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#1
Jun 07, 2019, 03:18 PM
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I'm at the beginning of a depressive/psychotic episode. The Entity that puts suicidal thoughts into my head has shown itself. It's watching me through the lights and is controlling my thoughts. Fortunately I still have enough insight to tell that the thoughts aren't my own and shouldn't act on them.
I emailed pdoc and she thinks I should get evaluated at the ED. I don't think I need to because I'm not a danger to myself. I've got a few trips planned for June that I've already paid for and can't cancel. I'm worried they'll lock me up and I'll lose my deposit. What should I do?
__________________
dx: schizoaffective bipolar type; OCD; GAD rx: clozapine, clonazepam PRN |
 fern46, still_crazy, Sunflower123
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 still_crazy
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#2
Jun 07, 2019, 03:23 PM
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What’s most important? Your safety or your trip?
__________________
schizoaffective bipolar type PTSD generalized anxiety d/o haldol, prazosin, risperdal and prn klonopin and helpful cogentin |
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#3
Jun 07, 2019, 03:42 PM
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Get evaluated, the faster it is caught the easier it is to treat.
__________________
Dx: Me- SzA Husband- Bipolar 1 Daughter- mood disorder+ Comfortable broken and happy "So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk My blog |
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#4
Jun 07, 2019, 05:03 PM
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Go and get the help you need. Your brain is manifesting full on entities and that isn't going away on its own. You're in no shape to travel like that. Maybe you can still make your trips or at least one of them if you do something about this now. I'm glad you are still able to separate your thoughts. Now go and fight for yourself. You know what needs to be done. You're worth it.
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#5
Jun 07, 2019, 05:27 PM
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Definitely get help. What good is traveling if you’re just going to feel miserable and likely feel worse in the long run? Your health is more important than lost deposits.
__________________
Bipolar 1, PTSD, anorexia, panic disorder, ADHD Seroquel, Cymbalta, propanolol, buspirone, Trazodone, gabapentin, lamotrigine, hydroxyzine, There's a crack in everything. That is how the light gets in. --Leonard Cohen |
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#6
Jun 07, 2019, 06:24 PM
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i don't know, honestly. im somewhat inclined to agree with everyone else, but...would a hospital make things better or worse for you? these days, they mostly play with meds, anyway. can your pdoc give you something to help you calm down without having to go thru all the drama?
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#7
Jun 07, 2019, 06:45 PM
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I talked to the resident on call. He is trying to get in touch with my doctor to up the clozapine. In the meantime, he suggested clonazepam. I've already taken 4x my normal dose and am drinking alcohol too. Probably not the best combination but it's making me feel floaty and distracted.
__________________
dx: schizoaffective bipolar type; OCD; GAD rx: clozapine, clonazepam PRN |
| Sunflower123, Victoria'smom
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#8
Jun 07, 2019, 06:53 PM
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I feel floaty and high. I desperately want to hurt myself.
__________________
dx: schizoaffective bipolar type; OCD; GAD rx: clozapine, clonazepam PRN |
| fern46, Sunflower123, zapatoes
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#9
Jun 07, 2019, 06:53 PM
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If I were in the situation you've described, I'd go to the ED. But, you have a lot of experience with the entity so it is likely different for you.
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice Ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 6 mg  Gabapentin 600 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily |
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#10
Jun 07, 2019, 07:33 PM
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Quote:
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#11
Jun 07, 2019, 11:02 PM
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YES! Yes you should go to ED. Your life is more important. You can't go away if you are incredibly ill, or worse. Take care.
__________________
Bipolar 1 with psychotic features PTSD  "Phew! For a minute there I lost myself." 'Karma Police' by Radiohead |
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#12
Jun 07, 2019, 11:31 PM
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I would go to the ED. Drinking on top of taking more benzo to begin with is really not going to help matters.
Stay safe
__________________
Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
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#13
Jun 08, 2019, 06:56 AM
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Franz, wondering if you're at the hospital.
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice Ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 6 mg Gabapentin 600 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily |
| fern46
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#14
Jun 08, 2019, 11:19 AM
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The resident on call had me up my clozapine and I'm feeling a lot better today. Going to hold off on the hospital for now.
Thank you all for your concerns!
__________________
dx: schizoaffective bipolar type; OCD; GAD rx: clozapine, clonazepam PRN |
| still_crazy, Sunflower123
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| still_crazy
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#15
Jun 08, 2019, 11:45 AM
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I'm glad you're feeling better.
__________________
Dx: Me- SzA Husband- Bipolar 1 Daughter- mood disorder+ Comfortable broken and happy "So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk My blog |
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#16
Jun 08, 2019, 12:05 PM
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Good to see that you're feeling more settled.
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice Ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 6 mg Gabapentin 600 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily |
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#17
Jun 08, 2019, 01:43 PM
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Glad you are feeling better.
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| Reply |
This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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