Need suggestions, Input or something

I have type 2 Bipolar disorder and need some advice suggestions or some type of input from someone. I am currently not taking medication due to me being out of work and having no income right now.

To keep a long story short 2 years I started on a journey to make my own video game. I am about 2 - 4 weeks away from release of the game, and I am exhausted. My symptoms have been in and out for the last couple years due to lack of stress. I have been able to control it for the most part. I do have occasional outbursts, spurts of pure rage, seeing and hearing things that are not there. I have been in a mix state for prob. the last couple weeks.

This is my question though, the closer I get to release the more present my symptoms become due to the stress. It feels like it did back when I worked for others. I feel sometimes like i'm losing touch with my reality but I keep pushing forward. I can’t quit now, I will not quit now. I have built something great here not just the game but the people I have met and the followers of the game. I have built a community around a single purpose all by myself. This is probably my greatest achievement out of all this. I built relationships with others, complete strangers. Within the next 4 weeks my symptoms are bound to explode. I can control it for the most part but if feels like i’m dying on the inside. What should I do? I don’t want to take time off of the game for this. This is where I need some type of suggestion or advice or something. Thank you for your time and I look forward to hearing anything lol.

P.S. I do not have a support team, my mother does not understand bipolar and gets weirded out when I talk about it. The rest of my family we do not speak to each other. As for friends, I do not wish to burden them with this, so in all respects I am all alone, and have been for quite a long time. Which could be another reason on why I’m so exhausted. I’m just tired, worn out and have no one else to turn to except complete strangers (No Offense).

Hello. Welcome to PC. Congratulations on the upcoming release of your computer game. Can you take just one or two days off to get some rest? Hopefully others here will have some good advice.

Welcome to PC do you take meds?

Try and do self care. Its great your game is going to be released thats fantastic ...

But self care is a must esp if you have no way to afford help.

Welcome to PC

There are ways to get meds without paying much or anything. Some meds are $4 at Walmart and other pharmacies. You can find the cheapest prices on meds locally at www.goodrx.com

There is also patient assistance for name brand meds. You just apply and show you have low/no income and no insurance and they send the meds. Even if you don't 100% qualify you can ask for an exemption. My experience has been that they always grant them.

Rx Outreach | Patient Assistance Program, Discount Prescription Drugs is another place to check. They have generics really cheap. When I was uninsured I got a lot of meds from them.

I agree with the suggestions re: rest and self-care.
Keep a routine every day. Same hours of sleep, etc.

Maybe keep checking in here, where you'll find some support, especially for the next few more stressful weeks?


WC

Congrats on creating something so awesome.

I think the advice about taking a few days off is great. The creation will be going nowhere and by slowing things down u will be more prepared when it launches and have a new phase and challenges to work with.

Good luck!

yeah at my pharmacy you can get lamotrigine without even using the insurance for about $10/30 days supply.

also, exercise and sleep!