[xRavenx]

How can you tell whether staying to yourself is unhealthy or not? Is there a certain amount of time that must pass by, before it can truly be considered isolation, rather than just being by yourself? Is it healthy to want to be alone for a period of time and not really go out of the way to socialize?

I am just trying to get a feel for what is healthy vs. not so healthy when it comes to spending most of the time alone. Like, determining whether it's depression and a "symptom," or more just a form of self-care, before being ready to dive in to more activities. If you have any ideas on how to distinguish between this, please post.

I am not referring to never leaving the house or being cut off from any interaction at all, but more so staying to yourself more often than before, since that is all you feel ready for at this time in life, compared to maybe another time previously where you were a little more social.

I'd really like any input. Thanks!

[Pookyl]

For me the difference is the length of time I feel like that. So for me, I can only let myself totally withdraw for a day. I love my own space so I do partially withdraw for part of most days but only after getting up and about to do something.
if I let myself withdraw for longer it looks like this:
Day 1 - feel a bit blah
Day 2 - depressed
Day 3 - mixed (hypo and Sui)
You may be able to withdraw for much longer. Unfortunately, I flip between moods very easily.

[Nammu]

That's a wonderful question. I like my alone time and can be alone for weeks without it being a problem....its other people who think it's unhealthy. But is it or is it just me being me? I feel lonely in a crowd but not when I'm alone so who's to say if it's bad that I'm alone for long periods of time? Yet when you look at symptoms of depression isolation is mentioned and most people have different ideas of what is too much alone time.

[Sunflower123]

I could be alone for weeks and be content. I do figure that socializing is an important part of my recovery so I make myself socialize doing activities I enjoy. If I go for more then two weeks not socializing, I start to work my way back into it.

[emgreen]

That's a great question I've never thought to ask myself. I can go weeks (months sometimes) without dealing with people. Sometimes it's unhealthy (like when it gets to be borderline agoraphobic), but at other times I just enjoy the lack of anxiety & "chill" of time alone. It's a really thin line now that I think of it. I think picking up on my feelings of depression & anxiety are a big part of it. I'm one of those people who has a problem identifying what I'm feeling - I tend to go with the flow. That's why I have a therapist...But there are times when I shut her out, too. That's a real "chicken-egg" question you've got there.

[xRavenx]

Originally Posted by emgreen

That's a great question I've never thought to ask myself. I can go weeks (months sometimes) without dealing with people. Sometimes it's unhealthy (like when it gets to be borderline agoraphobic), but at other times I just enjoy the lack of anxiety & "chill" of time alone. It's a really thin line now that I think of it. I think picking up on my feelings of depression & anxiety are a big part of it. I'm one of those people who has a problem identifying what I'm feeling - I tend to go with the flow. That's why I have a therapist...But there are times when I shut her out, too. That's a real "chicken-egg" question you've got there.

Yes, exactly! I also tend to go with the flow. Sometimes I feel my isolation is stepping over to the unhealthy side, but other times I feel it's important to give myself some breathing space, before I can truly be "there" for people who need me, so it's a form of taking a little break from too many obligations and commitments socially. Plus, my job is demanding, so I need every minute to myself that I can possibly take.

Depression does often play a role for me though. I don't find as much joy or motivation in making plans with others, compared to previously. I do the occasional lunch though. I took a break from dating or those type of websites. It's way too much to me, and I don't feel like facing the unfamiliar socially. While I can acknowledge that some of my isolation certainly has to do with depression, I have certain responsibilities that I feel I need to handle at this time. I still talk on the phone here and there and have a few relatives, who I interact with regularly, but I used to be more social and connected to friends and plans. Maybe it's too overwhelming at this time, but it's okay to withdraw a little bit, until I'm ready. Everyone else is out there dealing with a lot of their own responsibilities any way, since we are all adults, so there isn't a ton of pressure to be a certain way to begin with.

I think a little time is what I need. The weather isn't even going to be great these next few months anyway. I get scared that life is going to pass me by, but I do have some medical things that need to be squared away first as well as working through anxiety and depression. Like I said, I can't really be there for anyone else, before I take care of my own needs.

[UpDownAround]

To me it is pretty simple - there is "not seeking out others" and "avoiding others". I do both but usually just the former, which I think is the healthier "want to be alone" mode.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by UpDownAround

To me it is pretty simple - there is "not seeking out others" and "avoiding others". I do both but usually just the former, which I think is the healthier "want to be alone" mode.

This makes a lot of sense to me.
I also do both. I can do both just by staying home, since I am disabled.
I am primarily an introvert. I do enjoy people though and can appear extroverted in social situations.


WC

[still_crazy]

hi. a lot of 'mental health' treatment and diagnosis is really about values and control. im not antipsychiatry, just stating what i've observed and experienced.

personally, im somewhat...reclusive, by nature. i once had huge social anxiety, now i don't. i just...need time alone, to reflect and recharge. i push myself to contact people, get out there, etc. when i find the alone time is pushing my focus too far inward, and when...for lack of a better way of putting it...i start feeling and act more on edge around people, a lil..."crazy," LOL.

each person is different, of course. there's also one's obligations to consider. i -can- be reclusive, in my situation. if i had a family to take care of, a high pressure job, etc...that'd be different (and I'd probably be on a lot more psych drugs, lol).

hope this helps.

[xRavenx]

Originally Posted by still_crazy

hi. a lot of 'mental health' treatment and diagnosis is really about values and control. im not antipsychiatry, just stating what i've observed and experienced.

personally, im somewhat...reclusive, by nature. i once had huge social anxiety, now i don't. i just...need time alone, to reflect and recharge. i push myself to contact people, get out there, etc. when i find the alone time is pushing my focus too far inward, and when...for lack of a better way of putting it...i start feeling and act more on edge around people, a lil..."crazy," LOL.

each person is different, of course. there's also one's obligations to consider. i -can- be reclusive, in my situation. if i had a family to take care of, a high pressure job, etc...that'd be different (and I'd probably be on a lot more psych drugs, lol).

hope this helps.

This really does help and makes a lot of sense! "Reflect and recharge" really stood out for me. That's something I need often. I have an overwhelming lifestyle as far as work goes, where every free minute of my day is important, where I need to unwind. That often means spending time alone, since it is tiring.

[~Christina]

Personally I NEED my alone time If I dont get enough , which varies greatly depending on where I am Bipolar wise I get agitated and angry etc ...

Last time I really checked out for 6 weeks I agreed to go IP

[still_crazy]

how are things now?