Bipolar trying to reduce meds

Talked to pdoc about my meds and what each is for and which ones we could lower. He says that is hard because the ones I could lower are ones I need for side effects. He also said I will have to be on permanently because my disease is severe and can kill me. His wish is that we could cut back but when we try all my symptoms come back. Being bipolar sucks. I am having a hard time accepting that right now.

That's basically where I am, too. I think a lot of us are. I know that Marya Hornbacher had lots of troubles with being consistent on her meds- indeed she wouldn't take them all and then she'd drink which made her symptoms even worse. Eventually we take our meds because that's what we must do. I've tried so many psych meds and had side effects and was taken off.

I will never accept my diagnosis and will always fight (repectfully) to have my meds reduced or removed. Call it a peaceful protest. Maybe for all of us.

One dr I had tried to get me on all sorts of meds when I was depressed and I tried some.... but nothing seemed to work, I was still depressed and suffered insomnia so I decided to ride it out on only lithium. It took 7 months till my sleep improved on its own and I started feeling better. I asked my new dr to switch to lamictal instead and told him I did not want to be in a ton of meds. He agreed that the fewer the better. So that’s the only thing I take and I feel so much better. I’m not sure why or how people I’m end up on so many meds, but I did not want to. I used meditation to help me get some sleep until it finally improved on its own. I didn’t want rebound insomnia with pills.

My bipolar disorder showed itself to be so severe that medications are mandatory, but I also aim to take the fewest possible. Thinking I should ever stop medications is like as if a person with permanent physical illness would think it would miraculously go away. Brain illness is not an allusion, though many people that stigmatize mental illness think it is.

It does suck when we have too many side effect medications. I have a couple, but I've had more. Perhaps you may be able to switch bipolar medications to alleviate or end such side effects. Again, I have. I've also had to suffer the consequences of medications causing permanent damage.

Like Soupe du jour, my illness is so serious that I must take meds to function. Like you, if I didn’t take meds it might be lethal due to the severity. That said, my pdoc and I have worked hard to find the lowest effective doses possible. My experience is that if you absolutely need meds to stay alive, you must come to terms with a fundamental existential question - do I make the best life that I can on the level of meds needed to be effective knowing that I will live, or do I court death by taking doses that are too low or taking none at all?

Once I answered that question for myself, acceptance followed and I began to build my new life. Bipolar can suck, but a lot of other things suck too! Perspective is difficult to achieve.

Yep, I'm riding the same boat, here. "Sure you can cut down on meds - the ones you use for side-effects." (Gee, thanks.)

I am titrating down a second AD, though. As for dropping the side effect meds, sure- all the side effects have returned.

Good post. I am a bit like this... (for me though the side effects are intolerable) Sorry about the late reply. I try to fight them respectfully although they (irl) are not respectful to me. Which makes it harder... I was at one time on too high a dose of meds. And this caused me harm. (they wouldn't agree)... I think there are too many wrong assumptions made by some providers. Too little listening, too many meds (for some anyway) ''Medication and nothing else''... that is what I was told by one provider, who I had paid for. Who with any intelligence or self esteem would accept that? Sorry if this sounds ''arrogant''... that sort of stuff disgusts me. The provider (a ''senior clinician'') had said that without an ounce of empathy... Is it any wonder I don't trust them... Rhetorical question.

I prefer a peaceful protest....

I think most psychiatrists have an "If it ain't broke don't fix it" attitude, and it makes some sense. However, when I would clock a lot of time stable (say six months), I was able to sometimes twist their arm to make a very small reduction, with caution. But certainly no reduction with lesser time stable.

I totally totally understand wanting to lower medications that cause bad side effects. Often it is even necessary. However, a lot of doctors see patients (maybe not you) that wish to lower medications to feel "less ill" or deny the illness to a degree, and its power over their lives. I know that I went through such a stage and it can be dangerous as it makes patients want to quit a medication (or more) as a rebellion. A mix of acceptance and well calculated changes is necessary.

What about reducing meds and adding a non-medicinal approach, such as (maintenance) rTMS? I have no idea whether this is what you're looking for or if your insurance covers it, but thought I'd mention it anyway. TMS is supposed to have similar benefits to ECT (though with somewhat lower effectiveness), with few if any side effects. It's known to work for depression and there's also some evidence it can treat/prevent mania (which would make sense to me since ECT can do that also).

I was on so many meds at one stage I couldn’t keep track.

It’s taken a long time for me to wean onto the meds I’m on - lithium and Abilify. I hope this will keep me stable because I’ve had a lot of up and downs the past year I just want stability to last. I’ve almost forgotten the feeling of not being depressed or not being irritable hypo.

I too need meds but every decade I take a total break and go off everything and reset to a lower amount of pills. Currently I’m only on latuda, propranolol and ambian. Just last week I asked to get off the ambien and am in a wean down phase. I tried to go off myself but found out I’m physically addicted. So NeoSky good on you for toughing it though the insomnia.