[imaginethat]

I had a bout of mania a few months ago. Since it ended, I've been feeling pretty even. But, for the past week I've started getting up early or staying up late with little effect on my day. Today I was driving down the street thinking about how wonderful life is. Now I'm full of self-loathing and my formerly great life seems hopeless.

Am I rapid cycling or is this just the up and down of mania and depression. I'm so tired of adding new medicines or changing meds. I really don't want to have to do either one. But I don't want to feel so out of control.

[bpcyclist]

Originally Posted by imaginethat

I had a bout of mania a few months ago. Since it ended, I've been feeling pretty even. But, for the past week I've started getting up early or staying up late with little effect on my day. Today I was driving down the street thinking about how wonderful life is. Now I'm full of self-loathing and my formerly great life seems hopeless.

Am I rapid cycling or is this just the up and down of mania and depression. I'm so tired of adding new medicines or changing meds. I really don't want to have to do either one. But I don't want to feel so out of control.

There exists a subset of folks w bp 1 who remain mood-unstable even when fairly euthymic. Mood homeostasis appears not to work for us. Perhaps you are one of these people, who actually have a bit more in common w borderline personality people due to the more frequent mood shifts.

This seems to be distinct from rapid or ultradian. Not that it really matters what label we use. What matters is what we do to address it.

[FluffyDinosaur]

I believe rapid cycling "officially" requires 4 or more manic or depressive episodes per year. There's also "ultradian" cycling, where people's moods rapidly fluctuate throughout the day, but to be honest that has always sounded more like borderline to me. Or unstable mood could also be a PTSD symptom. I'm not sure if ultradian cycling is an official diagnosis at this point. I'm not a fan of it as it's currently defined because it muddies the waters between BD and BPD too much. Temporary mood lability can also be indicative of a mixed episode, but in that case I wouldn't expect it to be your "default" state.