[UpDownAround]

Experiencing my first bout of depression with my new med regimen; I had stayed slightly to moderately hypomanic for about 2 months and finally crashed last Friday. I am just moderately depressed most of the time and can do what needs done and hold up a facade so most people can't tell. But every now and then, a deeper depression seems to wash over me pretty suddenly and stay with me for a bit. It almost feels like I physically weigh more, my thoughts go dark and there are usually some tears involved. Then minutes to hours later the weight is lifted and the moderate depression returns. The facade falls apart when this happens, though I can usually manage to prop it up just long enough to escape social/business situations where a blank look and tears would out me (as being depressed, anyway).

My depression deepened more gradually in the past. Also, when I say I crashed on Friday, I can pin it down to the afternoon when I felt like I had just put on a lead overcoat; it was one of these waves. I was relieved when it lifted but disappointed to find it wasn't really gone, just moderated. Anyone else get these "waves"?

[wildflowerchild25]

That definitely happens to me. You are not alone. I'm sorry you're experiencing depression. It's terrible.

[Guiness187055]

I was having those waves but it was as I was climbing out of the abyss. I had them on the way down to the abyss also.

[Blackswan123]

Originally Posted by UpDownAround

Experiencing my first bout of depression with my new med regimen; I had stayed slightly to moderately hypomanic for about 2 months and finally crashed last Friday. I am just moderately depressed most of the time and can do what needs done and hold up a facade so most people can't tell. But every now and then, a deeper depression seems to wash over me pretty suddenly and stay with me for a bit. It almost feels like I physically weigh more, my thoughts go dark and there are usually some tears involved. Then minutes to hours later the weight is lifted and the moderate depression returns. The facade falls apart when this happens, though I can usually manage to prop it up just long enough to escape social/business situations where a blank look and tears would out me (as being depressed, anyway).

My depression deepened more gradually in the past. Also, when I say I crashed on Friday, I can pin it down to the afternoon when I felt like I had just put on a lead overcoat; it was one of these waves. I was relieved when it lifted but disappointed to find it wasn't really gone, just moderated. Anyone else get these "waves"?

Hi there!
I have lost my job and I am fresh graduate. There are two years I cannot find a job....I have applied everywhere in my town. My dream was to study abroad...I was good student..however after I lost my job I stay at home. I am tired of explaining people why I lost my job etc. Everybody is expecting me to find a job and to get marry. I have lost my hope. I try to find courage and motivation to do something. I do something and when the idea comes to me I am lost again. I talked to my mom but nothing helps...I understand you you are not alone.

[Blackswan123]

Originally Posted by Blackswan123

Hi there!
I have lost my job and I am fresh graduate. There are two years I cannot find a job....I have applied everywhere in my town. My dream was to study abroad...I was good student..however after I lost my job I stay at home. I am tired of explaining people why I lost my job etc. Everybody is expecting me to find a job and to get marry. I have lost my hope. I try to find courage and motivation to do something. I do something and when the idea comes to me I am lost again. I talked to my mom but nothing helps...I understand you you are not alone.

The bad thing is that I don't know how to help myself. I lost all my friends because I don't have money and I don't want to ask money from my parents. I am living inside my house and don't want to hang out. Nothing is interesting to me. I am afraid really....

[Fuzzybear]

[BiPolarJoe]

Originally Posted by UpDownAround

Experiencing my first bout of depression with my new med regimen; I had stayed slightly to moderately hypomanic for about 2 months and finally crashed last Friday. I am just moderately depressed most of the time and can do what needs done and hold up a facade so most people can't tell. But every now and then, a deeper depression seems to wash over me pretty suddenly and stay with me for a bit. It almost feels like I physically weigh more, my thoughts go dark and there are usually some tears involved. Then minutes to hours later the weight is lifted and the moderate depression returns. The facade falls apart when this happens, though I can usually manage to prop it up just long enough to escape social/business situations where a blank look and tears would out me (as being depressed, anyway).

My depression deepened more gradually in the past. Also, when I say I crashed on Friday, I can pin it down to the afternoon when I felt like I had just put on a lead overcoat; it was one of these waves. I was relieved when it lifted but disappointed to find it wasn't really gone, just moderated. Anyone else get these "waves"?

Yup, I can and do experience these "waves" as well. For me, they are a double edge sword. It's nice to get a mood lift out of the deep depressive dumps from time to time but bouncing between "kinda sorta bad" and awful is not a fun ride either.

[Sunflower123]

I go through these waves but the severe depression lasts the longest which stinks.

[UpDownAround]

It was just a different way of gradually deepening. It still isn't what I would call severe, but it is on the severe end of moderate if that makes any sense. Anyway, the "waves" kept lasting longer until it has become the steady state.

[Guiness187055]

Originally Posted by UpDownAround

It was just a different way of gradually deepening. It still isn't what I would call severe, but it is on the severe end of moderate if that makes any sense. Anyway, the "waves" kept lasting longer until it has become the steady state.

It might be time to talk to your doctor. I know once I get to a certain level of depression its hard for me to get out of it. It sounds like you may be slowly heading towards the abyss.

[UpDownAround]

Originally Posted by Guiness187055

It might be time to talk to your doctor. I know once I get to a certain level of depression its hard for me to get out of it. It sounds like you may be slowly heading towards the abyss.

I put a call in, but she won't be back in until Monday. There isn't a huge rush; I know the lay of the land in my abyss pretty well. I just tire of visiting it. I don't think I am spiraling down to really severe.

[UpDownAround]

Got my fingers crossed. Pins and needles all over my scalp and sometimes down my arms; feeling that twinge in my jaw/cheek area like I am about to get the grins. Tired, spacey and have a headache but don't feel quite so down all of a sudden. 6 days is short so I am trying not to get my hopes up too much but it sure feels like the winds of change blowing across my brain. We'll see what the morning brings.