[Fuzzybear]

I think this question (hopefully) is relevant to this forum. Do you consider yourself mostly a positive person? And if so, how do you define or experience this? And how does it vary according to mood states (for example there are some (several?) (negative) things I try not to talk about unless necessary... and I try to encourage people. And am loyal. and mostly forgiving, there are more..)

Also, name one or more of your best qualities (I think some of us are down on ourselves a lot because of our illness)

[fern46]

I am a positive person. I was raised to be a positive person thanks to my mother. But... She forced positive emotion even when it was negatively impacting her.

I was trained in school to search outside of the box no matter how outlandish it may seem. I decided in adulthood that positive is sometimes negative.

Because of the above conclusion, I define positivity potentially differently than others would. I look at impact as opposed to things like happy or sad. Sometimes sadness can have a positive impact. So, if it is adding value I see it as positive. If it detracts from my day, it is negative. Manic euphoria would be an example of a positive emotional state with a negative impact. I try to avoid that one. Neutrality can have a positive or negative net impact. Its all about where you've come from, where you are and where you need to go.

My ability to maintain a positive net result each day is pretty solid. I rarely sway because if one aspect is negative I try to balance it in other ways. Major life events or episodes are pretty much the only things that take me into a negative impact oriented state. Even then, I rebound pretty quickly.

It is all about balance. Sometimes negative feelings will come. Negative defeatist thoughts occur. Poor eating days happen. Sometimes I'm spiritually focused on the self and not the whole. That's ok. The goal for me is to recognize it, accept it, allow it to be as long as it needs to and then work to shift it or balance it with another aspect so that I do not get lost in the imbalance.

I'm not aiming for pure rainbows, sunshine and unicorns. Just a nice flow of smiles and overall happiness.

[Soupe du jour]

I consider myself a half glass full type person, for sure. I look at that in terms of attitude towards life. I am not one to become hopeless. I know that good things always exist, even if situations are difficult or environments are stressful.

I am not a grudge holder. Even if someone has treated me horribly, I am open to put negatives behind me, especially if the person/thing is (apologizes or comes to a truce). I find long-term anger and resentment painful, so try hard to move past it. Doing so frees, in a sense. As for my mistakes, I make many. Some hold them against me long-term or permanently. I can't be perfect. I've tried to be at some things and never fully achieved it. I have a choice, accept myself and others (and life, etc.) with faults, or be perpetually disappointed. Acceptance is better. Kinder all around. Anything too bad, one can move on from. Move on in a better direction.

I can certainly have a temper, at times, and can be opinionated. Some may look at that as very negative. I won't say it can't be, but not always. I find it hard to believe when some people say they never exhibit these traits. Or those who don't... I wonder what they might be stuffing/hiding. IOWs, being too holier than thou can seem suspicious.

Bipolar disorder episodes can certainly fuel irritable fires for me. Frustration, extreme fatigue, mental anguish of all sorts, it makes me go into fight or flight, just like any animal, including bears.

[swimmingly]

I struggle with this question. I think its a great question. Like fern46, I was raised by my mother to be positive. Maybe obsessively positive. In the first few weeks with my new therapist we have been exploring trauma, and youth, and how I remember this positivism as strained and dare I say it, manic.

Something I don't remember from my youth is feeling that this positive energy has sincerity with it, and as I left my youth and grew into adolescence... it seemed to be something that was missing like the tin man's heart.

I struggle with being a positive person. I can't seem to do this properly. I can usually help others find positives in their situations, but to find it in mine is not an easy situation. It's something I'm working on with my therapist. We've got a lot of damage to hunt down and I need to work on.

[fern46]

Originally Posted by swimmingly

I struggle with this question. I think its a great question. Like fern46, I was raised by my mother to be positive. Maybe obsessively positive. In the first few weeks with my new therapist we have been exploring trauma, and youth, and how I remember this positivism as strained and dare I say it, manic.

Something I don't remember from my youth is feeling that this positive energy has sincerity with it, and as I left my youth and grew into adolescence... it seemed to be something that was missing like the tin man's heart.

I struggle with being a positive person. I can't seem to do this properly. I can usually help others find positives in their situations, but to find it in mine is not an easy situation. It's something I'm working on with my therapist. We've got a lot of damage to hunt down and I need to work on.

Hunting down damage and working on it is beneficial and positive in my book even if it leads you through dark paths.

Forced positivism. That's an excellent term for what I was taught. It is disingenuous and strains the heart which always knows the truth. That's why I decided it is positive to be true to myself even in anger, fear, sadness or whatever. If I let it flow and allow it without getting caught up in It, it passes and I can get back to those genuine positive feels. If I ignore it, I feel like a liar and the negativity compounds on itself. It makes me feel less real.

Its funny. I work with my mom now to get her to just be honest. She has held so much in it's nuts. Her dam broke a few times and she's learning how to let things flow naturally now. I'm proud of her.

[bpcyclist]

I am fundamentally positive. But depression robs me of that.

[Merlin]

Originally Posted by bpcyclist

I am fundamentally positive. But depression robs me of that.

Me too. I hate depression.

[Fuzzybear]

Originally Posted by bpcyclist

I am fundamentally positive. But depression robs me of that.

I feel this way too

[Daonnachd]

I consider being positive showing dedication to building up my community. I try to lift others up.

The tough part of being bipolar is the social withdrawal that comes with depression and dysphoric mania.

[*Beth*]

What a good and useful thread, Fuzzy.

I think I'm being honest when I say that my family was negative. Oftentimes, very negative. I truly despised that way of living life. I got myself into therapy and into support groups when I was still a teen because I wanted to have a better and more positive perspective on life.

I'm thinking that being negative is a way of coping with anxiety. So I think I'll say that my journey toward mental health is to learn how to cope with anxiety so it doesn't cause me to be a negative and bitter woman. I wanted to live a more emotionally successful life.

One of my positive qualities...I genuinely enjoy listening to people. I'm not the best with giving advice, but I sure will be there for anyone who needs an ear and a hug.

being a positive person means something a little diffrent to me.

it means doing what you need to do to move things forward

like: I need to get up, because if I don't, how is anything going to happen?

I need to take my meds, because if I don't, I'll be wworse

I need to go for this appointment, because it's important

that kind of thing.. when it comes to individual situations, I'd say I'm neither positive or negative. in my experience, before you can be positive about something, you need to see it actually happen with your own eyes.

my response is usually something like well, what happens, happens