[BipolarWolf]

I was doing some reading online and this popped up. I love reading "The Mightys'" articles. Sometimes they are right on what I needed to read or hear that day / night. I think it would be great if we could add more to this in a forum post. Or, just comment on individual ones. The first article for "25 'Harmless' Comments That Actually Hurt People With Mental Illness " is here :

25 ‘Harmless’ Comments That Actually Hurt People With Mental Illness | The Mighty

Then the other one is "25 Quotes Everyone With a Mental Illness Should Hear " is located here : 25 Quotes Everyone With a Mental Illness Should Hear | The Mighty

[fern46]

I actually see wisdom in some of the 'harmless' statements. I suppose you never know how someone will respond, but for example there are just some things I give to God so that I can turn off my worry. Sometimes I do just need to take a walk and relax. I am strong and it is good to be reminded of that. Facing my fears is key to healing for me and I remind myself constantly to think positive. I can see how some of these turns of phrase could be annoying at certain times, but then I could also use them as an opportunity to hold gratitude that someone who cares for me is offering love the best they know how. For me, it is the intent that makes a difference. People struggle to understand us often, but we can help them grasp it a little if we are willing to meet them where they are and take the hand they offer even if it is misguided. Just my two cents...

I'm a big fan of the second list.

BipolarWolf, thank you for sharing these articles. It was great to compare the topic in the first to the one in the second.

A couple in the potentially hurtful comments aren't always hurtful for me, depending on who says them. That's often key. The delivery, as well. A couple of comments that stay in my mind as intended helpful, but feel hurtful are:

"Keep your chin up" - I can't even tell you how many times my father has said this to me. I just hate it! I always see it as a suggestion to "stuff" my pain, which I know is not good. I also see it as him telling me that he doesn't want to deal with my pain as a supporter. I love my father very much, but he has rarely been a good emotional support to me.

"You're strong, you'll get past this" - I actually think this is almost always true, but again, it can come across as dismissive of pain. I can't speak for others here, but I don't want my pain dismissed. I don't want people to feel sorry for me, but sometimes it's nice when people rather say "I know you're hurting. I'm sorry. But you're strong even dealing with what you're dealing with."

I have to leave for my therapy right now, but I'd like to think about a response to the second article and add something after I return.

[BipolarWolf]

You're welcome BirdDancer. I am glad you liked them, I also enjoyed the articles. I know what you mean about the delivery and who says them, There are times when my mom or other people will ask me if I took my medication, it takes a few seconds for me to gauge how the question came across. Sometimes it sounds rude and demeaning, other times it is just normal. But my feelings towards what is being asked is sometimes interpreted wrong. This is because I do not like taking medication and it is a constant reminder that I am not normal and that I require medication to make me seem normal. Not sure if that makes sense to you. But that is my feelings on that.

So true about the ones you mentioned, I know exactly what you mean here. I can see how those would make you feel that way. I think it has to do with the facial expressions, body language and inflection of the voice that are key to receiving those messages. They are important when hearing these messages from people. I also think that it is key as to when the messages are delivered to us that make a big difference. Like as in the case where they don't like our responses, so they again ask about medication and such. It really is not kind and comes across very rude and dismissive as you said.

Thank you for replying to the thread and giving me your input. I like hearing others perspectives, it helps me with my own.

How did therapy go ?

Thanks, BipolarWolf! I definitely understand what you mean.

I'm sorry I didn't continue my response yesterday. I've been slightly under the weather since. My therapy went fine, but today has been rough. I've been busy. I was at my volunteer job all morning, which I barely got through. I came home feeling even more ill and slept almost two hours, which is unheard of for me. I need more time to recoup. I'm glad I have nice leftovers for dinner.

[BipolarWolf]

Originally Posted by BirdDancer

Thanks, BipolarWolf! I definitely understand what you mean.

I'm sorry I didn't continue my response yesterday. I've been slightly under the weather since. My therapy went fine, but today has been rough. I've been busy. I was at my volunteer job all morning, which I barely got through. I came home feeling even more ill and slept almost two hours, which is unheard of for me. I need more time to recoup. I'm glad I have nice leftovers for dinner.

No problem at all. I understand those days/nights all too well. That's good for your therapy appointment. I am sorry you are under the weather and feeling ill. But at least you got a good nap in. I had a rough night last night also. Woke up 6 times. Acid reflux. I knew I shouldn't have eaten that pizza AND the pizza rolls. It's just that they are so good. Leftovers are awesome on days like that. I do hope you feel better soon.

[Phoenix_1]

BipolarWolf, thank you for sharing the articles. Interesting to see what people think is hurtful or helpful.
I follow BP Magazine for Bipolar and Bipolar Awareness - Stop the Stigma pages on Facebook. They often have articles by The Mighty. I read most of them and they're usually helpful. Even if the writer's circumstances are very different from mine, I find something useful almost every time.
I have The Mighty app on my phone too. I try to look at it daily.

[BipolarWolf]

Originally Posted by Phoenix_1

BipolarWolf, thank you for sharing the articles. Interesting to see what people think is hurtful or helpful.
I follow BP Magazine for Bipolar and Bipolar Awareness - Stop the Stigma pages on Facebook. They often have articles by The Mighty. I read most of them and they're usually helpful. Even if the writer's circumstances are very different from mine, I find something useful almost every time.
I have The Mighty app on my phone too. I try to look at it daily.

You are welcome Phoenix. I think it is interesting too, to see different reactions to what people think regarding these articles. Thanks for the ideas. I just joined those. I am shocked I haven't joined them until now. As I sit here typing I am wearing my Mental Health awareness tshirt. Green Ribbon with a heartbeat. I love reading The Mighty' articles. I also enjoy scrolling down reading the comments from people too that are in those articles. I don't have the app for The Mighty. Thanks for your reply to this. I appreciate it.