the frustration

I'm getting a little frustrated with my lack of creativity.

It's not like I don't have ideas, mostly anyway. It's just I look at an empty page and feel like I'm about to have a panic attack. I need to go to therapy for my writing apparently.

I feel that my AP is ****ing my creativity over.

I'm so mad.

But I can't go off of it. That would end in disaster. And my husband told me he would leave me if I wasn't on an AP.

Anyway else have being creative problems caused from an AP?

Seriously you guys, I haven't written anything in an entire year!

Perhaps a different AP would have a better side effect profile?

I don't know, franz. My last pdoc, who I fired, took me off haldol cold turkey and three days afterwards I tried killing myself with a large kitchen knife, and now I'm on another stupid commitment.

So, I'm afraid to change AP's!

And it works really well.

It just has my creativity snowed over.

Im also afraid of what higher doses would do to me. Once I was forced to it and made my mind go all numb...

But instead of looking at the blank page, try finding inspiration just for the sake of inspiration... read, meditate, dream, scribble, do automatic writing, and just let the words come to you...

Always works for me that way...

I'm a creative. In the past I've used my creative side as a means to make a living. I would say that if your meds have you feeling stable then you should stick with them. I do struggle with constantly feeling like I've had my creativity or inspiration sucked out of me - this mostly happens when I'm at my most stable. When I am manic or hypo manic I have more ideas than I know what to do with and all the answers to the universe.

More to the point: I think what you are feeling is normal for any creative. Insofar as I have researched myself, it isn't easy to be creative and produce work constantly. If it was, then everyone would self publish amazing books - so on and so forth. Those who are really driven by their work force themselves to write everyday. It's not always a love fest.

I have had to learn, and in many ways am still learning, how to build up focus within myself to sit and type everyday or pick up a guitar again. Anyways, just my thoughts.

Have you tried talking long walks in nature? I carried a notebook with me cause that's where inspiration usually hit.

I have no creativity either. I used to write, draw, invent things - no more.

I also used to love meeting friends and doing things outside of the house - now I barely leave my bedroom.

I can sympathize.

I'm sorry you are having problems with your creativity but I'm glad you're stable and alive. That's the priority. You know, I've been wondering lately if my AP is causing my lack of motivation. Could an AP have a dampening effect on both? I sympathize as well. Best wishes.

I would give the new setup some time, at least a few months before judging its impact on creativity. I'm still spending too much time thinking about being non-symptomatic and being distracted by it; but I think its just the mind finding the experience pleasant and worth observing. But it breaks my confidence in my ability to create anything new and significant...

But now, a few months down the road, I need to kinda kick it in gear and move past just being free of notable symptoms. Time to start back on the path of creating new value, beyond just maintaining what I've built before.

My creativity comes and goes. It came back with Latuda, so I'm glad about that.

Maybe just write a page or two a day. Doesn't have to be sellable material, but keep the mind going. Just write a bunch of crap. Or go here and look at story prompts.

Thanks everyone for the responses!

I'll just have to do what I can. I think in about ten minutes I'm going to try writing again. Hopefully something happens!

This is pretty exciting. I just wrote a paragraph.