[boogiesmash]

Lately I've been on a rollercoaster ride. One day I am depressed, feeling sorry for myself, crying, then the very next day I kid you not, I have been in a great mood, bounced back, hopeful and at the gym. Then the next day back in depression. What gives? The only difference in meds I had was addition of gabapentin. I've had similar episodes like this but not as rapid and as lasting as it is now. I've been on this rollercoaster for about two weeks. I'm calling my pdoc tomorrow to try to get me in earlier. I posted in the childhood emotional neglect forum and someone mentioned I sound like I have borderline. Does borderline happen as frequent? Thought answers much appreciated.

[boogiesmash]

Oh I also want to add, I've been more irritable. I'd say since my last pdoc appointment (beginning of may) 75 % of the time I was irritable at my job, little things, morning people, etc.

[HALLIEBETH87]

Borderline moods can change with the wind. That's how it can be for me.

I am ultra-ultra rapid cycling. One therapist told me she had never seen anyone whose moods changed as quickly as mine. I've just analyzed the mood charts I've been keeping for many years. I was hoping to find some periods of time when the meds actually worked. (Well, I keep taking them because they have prevented the major, horrible depressions and wishing I were dead. I have not had that since about 1995. ) I looked at the charts as far back as 2003. There three, or maybe four periods of 6 months where I was stable. The meds always either quit working for me, or else gradually cause side effects till these new side effects have a major impact on my life, and the lives of other people. Lately there are two major side effect problems, probably caused by one or more of these meds: Lexapro, Lamictal, and Depakote. The problems are instantaneous and severe rages. I don't lash out except at home, but on the phone and out in public I am very irritable and can be rude. The after effects of the rages can make an underlying anger ruin my whole day, and I can't do anything. The other side effect is loss of balance on my feet/legs. I have had two very hard falls in the last 3 months. One was yesterday. Both times I fell full length and hit my head. I went to the ER and nothing was broke or any serious injury -- so far. Tomorrow I see my pdoc. I hope I can still ride public transit. The disability bus is ridiculous -- 1-2 hour wait in both directions!!! And not only that, it can be later or worse. I know because I knew two people who had to ride in it, and they'd sit around half the day waiting and trying to reach the switchboard to find out where it was.

[Sunflower123]

I'm sorry this is happening to you. Are you keeping your pdoc in the loop? Best wishes.

[luvyrself]

Originally Posted by boogiesmash

Oh I also want to add, I've been more irritable. I'd say since my last pdoc appointment (beginning of may) 75 % of the time I was irritable at my job, little things, morning people, etc.

-response. Wellbutrin seemed to make me extremely irritable. Its great for depression, but what a price to pay in my case. Im doing well on latuda for bp2.
Hugs!

[~Christina]

I'm going to toss out my opinion

Until someone finds baseline and is there at least a month these ups and downs are not rapid cycling, it's just being unwell.

[Unrigged64072835]

I have bordline. My moods are labile, which means they change often. It's more how not to react to the emotion when it's there. I took DBT for awhile and that seems to help. Mindfulness would help too.

[MissCathryn]

Me too! Me too! Me too!! Me too!!

The last week or 2. On and off. Sleepy then energized

Originally Posted by boogiesmash

Lately I've been on a rollercoaster ride. One day I am depressed, feeling sorry for myself, crying, then the very next day I kid you not, I have been in a great mood, bounced back, hopeful and at the gym. Then the next day back in depression. What gives? The only difference in meds I had was addition of gabapentin. I've had similar episodes like this but not as rapid and as lasting as it is now. I've been on this rollercoaster for about two weeks. I'm calling my pdoc tomorrow to try to get me in earlier. I posted in the childhood emotional neglect forum and someone mentioned I sound like I have borderline. Does borderline happen as frequent? Thought answers much appreciated.

[MissCathryn]

You are NOT alone. I am also scared. I think I have always been BPD, but who knows. All we can do is trust our docs, our pharmacists (I LOVE mine), and ourselves

[Unplugged]

Originally Posted by boogiesmash

Lately I've been on a rollercoaster ride. One day I am depressed, feeling sorry for myself, crying, then the very next day I kid you not, I have been in a great mood, bounced back, hopeful and at the gym. Then the next day back in depression. What gives? The only difference in meds I had was addition of gabapentin. I've had similar episodes like this but not as rapid and as lasting as it is now. I've been on this rollercoaster for about two weeks. I'm calling my pdoc tomorrow to try to get me in earlier. I posted in the childhood emotional neglect forum and someone mentioned I sound like I have borderline. Does borderline happen as frequent? Thought answers much appreciated.

I don't have an answer for you, (I know, no surprise), but maybe I can offer some info?
I'm bipolar rapid cycling, normal cycles are 4-6 in a week, but sometimes slow down to a more sane once per 7-10 days. I had a problem once where I was cycling more like a butterfly, multiple times in a day, it was really tough on those near me. I was also on a higher dose of Cipralex, a SSRI. My Pdoc figured it was the SSRI causing the problem and he was right. As the dosage was dropped my mood chart stopped looking like a richter scale machine. Maybe one of the meds you're on is playing a part?

[boogiesmash]

Originally Posted by Unplugged

I don't have an answer for you, (I know, no surprise), but maybe I can offer some info?
I'm bipolar rapid cycling, normal cycles are 4-6 in a week, but sometimes slow down to a more sane once per 7-10 days. I had a problem once where I was cycling more like a butterfly, multiple times in a day, it was really tough on those near me. I was also on a higher dose of Cipralex, a SSRI. My Pdoc figured it was the SSRI causing the problem and he was right. As the dosage was dropped my mood chart stopped looking like a richter scale machine. Maybe one of the meds you're on is playing a part?

Not sure. I had similar cycle like these just not as often. Still irritable.

[Icare dixit]

If you feel anxiety, depressed and insecure as a reaction to strong and irrational beliefs and you seem to deliberately make bad situation worse, you inflict damage/pain, you guarantee your failure, until the anxiety subsides, you might have a borderline personality. The anxiety is caused by irrational beliefs of inadequacy and its consequences. Sometimes you are extremely dependent. You value independence, freedom, no expectations.

If you can't think of any reason why your mood changes, even if it were to be irrational, it's BP.

Of course you can have both.

[Wander]

How long have you been on Pristiq and Wellbutrin? That load of anti-depressants may be causing some of your problems. Just a wild guess. How long have you been on them?

[boogiesmash]

Pristiq 6 months about. And Wellbutrin over a year.

[Wander]

Originally Posted by boogiesmash

Pristiq 6 months about. And Wellbutrin over a year.

Did you notice a change positive or negative once you started them?