who is anxious/stressed about Easter? (possibleTW of brief sexual abuse mentioned)

Blueberrybook · Mar 30, 2018, 08:51 AM

I am so anxious and stressed out about Easter.

First we are having an Easter celebration with my extended family (mom & dad, sisters, nieces, aunts & uncles, grandmother). One of my aunts I totally dislike (she failed to report her ex husband for sexual abuse that went on when I was a kid and she couldn't not know about it).

Another of my aunts always comments on my weight, whether it's up or down (I have a past with an eating disorder). She seems to watch everything I put on my plate like a hawk and what do eat and don't eat. My 10 year old daughter has tons of sensory issues, including hatred of loud noises, won't wear pants because they are "too tight", has meltdowns, doesn't yet tie a bow, will only eat separated foods that are not seasoned. My aunt always tell me how I should be parenting her to get rid of these behaviors. (I really think my daughter may have sensory processing disorder or even very mild autism, but my husband (her father) doesn't want her to get diagnosed and "labeled", so we have a rift there.) Anyway, this aunt thinks watching shows something like Nanny 911 makes her an expert on parenting. And the crazy thing is, she never even had kids herself! How dare you tell me how to parent when you haven't been there at all yourself? And doesn't she realize every child is a unique person, just the same as adults are? You can't jump lump all kids into one bunch; they are unique individuals.

So between these 2 aunts, I am stressed out about the Easter celebration tomorrow. I do look forward to seeing my mom, grandmother, sister, and nieces, and the one aunt on my father's side of the family. But everyone has different political views from my husband and me, and they will get talking about politics or religion, and it really upsets him, and I can't blame him.

Ugh. Can't wait until tomorrow is over & done with!

Mar 30, 2018, 09:05 AM

Try your hardest not to focus on your two aunts. It sounds like the aunt who accuses you of being a bad parent can't be bothered to understand mental illness or child raising in general, so don't let her ignorance get to you. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, and that's just one person's opinion. I'm sure there are plenty of other people who have different opinions.

If your husband doesn't want your daughter labeled, then have you asked him why?

Some of my family members always comment on my weight and what I'm eating, so I know that awful feeling. (I've never had an eating disorder, but I have GI issues and I'm underweight as a result.)

I hope your easter is okay, and if not, that it passes by quickly.

wildflowerchild25 · Mar 30, 2018, 10:04 AM

I used to stress out about family gatherings because my uncle and grandfather are such d*cks but now I don’t worry about it. I’m just sorry it stresses my grandmother out so much. They really are d*cks, god.

Mar 30, 2018, 11:08 AM

easter makes me sad for some reason.

I think it probably has a lot to do with the time of year (close to spring/ summer), and also probably a lot to do with the fact that my family never got me an easter egg- or indeed any easter candy.

this year, I actually got an easter egg.

it's a bitter sweet moment, though I feel I don't really deserve it- and feel I should take it back, I feel greatful too and like 1 is better than nothing

katydid777 · Mar 30, 2018, 11:20 AM

I won't be doing much. My H is out of town, and I get to adult sit my oldest sibling/brother. I will probably pick up some Caption D's, KFC, or Taco Bell. Even if my H was here, we wouldn't be doing anything!!!!!!!

Wild Coyote · Mar 30, 2018, 11:44 AM

I am feeling overwhelmed. There is too much going on.

WC

Merlin · Mar 30, 2018, 11:50 AM

I’m going down to Calgary with my dad and stepmom to visit extended family. I’m looking forward to it for the most part, but my grandma sometimes can be really mean. She’ll criticize my weight, for example. I’m hoping she’s nice this weekend.

Unrigged64072835 · Mar 30, 2018, 01:59 PM

I don't have any extended family nearby to visit or host. It will be just another day with maybe more chocolate than usual. And pranks, since it's also April Fool's Day.

bizi · Mar 30, 2018, 08:42 PM

my hubby is out of town visiting his mother for easter this year. He gave a talk about eddie van halen today at a conference then heads to his moms saturday thru thursday. It will be a nice visit. All of the snow there has melted.
went to the good friday crawfish boil and had catfish. it was very good.
my friends husbands family is nice.
came home and went to fat pats for dinner, ate too much.
I work saturday then off for easter, no plans at all.
bizi
oh boy another hot flash!

greentires4me · Mar 31, 2018, 06:30 AM

My mom wants to have Easter on Sunday and expects me to invite everyone...I want to invite my friends but she is against that totally. I am so tired my mental health is concerning me my psych nurse says she thinks I am putting recovery on the back burner but that’s not the truth she sees me once every two weeks. She thinks all this poop is my way not to be accountable towards myself but she has no clue. I don’t tell her everything it’s been really bad lately she thinks it’s like I am just going to get better just like that a snap of the fingers.

amicus_curiae · Mar 31, 2018, 07:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shattered sanity

easter makes me sad for some reason.

I think it probably has a lot to do with the time of year (close to spring/ summer), and also probably a lot to do with the fact that my family never got me an easter egg- or indeed any easter candy.

this year, I actually got an easter egg.

it's a bitter sweet moment, though I feel I don't really deserve it- and feel I should take it back, I feel greatful too and like 1 is better than nothing

Oh, wow. I think that Protestants were more likely to put on Easter finery to attend church. But we Catholics did share getting a surprise (!was it!) Easter basket chock full of magical chocolate eggs. Oh, and the dyed eggs.

I don’t even know if anyone makes the type of chocolate eggs now.

Feel grateful, eh, and enjoy your egg.

(Um, Easter is tomorrow, right? Sunday, April 1, 2018 -> yeah.)

scatterbrained04 · Mar 31, 2018, 09:56 AM

I'd be a lot more stressed if people were coming over and I had to cook and clean. This year, I don't have anyone coming over. I just have to go to my parents' house. That will be slightly stressful just because it's a lot of people so I'll be dealing with anxiety. I don't do well with crowded places.