Important question

I spoke to my pdoc. She is increasing my Latuda and also wants me to stay in IOP until it’s completion. I didn’t take my meds this morning and admitted that to her and she just gently reminded me I will be hospitalized if I choose not to take them. She encouraged me to briefly describe what is happening to my husband so I will have some accountability so I just told him that I feel like I’m not mentally ill and it’s making it difficult to take my meds because I feel like they are unhealthy for me. He did not, to my surprise, overreact and understood...even said anyone with chronic illness feels this way sometimes (he has heart disease). He said he would look out for me. I just hope he doesn’t nag me and take it overboard.

I'm so sorry you're going through all of this, cashart10 I'm glad you're getting the help and support that you need and deserve. I hope things will get better soon for you. You deserve it. You're going through so much. You don't deserve to suffer like this. Don't worry, I'm sure you'll be able to get through all of this. You're a wonderful person. Stay strong, cashart10. Stay safe and take care of yourself. You're awesome! You're strong! You're a warrior! Try to hang on. Remember that we're here for you if you need it. Feel free to PM me anytime. Let me know if I can do something to help you. Wish you good luck! Let us know how it goes. I'm so sorry you have to deal with all of this

Good on you for reaching out to your pdoc with the truth about compliance and your reasons for not taking your meds. Unfortunately it is very common for people to stop being med compliant, and some of us know the havoc that can wreck people's lives as a result. I also feel my meds are unhealthy and stop believing I need them sometimes but I think after my last catastrophic episode I am not going to do that again.

Thank you! I have said many, many times that I have learned my lesson and will never stop them again but I can’t seem to get that through to my brain when it’s time to take them. I did take my Latuda tonight in front of my husband (it has to be taken with food) so hopefully tonight will go just as well but my head is just saying that these drugs are hurting more than helping. It just doesn’t make sense right now that I have a mental illness. It all feels spiritual. And, I’m just struggling. But, I will do my best to at least continue being honest.

Thank you so much for your encouragement!