[unfoldingxwings]

Back in February I was told I am in full remission from my Bipolar Disorder. But I feel like maybe I am relapsing somewhat? It's hard to say.

It's hard when life is really hard. I've been hammered this year with so much crap, and loss. This has probably been the hardest year of my life in many years. So I don't know if I'm just having a hard time with everything going on, or if it's something chemical. I've been running and dealing with crises and problems and so much, non-stop, for months. I'm worn out and exhausted. I haven't been manic at all for years, but I feel like depression is knocking on the door. Or I'm just so battered from everything I've been dealing with and finding it hard to cope.

What I need is a legit vacation where I can rest and do absolutely nothing. I think I might start to feel better then. I'm getting back into a clinic, after moving for the second time this year. So hopefully I can work out answers, or adjust meds or do whatever you do. I'm also going to see a therapist next week. Here's to hoping it helps!

[~Christina]

I personally do not use the word “ Remission”’

Bipolar is an illness that cycles. The level of cycles depends on a lot.

You can be on the best medications and massive self care but for almost every person, there are going to be ups and downs.

Sometimes meds just stop being effective at a certain dose or it’s totally useless. New meds need to tried.

If your becoming unstable ramp up your self care, use every coping skill you have and do get in touch with your Pdoc for prompt treatment.

You will cycle out of this.

Take good care

[Zeroid]

Remission isn't cure. Anything that you feel is genuine, but professionals can help make sense of it. Reactive depression can affect people with endogenous depression, so it's great you're seeing someone. What's good, though, is that you have an understanding of cause, including the fact that life has a habit of getting hard.

I hope it all goes well.

[unfoldingxwings]

My Pdoc didn't really explain what remission means. He just gave me a print out with that on it, but it didn't really explain anything. My therapist at the time just said it meant I cope well enough that it doesn't derail my life. I haven't missed work and I still take care of myself, take meds, etc. I really hate the ups and downs. But what can you do? I can't change how I chemically react to things, I think medication only does so much too.

But feelings are like the weather, so I just hold on as tight as possible, rely on my spirituality and fight my way back up. Or wait for it to pass. Hopefully I can climb out of these low moods, thoughts and feelings.

[Gabyunbound]

It sounds like your feelings are very natural responses to what is going on your life right now. Keep in mind that every dip, every depression, is not necessarily Bipolar-related, and therefore as well, perhaps changes in medication might not be warranted. Though only your pdoc could help you make that decision.

I would give therapy a good chance and has been said, delve deep into your tool box of coping mechanisms. Perhaps you can plan some sort of vacation, perhaps just a weekend out of town, even if it's not until the relatively far future, so that you have something to look forward to.

It sounds like you're going through a very very challenging time. I hope you feel better soon.