I'm in the process of trying to get SSI right now and money is tight. Veryyyy tight

Yes adoption costs a lot initially. It also costs a ton to care for another human being.....or in my case, four of them.

30 is a very significant age for that biological clock and questioning the direction of your life. You are going through a break up right now, adding to that. Plus your health issues.

Honestly, the break up is probably putting you on a better track. He wasn't healthy for you.

You are still very young and full of all possibilities.

I hear ya... I used to want kids too, but the more I think about it idk that id be able to handle them. not just that but there's a minimum of (I believe for one parent) 33% that the child would develop bp too, and that's not fair to put this on another human being just because I want kids.

At least you have a bf... I have nothing, I'm going to die ALONE.

I'm also questioning whether or not to have kids in the future, although my relationship is looking bad so I doubt anyone would be willing to have kids with me anyway. I'm 25 and people say I have so much time to find "the one". It doesn't feel like it.
I guess it's good to keep an open mind while also remaining realistic about your wishes and limitations.