I feel really lonely and sad.

The truth is that I don't have any friends IRL who I can talk to when I'm depressed. I also have really bad social anxiety, so I'm too scared to attend a support group even though I know that's what I should be doing.

I wish I had friends... I'm my own worst enemy.

[UpDownAround]

I'm no help. My wife isn't interested in talking about it. A couple of my kids are (one is an adult now, the other almost) as they also have some things to work through. But I don't have a local friend I can really talk to. Even my oldest good friend, who isn't local is not that great to talk to. He has been drinking and using too much for too long. So I feel your pain. I have my kids but don't want to burden them much. I try to do more listening than talking because that's my job in those relationships.

Curious: why don't you attend the support group if you think you should but are willing to meet people otherwise? What is it about support groups that keeps you from attending?

You like to ride bikes so perhaps you could find some biking group in your area on meetup.com? Finding people with the same hobbies and interests is a good place to meet people.

Did you have many friends in school? Have you no friends at all? (((Hugs)))

[CloserToTheMid]

My primary source of friends is church and AA. What kinds of things can you do given your anxiety? Which is worse, large group, small group, or one on one?

[Guiness187055]

I give people money and ask if they will be my friend.

[Carmina]

Sorry I wish I knew.

[Slightlydelusional]

I went to a meeting tonight and so happy I did. The people are so nice and broken just like me, but want to get better.

I have social anxiety but just try to push through, its rough at times, but found the pay-off is well worth it.

Originally Posted by Carmina

Sorry I wish I knew.

same.

99 percent of my friends are on here, and the ohnly one that isn't is tara, who I met on a trivia website- and is in america anyway.

I think the 3 things that hold me back are...

1. i'm agoraphobic and can't go out to meet people

2. again because of my agoraphobia, my life is pretty boring and I barely have many shared experiences with anyone

and 3. I refuse to make friends with anyone who's not got a mental health issue

okay, that maybe sounds bad.. like all people without mental health issues are these monster people who just walk away from you as soon as they find out you have an illness (I know that's not true, I know their are people), or rather, heard their are people that do accept you as you are

but with me, it's obvious... I don't even have to tell them

I guess my shyness too.

starting a conversation... meow, or boing, hardly a topic to discuss

just a nudge for the other person to talk

[UpDownAround]

Sometimes I wish my social awkwardness was being quiet or shy. I start conversations with nothing to say and I am bad about crossing boundaries and saying things or asking questions that are considered rude or inappropriate. I have friends and family that are in the LGBT community and they tell me I am one of the worst allies ever because of what comes out of my mouth sometimes - asking questions that shouldn't be asked directly, joking about things they take seriously or making assumptions that are incorrect. The filter between my brain and mouth doesn't work very well and some odd observations and over the line humor often comes into my head. I am not trying to think up stuff like that; the thoughts just show up unannounced. Unfortunately they often get announced...

[fishin fool]

The friends that I grew up with are now all over the country so even though we speak
now and then we are hardly the friends we once were. I have a few other friends but I wouldn't consider them close friends. I stay social by belonging to two fishing clubs
which I enjoy for the most part. I go to group therapy as often as I can because it
always helps to know you are not alone in your struggles.
I hope this helps in some way.

[Sunflower123]

My primary source of friends is through my church and through the ymca where I work out. I also have my family. I have social anxiety so it was difficult to make friends but I persisted.

Interestingly, I am closer to some of the folks on here and I've only been active since April then I am to my irl friends of many years.

[UpDownAround]

Originally Posted by Jennifer 1967

My primary source of friends is through my church and through the ymca where I work out. I also have my family. I have social anxiety so it was difficult to make friends but I persisted.

Interestingly, I am closer to some of the folks on here and I've only been active since April then I am to my irl friends of many years.

I do better in forums for a couple of reasons. First is the reasonable expectation of anonymity. It allows me to be very open about everything including some topics I am hesitant to share with anyone who knows me. The second is that I have time to look over what I am saying before I press the button. I can even edit after posting. I can't blurt something out before I realize what I am saying. In this particular forum there is the additional aspect of knowing people share my perspective to some degree; no stigma about BP.

[~Christina]

I had lots of " friends" when I was working. We drifted apart when I wasn't able to work, total suckage!

I really have no one irl, and that really hurts me.

There are really no meetups in my area unless I want to drive over an hour away , and financially it's a no go.

I wish I had some stellar advice and friends of my own irl

(((( hugs ))))

[Carmina]

Originally Posted by shattered sanity

I guess my shyness too.

starting a conversation... meow, or boing, hardly a topic to discuss

just a nudge for the other person to talk

Yeah, shyness is just ****ing crippling. I met the most beautiful woman I have even come into contact with last week (she taught our yoga group - stood in for the usual leader) - an absolute goddess in every sense, really she was like on another plane of existence. Straight away my self loathing and shyness started kicking in - 'how could I possibly talk to her', 'how could she possibly have any interest in me', 'if I say anything personal she'll think I'm just a creep', 'she must be in another league and have lots of interest from guys, how can I possibly compete?' and so on. I wouldn't have known what to say to her anyway. Completely shut myself down and now I am majorly kicking my own *** for doing that, but I do it everytime. I don't go out at all socially as in to pubs/clubs etc and am very social phobic in that sense although I am able to go out for specific activities like yoga or a walking group (or to work).