[bewise93]

Through suicide attempts, hospitalizations, panic attacks, etc, I'm on alot of meds. It was okay when they were working, but now I just want to stop taking them. I've only been on lithium a couple weeks, and I know I need to give it more time, but there's a part of me that wants to be done with meds. The remeron works for 6 months, then poops out every time. It did this to me 2 years ago too. The zoloft doesn't do much. The lamictal might be too low a dose. I just feel like constantly having medication adjustments is such a hassle. I miss the old me, 4 months ago, that went biking every day and loved to read. Where are you, old self? I don't feel depressed in a crying sense. I don't actually feel that depressed, just lethargic. Then they will want to give me a stimulant and that will give me psychosis. It does every time. I would rather be depressed and functional than have this low grade depression with alot of lethargy and cognitive issues from lithium. I guess I don't know what else to say, I'm fed up.

I got to a point where I was on 7 psychiatric medications, plus 1 "as needed". Eventually I got to a point where I wasn't getting manic, and wasn't EXACTLY depressed, but it was too much. I would never have gone off all of them. For one thing, going off meds too fast can cause some downright evil withdrawals. It can also bring on an episode like you've never seen before. That's what happened to me when I went off meds cold turkey twice. Of course I ended up hospitalized for both experiments, but also my illness itself worsened.

It's easy to just think that "I'm not doing great on them, I'll be back to my old wonderful self off them", but that's often just some kind of dream. If it does work like that all the best to you. It sort of worked like that for a bit for my nephew. Then his depression came back with a vengeance and he ended up killing himself at only 24 years old before his medication doses could be brought to therapeutic level again. It's true that before he went off his meds cold turkey he was not in a good situation, but I certainly think a major med change would have been better than the shock to his system. So, he had a reprieve? Was it worth it for him?

I'm now on 4 psych meds plus 1 "as needed". Slowly but surely meds were discontinued. I'll admit that two were only discontinued because of severe side effects. It's a shame it had to come to that in order for them to be removed. But my pdoc took me off of them slowly. Actually, as my one med dose went down down down my life improved. The other wasn't as easy, but adjustments really helped. I'm still not the person I was at 28 years old. Hopefully I'll get a taste of "her" someday again, but I won't make a deal with the devil to do it.

[blue_eyed_siamese]

Going through constant med adjustments sucks, but from my own personal experience, it really is worth it when you find a combination that works for you. Don't give up! And don't shame yourself about the amount of meds you are on!

[Wild Coyote]

I hear you. I have been going through very frequent med adjustments for well over a year now. I am living with med changes/adjustments more often than not. It gets old fast.

I am sorry you have been going through this, too.

I hope you can give lithium a bit longer. Please let your pdoc/therapist know about your frustrations with meds.

Take care of yourself.

WC

[~Christina]

You are on alot of medications it happens things get layered on top of layer. Many people can wind up on to many medications.

You need a sit down with your Pdoc and discuss each medications and do a pro/con for each.

I hope your feeling better soon.