[lacerta]

It's five years since diagnosis, I'm stable, I've done great in therapy, but...
relationship with extended family and friends are difficult. I slip away from everyone. One reason is that I don't feel loved, I see only black and white, I exagerate. Other is - if I'm either manic or depressed it's hard to keep my house clean and tidy and I'm ashamed to invite anyone.
I've had a lot of toxic people around and I'm slipping away from these relationships intentionally, but then I'm left with loneliness and depression. Is there a way out of this cycle?

[yellow_fleurs]

That's tough. Do you think you could work on the relationship issues in therapy? If you are mostly stable and it is not just related to mood episodes, then maybe there are some things to look at there. Maybe you can meet up with people somewhere besides your house if you are uncomfortable inviting them? I am sorry to hear you are having this problem. You deserve relationships and to feel loved!

[Moreta]

I suck at relationships so I just send people memes. At least I can make them laugh hopefully. Every now and then I actually talk to people until they stop replying. ha.

[~Christina]

Between BP and chronic pain I have a hard time following through with plans I make with my friend. I “ want” to do X ... but I wake up that day and I’d rather just keep to myself. Tonight she was going to come over and watch a movie with my husband and I , sounds simple right? Well nope. I put it off til tomorrow and I’ll still want to bail but I won’t.

Right now I’m a sucky friend

[Cocosurviving]

For me I don’t have good luck with friends. My non-mentally ill childhood friend bailed. I had a friend from college that I found out had bipolar. We got a long great. Down the road she stopped answering calls and texts. She did not believe in taking meds. I met met a lady in mental health support group. She is a LPN and has bipolar 2. After a while we became good friends. I eventually moved out of state but we stayed in contacted. We would talk or text every few months. She was back in school to become an RN and I was so proud of her. I called one day to check on her. Someone answered the phone and said I had the wrong number. Just like that she was gone. My childhood friend I knew for 18 years. But my two bipolar friends we shared more and deeper. I miss the two of them so much it hurts.

[pirilin]

A way out is like finding the cure for the common cold.
I take it one day at a time and try to maximize it.

[*Laurie*]

Maybe I'm incorrect, but I've never thought of seeing things in black/white terms or exaggerating as part of bipolar disorder.

[Unrigged64072835]

I have other reasons for not making or keeping friends. I miss some of them but most used me so it's just not worthwhile.

[Movingon69]

I've posted many threads about my relationship with my kids. My husband has tried to mediate things to the point one of them is extremely upset with him. I've also felt the "I'm not loved" by them through the time of me raising them. I did so much for them during my mania period but I'm sure they felt abandoned during my depression state. THey only seem to remember the bad and not the good. He's thinking about trying to get them to come down and all of us go to see my therapist.

Friends: Wow. I have a small group of friends that I know are true friends. They've stayed with me when I back out of plans. I've told this small group about my BP. Just got back from a 2 week vacation with one of them. But, recently I thought I had a large group of new girl friends. Before I was dx I discovered many of them were only "friends" because of my position in the community. Out of that group (about 12) only two still invite me to do things. I once heard that people who everyone only has a small group of "true" friends. I don't know if that's true or not. But, it is certainly true in my case.