[bpcyclist]

In the very few encounters I have had with other people recently, I have noted a lot of anger, irritability, and venom, quite frankly. None of this here on PC, obviously.

I suppose maybe all this COVID stuff may be spilling out the sides. Not sure. Not a psychology expert.


Has anyone else noticed anything like this? Or maybe it's just me...

Yes, I have, but I have also encountered a bit more friendliness than usual, too. I think the "on edge" behavior has likely been exacerbated by the recent requirement to wear a face mask in public in my state. Also, parks have recently been closed in my state, as wildchildflower mentioned. That really does suck!

I need to call my siblings and dad today. I bet they are hating this, too. It has, indeed, had a major negative effect on people's lives. Anxiety levels are noticably high. Mine have been.

People in my state (and my specific area) are vulnerable since we live nestled between NYC and Philadelphia. As of now, New Jersey has/had the second highest number of covid 19 cases in the US, after New York state.

[*Beth*]

Interestingly, I notice a split. People either being very kind and helpful or people being cranky and gruff.

Lots of people are just anxious about the whole situation. Anxiety can manifest itself in terms of anger.

I did see some stupid lady who was b**ching about the color of her cotton candy when she went to pick it up at Wal-Mart pickup. She kept complaining that her son wanted blue, not red. The employees had to explain that they didn't have blue in stock anymore and that red was a substitute. Then she got fuming mad and refused to leave w/o the blue cotton candy. Then a Wal-Mart manager came out and said, "here, you can just have it for free; we'll take it off the bill." Then she STILL b**ched about it and threatened to call corporate. What a f***ing b**ch. lol.

The kid was in the backseat and was throwing a hissy fit the whole time. Then when she gave him some of the red cotton candy to calm down, he calmed down. It really seemed like her son just wanted cotton candy, regardless of color.

[fern46]

I have noticed both like Beth mentioned. Times of great change usually expose what we have hidden beneath. This does not mean that a person who chooses anger or irritability at this time is wholly angry. It simply means the current situation has served as a catalyst to bring forward something they can choose to process.

I like to think of it as a learning experience. Many do not know what it feels like to be in such a state of upheaval. For many of us here, upheaval is very familiar. Normal even. It is similar to the way people here are triggered by various words or phrases here, but it is happening on a grand scale.

When people have emotions and thoughts that are unfamiliar to them that are driven by fearful circumstances they can feel quite lost. Simply being with someone who is in a balanced state can offer them a tremendous service. I think of it like a bridge or a pathway back to something more familiar when they've lost their way. Compassion in the face of venom is a huge light in the dark.

I do not offer this to suggest anyone needs to put up with abuse. I do think though we can compassionately stand our ground and serve as a mirror to allow those spiraling out of control see themselves in our eyes. I know I've needed this type of service when I was sick. For example, my father was my first visitor when I was hospitalized. I could instantly tell he accepted me, but that my behavior was well past ok. I felt loved and he was an anchor back to what I hold dear at a time when I was utterly lost.

I feel that fighting against the venom will serve to extend it. I'm choosing to accept it, meet it where it is and be with it. Hopefully then my own grounded state will serve to transform it.

[Fuzzybear]

[Nammu]

I only go out once every two weeks so haven't noticed much. Did have to take mum to medical appointments but I had to stay in the car so don't know how people acted mum didn't say anything so I figured they were normal. Planning on picking up dinner tomorrow so I'll see very busy people then. Will be interesting to note their behavior.

[Innerzone]

Ha! I forgot to mention, when you brought up the cotton candy story before, Blue, that that is EXACTLY why I take negative reviews (especially where they claim they were treated badly) with a BIG grain of salt (ESPECIALLY on Yelp, because there is no recourse for false information)! People can twist situations utterly. My jaw literally dropped when I first read it (!) Just... WOW.

Like Nammu, I'd have to preface by saying I haven't been out enough to really notice much, and walking around my neighborhood is very mellow. But. I will admit, that on a recent grocery run, I was the grumpy one. But only when I saw people who were being idiotic. One was a group of 3 shopping, who, when they got to the checkout, one was bagging, and the other 2 stood, doing nothing, completely blocking my access to the bagging area (it is split to 2 sides, not on the end like most places). The cashier even looked, wondering why I wasn't bagging, then saw what they were doing and we both rolled our eyes. The other was a mob of homeless blocking access to a transit center. I had to get WAY too close to get through. People being stupid annoys me at the best of times, so in a sense, this was no different. But where I might normally say something, I didn't because I didn't want to risk them acting like terrorists (spitting etc.)

Other than that kind of situation, I'm my usual go out of my way to be helpful kind of person. I actually haven't felt much anxiety.

It does seem that difficult situations bring out the very best and the very worst in people.

And, as ever, you can't fix stupid.

[bpcyclist]

Well, just to be clear, the reason of this post was that I found hundreds of people along the river when the sun came out the other day and it was in the 70s and almost none of them were social distancing. I get it, gorgeous day and all.All the flowers are blooming. Got that. But, I had been out in the country where nobody was for 60 miles and then, suddenly, this mass of humanity when I got back to town.


So, I posted my concerns on a bike site I sometimes go to and got screamed at. Name-called. On and on. Bizarre. When I pointed out that lost of people were dying, there was just more name-calling and cursing. Weird. Weird people. People should be able to hold hands, I was screamed at about. Etc. Etc.

Originally Posted by bpcyclist

Well, just to be clear, the reason of this post was that I found hundreds of people along the river when the sun came out the other day and it was in the 70s and almost none of them were social distancing. I get it, gorgeous day and all.All the flowers are blooming. Got that. But, I had been out in the country where nobody was for 60 miles and then, suddenly, this mass of humanity when I got back to town.

So, I posted my concerns on a bike site I sometimes go to and got screamed at. Name-called. On and on. Bizarre. When I pointed out that lost of people were dying, there was just more name-calling and cursing. Weird. Weird people. People should be able to hold hands, I was screamed at about. Etc. Etc.

Politics, my friend. Ignorance and/or receiving misinformation. Sad! I know you and most of us already know that, but it is still baffling.

[fern46]

Originally Posted by bpcyclist

Well, just to be clear, the reason of this post was that I found hundreds of people along the river when the sun came out the other day and it was in the 70s and almost none of them were social distancing. I get it, gorgeous day and all.All the flowers are blooming. Got that. But, I had been out in the country where nobody was for 60 miles and then, suddenly, this mass of humanity when I got back to town.


So, I posted my concerns on a bike site I sometimes go to and got screamed at. Name-called. On and on. Bizarre. When I pointed out that lost of people were dying, there was just more name-calling and cursing. Weird. Weird people. People should be able to hold hands, I was screamed at about. Etc. Etc.

You're on the good side of sanity. There's a lot of this kind of thinking going around unfortunately. These people could have found less crowded ways to enjoy the outdoors...

[Innerzone]

Originally Posted by bpcyclist

Well, just to be clear, the reason of this post was that I found hundreds of people along the river when the sun came out the other day and it was in the 70s and almost none of them were social distancing. I get it, gorgeous day and all.All the flowers are blooming. Got that. But, I had been out in the country where nobody was for 60 miles and then, suddenly, this mass of humanity when I got back to town.


So, I posted my concerns on a bike site I sometimes go to and got screamed at. Name-called. On and on. Bizarre. When I pointed out that lost of people were dying, there was just more name-calling and cursing. Weird. Weird people. People should be able to hold hands, I was screamed at about. Etc. Etc.

I figured right away that this was the incident that initiated your post. It's mind-boggling. I agree with BirdDancer as to why, and would add that there's been so much written and said that make this appear as an older persons' problem (which is not really true. I literally just looked at the positive test numbers for our state, and they are far more balanced between age groups than people seem to believe). Yet there is this perception that if you're not old that is no big deal, so screw it, just going to carry on.

It's mind-blowingly self-absorbed, but there you have it. There are a LOT of people who don't give a damn about anyone but themselves. Sad, but true.

And if there's one thing that pisses people off, it's being called out on it.

If you don't believe it, you've never called a narcissist out on their behavior.

(* Disclaimer: ***holes abound in all age groups, I don't mean to imply otherwise.)

[luvyrself]

Originally Posted by bpcyclist

Well, just to be clear, the reason of this post was that I found hundreds of people along the river when the sun came out the other day and it was in the 70s and almost none of them were social distancing. I get it, gorgeous day and all.All the flowers are blooming. Got that. But, I had been out in the country where nobody was for 60 miles and then, suddenly, this mass of humanity when I got back to town.
So, I posted my concerns on a bike site I sometimes go to and got screamed at. Name-called. On and on. Bizarre. When I pointed out that lost of people were dying, there was just more name-calling and cursing. Weird. Weird people. People should be able to hold hands, I was screamed at about. Etc. Etc.

---These people cant be watching CNN. Apparently the states, countries who have used social distancing early are the ones like Minnesota who are doing a lot better. Of course, they dont have the crowding either. My son, in Cal where the rules are strict, is letting his kids under age 10 play with other kids at his condo complex. He is working at home, so I guess I dont blame him. Here in Phoenix, we are wearing masks at the grocery. Im the one who is irritable LOL (miss the gym SO much). Phoenix people are always really nice compared to LA.

[~Christina]

Well its a known fact that people behind a keyboard are going to type things they would never say face to face... Are any of those people your friend in real life outside the group??

Maybe you need to consider if you want to stay part of that online group... Im sure there are plenty of others you can join.

Yes its terrible that people felt the need to become angry at you because you voiced your concerns.. Some times there are just sucky humans roaming the earth.

You just have to decide which battle you want to spend your energy on.. In the grand scheme things right now with a world wide crisis Does it really matter that some fools online yelled at you online???

[Fuzzybear]

Originally Posted by fern46

I have noticed both like Beth mentioned. Times of great change usually expose what we have hidden beneath. This does not mean that a person who chooses anger or irritability at this time is wholly angry. It simply means the current situation has served as a catalyst to bring forward something they can choose to process.

I like to think of it as a learning experience. Many do not know what it feels like to be in such a state of upheaval. For many of us here, upheaval is very familiar. Normal even. It is similar to the way people here are triggered by various words or phrases here, but it is happening on a grand scale.

When people have emotions and thoughts that are unfamiliar to them that are driven by fearful circumstances they can feel quite lost. Simply being with someone who is in a balanced state can offer them a tremendous service. I think of it like a bridge or a pathway back to something more familiar when they've lost their way. Compassion in the face of venom is a huge light in the dark.

I do not offer this to suggest anyone needs to put up with abuse. I do think though we can compassionately stand our ground and serve as a mirror to allow those spiraling out of control see themselves in our eyes. I know I've needed this type of service when I was sick. For example, my father was my first visitor when I was hospitalized. I could instantly tell he accepted me, but that my behavior was well past ok. I felt loved and he was an anchor back to what I hold dear at a time when I was utterly lost.

I feel that fighting against the venom will serve to extend it. I'm choosing to accept it, meet it where it is and be with it. Hopefully then my own grounded state will serve to transform it.

[bpcyclist]

Originally Posted by BirdDancer

Politics, my friend. Ignorance and/or receiving misinformation. Sad! I know you and most of us already know that, but it is still baffling.

Thank you, BirdDancer. I always forget about the issue of politics, since I go out of my way not to put mine on anyone else.

[bpcyclist]

Originally Posted by luvyrself

---These people cant be watching CNN. Apparently the states, countries who have used social distancing early are the ones like Minnesota who are doing a lot better. Of course, they dont have the crowding either. My son, in Cal where the rules are strict, is letting his kids under age 10 play with other kids at his condo complex. He is working at home, so I guess I dont blame him. Here in Phoenix, we are wearing masks at the grocery. Im the one who is irritable LOL (miss the gym SO much). Phoenix people are always really nice compared to LA.

It's nice that people in your town are friendly. I like Phoenix alot. I have actually always found LA to be pretty friendly--I worked there a lot. But then, I lived in NYC for a long time and nobody would ever call it friendly. Ha!!!!!!!!!

[bpcyclist]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

Well its a known fact that people behind a keyboard are going to type things they would never say face to face... Are any of those people your friend in real life outside the group??

Maybe you need to consider if you want to stay part of that online group... Im sure there are plenty of others you can join.

Yes its terrible that people felt the need to become angry at you because you voiced your concerns.. Some times there are just sucky humans roaming the earth.

You just have to decide which battle you want to spend your energy on.. In the grand scheme things right now with a world wide crisis Does it really matter that some fools online yelled at you online???

Oh gosh no, none of them are friends at all. We just share a bike interest, that's all.

I have opted out of that group, thank you for the suggestion. The main one I care about is about bike repair and those folks have always been friendly.

I do have to say, part of this may well be me. Maybe all of it is. I don't know. My PTSD emerges when I feel threatened, no doubt about it. And I wonder if sometimes I overreact, that my feelings are hurt too easily and that I am out of touch with reality. I probably do and I probably need to try to work on this, somehow. Not sure what to do there, but I will look at it.


That said, calling someone an a-hole repeatedly in a few posts is something even I can accurately interpret...

[*Beth*]

Originally Posted by bpcyclist

Well, just to be clear, the reason of this post was that I found hundreds of people along the river when the sun came out the other day and it was in the 70s and almost none of them were social distancing. I get it, gorgeous day and all.All the flowers are blooming. Got that. But, I had been out in the country where nobody was for 60 miles and then, suddenly, this mass of humanity when I got back to town.


So, I posted my concerns on a bike site I sometimes go to and got screamed at. Name-called. On and on. Bizarre. When I pointed out that lost of people were dying, there was just more name-calling and cursing. Weird. Weird people. People should be able to hold hands, I was screamed at about. Etc. Etc.

I am so sorry. Very, very foolish people. It's disgusting.

[*Beth*]

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

Lots of people are just anxious about the whole situation. Anxiety can manifest itself in terms of anger.

I did see some stupid lady who was b**ching about the color of her cotton candy when she went to pick it up at Wal-Mart pickup. She kept complaining that her son wanted blue, not red. The employees had to explain that they didn't have blue in stock anymore and that red was a substitute. Then she got fuming mad and refused to leave w/o the blue cotton candy. Then a Wal-Mart manager came out and said, "here, you can just have it for free; we'll take it off the bill." Then she STILL b**ched about it and threatened to call corporate. What a f***ing b**ch. lol.

The kid was in the backseat and was throwing a hissy fit the whole time. Then when she gave him some of the red cotton candy to calm down, he calmed down. It really seemed like her son just wanted cotton candy, regardless of color.

Obnoxious, but this gave me a good laugh . The color of cotton candy...heaven help us!!!!!