[Crook32]

My emotional pain is so bad that is causes physical pain. This week I was barely at work with all the appointments I had to go to. My IBS came back about two years ago and now I am in the bathroom at least six times a day if not more. I don’t know every morning if I will make the drive to work without finding a bathroom. I am tired all the time and pretty much stay in bad all weekend.

My T just increased me to 3 times a week. I don’t know why because I am pretty sure she doesn’t like me. I see my pdoc every 1-2 weeks. We are changing my meds again for the one hundredth time.

My quality of life is terrible. No one should have to love like this. I think about suicide daily. Just too much of a coward to do it. Life sucks. I am having mental issues again so it makes my job difficult. I just want to check out.

[SorryShaped]

I feel like giving up a lot too.

I wish I had an answer.
quite often, I wonder if their's any point to it at all.

Possible trigger:

a lot of people will say something along the lines of well, you need to find the point to life- you need to find what you enjoy.

so that at the end of your life you can have it taken away from you?

doesn't seem fair to me that.

I don't think finding something you enjoy is really enough

but don't know what is.

if people knew that, then perhaps we'd all have a better understanding of why we were on this earth

Possible trigger:

often I wonder this:

if I wasn't born, and I wasn't ever a part of life, would it have been easier?

it seems the point to my life has been to be abused by people and to be abandoned, and that's unfair

Why do you think your therapist doesn't like you? If she didn't like you, I don't think she would've offered to see you 3 times a week. She probably would've ignored your struggles and abandoned you when you needed her the most, but that's just my personal opinion.

But anyway, I'm so sorry you have to deal with all of this crap. I remember everything you've been going through at work; you don't deserve it. I hope your life makes a quick turnaround even though I know you've been struggling for so long.

Biologically the only purpose of life is to survive and reproduce. And we humans have added pain to everything including all of the only known biosphere, the 'true' purpose of life has become to enjoy your life... not everyone can do that, unfortunately. I hope everything eventually gets better for you.

[wiretwister]

we can design or chose a point to our life ... we can plot , list , desire and design anything we want ... to have , to reach for , to own or to enjoy ... ( that is what we can do ) ... but outside of ourself .... there is no point . .. Tigger .

[Fuzzybear]