[Fuzzybear]

Hey Boots, how are you doing?

[*Beth*]

I have had no less than
FOUR HUNDRED AND TEN messages
telling me that you are missed,
and that every one of those
FOUR HUNDRED AND TEN people
wish you would check in
@MuddyBoots.

Just letting you know .

[*Beth*]

Make that 411....

[MuddyBoots]

I'm alive

[*Beth*]

Hey, you- thanks for checking in. Autumn in Nude Hampster must be absolutely stunning about right now.

[MuddyBoots]

Here's some pics I took on my walk today (will upload to my album shortly).

[MuddyBoots]

So I had an IEA and now have a CD. Drug tests and haldol decanoate shots.

[Nammu]

I’m glad your back boots! But I don’t know what IED or CD means.

The pictures are wonderful. Reminds me of up north. Beautiful.

[*Beth*]

Thank you for the photos, Boots. They remind me of making paper pilgrims in 3rd grade, and how the teacher would show us pictures of autumn where the Pilgrims had lived. Then everyone's paper pilgrims would be stuck onto a wall and they looked so fancy and happy.

[MuddyBoots]

Originally Posted by Nammu

I’m glad your back boots! But I don’t know what IED or CD means.

The pictures are wonderful. Reminds me of up north. Beautiful.

Sorry, IEA is involuntary emergency admission and cd is conditional discharge (basically I went involuntary and unless I want to go back to the state hospital my drug tests oughta be clean and I better show up to pick up my meds and get my monthly haldol hot)

At some point I'm going to do a moderate hike, but I don't want to do it when it's rainy and the leaves and rocks are too slippery to get a good pace going.

[Nammu]

Oooo I’ve had that done to me. My admission was for 6 months though and then they were gonna recommitment me. I took off and left the state. They called it something else though. I don’t think they had things like CDs back then.

Take care.

[MuddyBoots]

Been binging/purging lately. New old thing now that I can't do drugs. Using healthy coping skills all the time is boring.

Currently on:
Haldol decanoate (100mg 1x/month)
Haldol pills (5mg 4x a day--this is a ***** to remember)
Valium (7.5mg 3x day, also a byotch to remember)
Seroquel 100mg HS
amantadine 100mg BID
lamotrigine 200mg qd

[MuddyBoots]

pic of the day

[*Beth*]

***Magnificent!***

[MuddyBoots]

Just had my first therapy appointment in months. We're doing DBT. Based on some things I've said/done she said I might have BPD. Might start a group for DBT, might start a dual-diagnosis group too.
Had a pdoc appointment too. I only have to take the Haldol 3x a day now. I don't get why I have to take the pills at all if I'm on the shot.
I'm exhausted.

[downandlonely]

I want to try a DBT group. My mom did, and I think it helped her a lot. She used to lash out at others a lot more before she did it. I think it has helped her control her temper.

[*Beth*]

Originally Posted by MuddyBoots

Just had my first therapy appointment in months. We're doing DBT. Based on some things I've said/done she said I might have BPD. Might start a group for DBT, might start a dual-diagnosis group too.
Had a pdoc appointment too. I only have to take the Haldol 3x a day now. I don't get why I have to take the pills at all if I'm on the shot.
I'm exhausted.

I'm so, so sorry you're exhausted, Boots. Makes sense, though.
Thank you for coming back. Seriously, a lot of people missed you very much.

[MuddyBoots]

Here's what the grass looks like in the morning. I went to the park for my run today and had to defrost the windshields for the first time since spring. The trees are all either brown or bare now.

My meds have me wiped out. I'm going to try and half the Seroquel tonight to see if I sleep less than 11 hours for once. It's weird waking up to daylight, especially this time of year.

Possible trigger:

Every time I purge I get a nosebleed that just doesn't stop (it's normal for me to have nosebleeds last 30+ minutes). If I drink or use opiates I will stop breathing because of the valium. I'm trying really hard to fill my days with healthier activities, but it feels weird. Like I don't deserve it. Like I should put up with nosebleeds and stop breathing.

[*Beth*]

Thank you for your pics @MuddyBoots. That grass looks beautiful. We will see frosty grass very, very early in the morning in late December-January. Except I have no grass around my apartment, which feels so odd.

Boots, I'm so sorry about everything else you're going though. The best thing i can say is that it is great that you run.

I hear you regarding Seroquel. Yes, it makes me sleep, but that's all I want to do, and then I feel depressed. What dose have you been taking?

[MuddyBoots]

Originally Posted by *Beth*

I hear you regarding Seroquel. Yes, it makes me sleep, but that's all I want to do, and then I feel depressed. What dose have you been taking?

100mg, I tried cutting it in half but I couldn't sleep on just 50 at all so 100mg it is.