[dshantel]

It's been awhile seen I've posted. I'm pretty depressed right now. My head is not in a good place at all. There's been a lot going on recently and I've come to the point of seriously wishing that I didn't exist. Sometimes I don't know if I'm safe. Everywhere I see people saying that you should do whatever makes you happy or that you should just be yourself but it's not that easy. How can you be yourself when so much is at stake? If being yourself completed dismantles your whole life? I can't love myself and I can't accept myself. I just wish I wasn't me. Why am I even here. I don't understand the point. All I do is hurt people all the time. Everyone says that I'll get through it and that I'll find happiness again. I don't believe it and if I did, I just know this will all come back. I've felt this way before. I just hate who I am so much. I just needed to vent.

Originally Posted by dshantel

It's been awhile seen I've posted. I'm pretty depressed right now. My head is not in a good place at all. There's been a lot going on recently and I've come to the point of seriously wishing that I didn't exist. Sometimes I don't know if I'm safe. Everywhere I see people saying that you should do whatever makes you happy or that you should just be yourself but it's not that easy. How can you be yourself when so much is at stake? If being yourself completed dismantles your whole life? I can't love myself and I can't accept myself. I just wish I wasn't me. Why am I even here. I don't understand the point. All I do is hurt people all the time. Everyone says that I'll get through it and that I'll find happiness again. I don't believe it and if I did, I just know this will all come back. I've felt this way before. I just hate who I am so much. I just needed to vent.

Could you be suffering 'burn out'...you sound like you could do with venting or cheering up.

Take a long shower

[franz kafka]

I'm sorry you're feeling down. Things will get better even if they seem like they won't right now. Hang in there.