[Struggling Lawyer]

One of the things I have struggled with is the idea I have BP. I know I have anxiety and depression issues (and readily acknowledge them) but I don't recognize (or perhaps refuse to see) the mania part of my behavior. For me, the mania always seem to be just a natural response to getting out of my depressive funk. My wife and others, however, see it as BP. I've not done anything too destructive, so I guess my question is as follows: at what point has the pendulum swung too far from depression to elation?

[still_crazy]

I think that really depends. Diagnosis is subjective, at best. The deal is that your life--job, school, family, whatever--should be kept running smoothly If things get out of hand and there have been incidents or close calls, you might want to consider some kind of treatment.

Speaking as a "patient," I'd be very careful about getting into treatment and very selective about what, if any, psych drugs you choose to take. Having said that, its always better to do things on an outpatient basis than deal with everything that goes with hospitalization.

[pirilin]

It's possible that your diagnosis will change. Mine has three times.

[Icare dixit]

The good thing about law is that it's about convincing people, not necessarily being right. BP is a natural fit.

The pendulum has swung too far when you need too much time to recover or you are too manic to be convincing (you're seen as crazy and wrong, not charismatic and right).

[Struggling Lawyer]

Actually, practicing law is probably the worst thing for me in terms of a career choice and my mental state. Alas, it is what it is and there's no escaping it at this point in my career/life.

[newtothis31]

I would describe it like a rubber band. Before I developed bipolar I, I would have mostly depression with very short bouts of feeling elated and it was like a burst- then it seemed to be elusive. But it was like a rubber band where I would just immediately snap back to being in a depressed state.

[mossanimal]

Originally Posted by Struggling Lawyer

Actually, practicing law is probably the worst thing for me in terms of a career choice and my mental state. Alas, it is what it is and there's no escaping it at this point in my career/life.

I'm always struggling with this. For me it comes down to.. Does my behavior lead to problems in my life? My 'manic' behavior leads to problems with my business because of all of my tangent projects that never get finished and seeking distractions down rabbit holes because I feel like they are connected to what I really do. So... I have financial problems. When I'm depressed and do nothing... I have financial problems. Financial problems lead to relationship problems. I feel like these things need to be fixed. During my hospitalization they kept telling me not to focus on the label.... more on the symptoms/problems. Accept treatment that deals with those. Not on the 'diagnosis'. Still.. I can't help but be obsessed with the diagnosis. I like having a label for the wreck I've caused in my life.

I'm also in the wrong field in many ways. Not so much the creative aspect (I'm a work-at-home craftsman/bladesmith) .. but the output. I need somebody to keep an eye on me. I'm the last person who should be working for themselves.