[jtassar93]

I had a pdoc appointment today. I wrote a decent size note I just planned to read from. And I did. It looked like she was listening. I explained how my seroquel was working well because I only heard voices on and off and they weren’t the scary ones or voices tellling me to do things. Also told her that the entire month I only had visual hallucinations 2 times. Then explained my moods and anxiety. It wasn’t even that long.

She then asked me in numerous ways if: I was still hearing things, seeing things, of seroquel was helping, my sleep, if I was still depressed.

I can understand if she needs to ask for the appointments sake but it’s like the answers I gave her TWICE didn’t register. I was at 600mg seroquel and told her I didn’t want any higher because I wouldn’t be able to function. I also said my antidepressant wasn’t working and I think it was making me suicidal.

She UPPED my seroquel to 800mg and didn’t change anything else! I at least wanted to be off the antidepressant. I have desperately wanted and needed something new for my anxiety for MONTHS. I understand we can only change one thing at a time but I’m done messing with seroquel. Some people hear things on and off no matter what and that’s me.

I’m only taking 400mg seroquel, not 800mg. I’m not taking the antidepressant, it made me suicidal according me my actions and thoughts and the label on it. I’m not taking my anti anxiety because it does NOTHING. I don’t even have withdrawals. I’ll take my lithium.

My next appointment is in a month. But I don’t know what to tell her. She had been great so far. Only been seeing her a short time. But it seems like she wasn’t listening. Help please. It crushed my mood today and I slept until 5pm and yelled and then ignored everyone who was trying to help but I just feel angry

[Victoria'smom]

I'm so sorry she didn't listen to you. Can you continue taking 600 mg? The 800 mg may help with anxiety. I know low level seroquil does maybe take some PRN? I'd be weary of changing anything without pdoc's permission. I understand doing it though. Do you have a therapist that can advocate for you?

[jtassar93]

Originally Posted by Miguel'smom

I'm so sorry she didn't listen to you. Can you continue taking 600 mg? The 800 mg may help with anxiety. I know low level seroquil does maybe take some PRN? I'd be weary of changing anything without pdoc's permission. I understand doing it though. Do you have a therapist that can advocate for you?

I only have a few 300mg pills left for a few nights to keep me on 600mg then I will have 400mg and supposed to take 2 for 800mg. I can’t function on that high a dose so I’ll just do 400. I’m not continuing an antidepressant that makes me suicidal. That was the worst. And I haven’t barely taken Valium in forever because it does nothing at all so there’s no point.

I’m just soooooo upset and I don’t know what to do now or tell her next time. I just want someone to listen to me and I want to feel okay. Not perfect. But I’m so tired of flip flopping and wanting((( to die ))) constantly

[jtassar93]

Also no I don’t have a therapist yet unfortunately

[Victoria'smom]

Can the pills be cut in half so you still take 1.5 or your 600 mg?

[jtassar93]

Originally Posted by Miguel'smom

Can the pills be cut in half so you still take 1.5 or your 600 mg?

I think they’re no crush, cut, or chew but I’d have to double check. I mean I was fine at 400mg before she moved me to 600mg. Not much changed. It has been said by doctors that I might need 2 antipsychotics. The 400mg helps a lot but no matter how high I go on that I still will have my voices even if they aren’t harmful because I’m schizoaffective bipolar 1 and psychosis doesn’t go away for long periods of time for me. That’s just what they told me in the hospital

[Blueberrybook]

That’s a high dose of Seroquel. I thoughts my dose was high, and it’s 400 mg. Any chance you can get put on a waiting list for a different pdoc, one who will listen to you?

[jtassar93]

I guess I do get upset and make a bigger deal out of small things. I’m so pathetic

[Wild Coyote]

I don't see you as "pathetic."

I like you and love hearing from you.

I am so sorry you go through so much!


WC

[Row Jimmy]

Don't let the p-doc dictate your happiness. You are you, no more, no less. Find your form and take control. Everyone else can go screw themselves.

[*Laurie*]

You are not pathetic. And you are certainly not alone in your frustration with your pdoc!

[*Laurie*]

Whoops...meant to continue that post.

I like my pdoc. She's insightful - so much so that it often surprises me. In general, she listens. Yet...I am always left wondering why she asks about my sleep (also in relation to Seroquel). When I tell her that my sleep is troublesome, she replies with, "Ohhh...5 hours of unbroken sleep is good..."

?????

No, 5 hours of sleep is does not, in any way, leave me functional. I feel physically horrible, certainly cannot drive safely, and have cognitive difficulties. The solution is that I have to be up for awhile, then return to sleep for 90 minutes - and, when all is said and done, I am extremely fatigued all day. She either cannot hear me when I tell her that, or she doesn't know what to do. So she skates over it.

In another thread, Christina posted that she was prescribed a certain AP, gained 7 lbs. in 1 month from it, so tossed it into the garbage. So smart! She set what I think is an excellent boundary. She practiced self-care. I'm a good girl and always do what the pdoc tells me to do. And I am so sorry for that. I've spent 3 decades on meds that have probably ruined my health, and a lot of my life. I've gained over 100lbs on that "poison", Seroquel. I am embarrassed to be seen. So...that's supposed to help my mental health? I don't get it.

Sorry for the rant. Mostly, I mean to say that you are not alone. And I also believe that 800mg. of Seroquel is an insanely high dose. In addition, I want to mention that a therapist can be an excellent liaison between you and your pdoc.