[Goals2017]

Hello everyone I'm new to this forum. I would like to discuss the bipolar condition. I was diagnosed back in 2013 BP 1 with psychotic features. I went off my meds and was fine up until 2016 right after I graduated college (psych degree) I had my second episode of mania in which landed me in jail, hospital, irts homes etc. I was out of society for 6 months. I had to move back in with my mom and been here since April. I have been feeling like a failure and that I can't amount to anything. I'm starting to lose hope in my future, and concerned that being bipolar will hold me back in life. I want a career, wife, family someday but I fear I'll fail and I even have suicidal ideations which torment me. I'm not suicidal anymore but I feel things will get worse and I'll end up dead because I can't handle life. Anyways just looking for positive feedback. What do you guys think I should do about working and my degree? I have a friend who's coaching me and has connections to the busniess world (city level job), but I don't have the confidence and belief that I can succeed under the stress or fear of getting fired or failing. I also got a call and have the opportunity to work at a group home but it only pays 11 and doesn't compensate for a college degree. Thanks guys for your support and feedback

[Woolly Bugger]

You certainly are going through a lot. Hang in there, it will get better. You are fortunate in that you have some supports in place. You should consider taking the job just to give yourself some structure and something to do. Take care.

[Sunflower123]

I'm sorry you are going through such a tough time. Are you back on meds? I agree with the previous poster about taking a job. It will give you structure and build your esteem. Best wishes.