[iliama]

Hi, I am completely new to this forum. I decided to come here for advice. I would like to start off with, as well as bipolar 1 disorder, I have high functioning autism, PTSD, and an eating disorder (which has subsided a lot and I haven't had an episode in a very long time). I am not sure if I am going about recovery the right way. Basically, I have been through extensive trauma, which led me to want to help others and give back. Helping others truly gives me joy, and makes me extremely happy and content. As a result of this, I have begun my journey to start becoming a social worker, and got accepted into a great university. On top of this, I volunteer tutoring inmates and refugees, I work with human trafficking victims on the weekends, I work as a peer specialist, I mentor at risk youth and special needs children, and I am also a suicide hotline worker. I am aware this is a lot, especially being the fact that most of it is volunteer work except for the peer specialist. I don't go to school full time either, I figured I should take it slow and steady so I don't mess anything up. I am only taking one class, as well as working 50 hours a week between volunteering and my actual job. My mom says she misses me and is extremely worried for my mental health. But I feel fine, I love what I do, and it gives me joy and purpose. I don't have friends outside of my work, and I am okay with it (I have always been unable to make friends, maybe due to my autism). When I volunteer and work, I find myself acting in a way I have never acted before, mature, charismatic, and overall the person I've always wanted to be. The people I help make me feel so happy and loved. I would do anything for them. But sometimes I wonder if my lifestyle is wrong. Everyone says I need to focus more on myself, and I think I do enough of that, I exercise and read and eat healthy and meditate. But I still question it. I guess my question is, do you think I should change my lifestyle as well? I am aware its not typical, but I find it very therapeutic and fulfilling. This is the first time in years I haven't been depressed or manic.

[sarahsweets]

I believe that helping others is one of the most rewarding things you can do for yourself and others. Through AA I get to work with other addicts and volunteer in a women's prison. I've spoken at rehabs and generally try to be kind. I would not be able to maintain my recovery if I didnt have the opportunity to work with others. The best way to get out of your own head and not focus on yourself negatively is to help others. Sharing your own experiences makes you relatable and helps keep you grounded and self aware. As long as you are not neglecting yourself- and your body would give you warning signs like illness, fatigue and depression- I feel like your lifestyle works for you. What about yourself does your family think you should be working on? Does what they think matter enough to you that you would stop doing what you are doing? Do you think you are unfulfilled or overextended? I feel like you would know this. I personally think you seem to be doing all the right things that are meaningful to you.

If you're happy and stable, I don't see it as you doing something wrong.

[wiretwister]

I so glad your able to do so much and be so happy ... but my selfish side wonders if your energy comes from being manic / hypo ... and there may come a day when it will be so over whelming ... I hope I am wrong ... either way I say enjoy your life ... do what you want and plan your own path in life ... I admire your unselfish giving ... good luck ... Tigger ...

Have you just recently taken on all this or have you been doing it for awhile? If it's not indicative of a manic uptick, and you're happy with it, it's probably ok. Is it only your mom who has expressed concern about it? I might be reading a little too much into word choice, but is it possible that she's using this concern for her own ends? (That she wants more of you for herself, and is expressing it as concern over your mental health?) Again, I might be reading too much into your word choice, but something about it just caught me. Has she expressed specific concerns? Does she tend to be overprotective?

I'll stop inundating you with questions now, lol.

Welcome to the forums, btw!

[Nammu]

Why mess with something that is working?

[MickeyCheeky]

Welcome, iliama! I hope you'll like this forum! It's full of SO MANY great, kind, strong, wise and wonderful people just like YOU ARE! I'm sure you'll get alongfwell with EVERYONE and everyone will get along well WITH YOU! I completely agree with what all the other great, kind, wise, wonderful posters have already wisely said better than I ever could! You've been given lots of great, kind, wise and wonderful advice! I'd suggest to follow it as much as you can if you can and want to! I completely agree with what all the other wise posters have already wisely said better than I ever could! You're not doing ANYTHING WRONG at all! In fact I'd say it's the exact opposite! You're helping out so many people and you're being so KIND and SUPPORTIVE to everyone! Most importantly, you're helping out yourself as well and that's WONDERFUL! I'd say as long as you feel happy and fulfilled just keep doing what you're doing and what makes you happy! If you DO feel overwhelmed by all of this you can always try to take it easy on yourself and reduce the amount of work that you're doing! There's nothing wrong with giving up a thing or two! You're already doing SO MUCH after all! Of course that's just my opinion though! The final decision is up to you! I'd suggest to talk to your mother about this and see how it goes from there if you haven't already! Maybe that could help! Just make her understand how much all of this is important for you and that it's actually making you feel better! Reassure her that if there will be any problems concerning your mental health, you'll see what you can do! I feel like that's pretty fair and you DO need to be happy and do what you feel like it's the best thing for YOURSELF FIRST! Just take it easy, ok? Just remember to take all the time you need it! Just remember to take it one step at the time! Just remember to take baby steps! Just remember that there's no need to hurry! Just remember all of this and I'm sure you'll do GREAT like you're already doing! Remember that we're here for you if you need it! Feel free to PM me anytime! Let us know if there's ANYTHING AT ALL that we can do to HELP YOU OUT! We'll ALL be glad to help you in any way we can! I PROMISE YOU THAT! Wish you good luck! Please let us know how it goes and please keep us updated as much as you can if you want to! We DO want to know if things will turn out ok for you and if you need any help from us or from anyone else! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR WHAT YOU'RE DOING! You're a STRONG, WONDERFUL PERSON! PLEASE REMEMBER THAT! Sending many hugs to you, iliama!

[~Christina]

As long as it’s all not being fueled by hypo/mania then I say GOOD and good for everyone you are helping.

I work in medical all my life, always caring for others and it felt great to know I was making a difference.

Do what makes you happy and find a balance to keep yourself healthy while doing so much for others.

Glad your here posting

[bizi]

I think you are doing everything right.
just it may be a bit too much. You may putter out.
Hope you come back...and let us know how it is going.
bizi

[FriendlyJoe]

Originally Posted by iliama

Hi, I am completely new to this forum. I decided to come here for advice. I would like to start off with, as well as bipolar 1 disorder, I have high functioning autism, PTSD, and an eating disorder (which has subsided a lot and I haven't had an episode in a very long time). I am not sure if I am going about recovery the right way. Basically, I have been through extensive trauma, which led me to want to help others and give back. Helping others truly gives me joy, and makes me extremely happy and content. As a result of this, I have begun my journey to start becoming a social worker, and got accepted into a great university. On top of this, I volunteer tutoring inmates and refugees, I work with human trafficking victims on the weekends, I work as a peer specialist, I mentor at risk youth and special needs children, and I am also a suicide hotline worker. I am aware this is a lot, especially being the fact that most of it is volunteer work except for the peer specialist. I don't go to school full time either, I figured I should take it slow and steady so I don't mess anything up. I am only taking one class, as well as working 50 hours a week between volunteering and my actual job. My mom says she misses me and is extremely worried for my mental health. But I feel fine, I love what I do, and it gives me joy and purpose. I don't have friends outside of my work, and I am okay with it (I have always been unable to make friends, maybe due to my autism). When I volunteer and work, I find myself acting in a way I have never acted before, mature, charismatic, and overall the person I've always wanted to be. The people I help make me feel so happy and loved. I would do anything for them. But sometimes I wonder if my lifestyle is wrong. Everyone says I need to focus more on myself, and I think I do enough of that, I exercise and read and eat healthy and meditate. But I still question it. I guess my question is, do you think I should change my lifestyle as well? I am aware its not typical, but I find it very therapeutic and fulfilling. This is the first time in years I haven't been depressed or manic.

Hi iliama
You pretty much described me except for the career choice. You're a typical person in my book.

Why would you want to change from what you're doing now? Nothing you said would warrant the need for change. I'm glad you're doing great and using your talents to better the world. Keep inspiring and helping others as I do. People need as much kindness and proper teachings as possible to combat all the hate that's a derivative from generations of incompetent upbringing.

As for parents. I had my time with them and now I'm an adult and busy with my life and goals I've set. We don't have much time and must be wise with every minute.

Wish you well, do not change and keep helping those that need it.

[FearLess47]

Originally Posted by bizi

I think you are doing everything right.
just it may be a bit too much. You may putter out.
Hope you come back...and let us know how it is going.
bizi

Had the same thought... "Busyness" can be a way of avoiding...not for everyone. But for me it is/was. Last year I was in similar roles...I ran and ran and helped and helped and ran and helped and smiled and helped, until I hit a gigantic wall. I was ignoring my own physical pain and had to have another spine surgery. 9 months later and I had to basically quit everything. I have ignored the inside pain for decades and now have nowhere to go, but to therapy to try and figure it out.

It's an individual journey for us all. A saying that struck me hard last year was, "Take a break before you need one."

FearLess47