[Mountaindewed]

After all the "I'll be here for you no matter what. I won't do what all the other therapists did. I am super protective of you" ********, I got an email from her saying she's not going to be in the office after next week and won't be doing remote after November 17 and then won't know when she'll return. She gave me a refferal to another therapist. But its like I don't even know how I feel right now. I get her pregnancy was probably a suprise but I just feel so, let down I guess. I just thought she was differen't then all the other therapists I had. But I guess at the end of the day, its just a job and she gets paid too. I don't know if I want to do therapy anymore though since its getting harder and harder to trust them.

[Soupe du jour]

I'm sorry to read that, Mountaindewed. I remember the frustration you had in the recent past with other therapists. It is unfair, indeed. However, you are correct that your therapist's personal life circumstances lead her to make unexpected decisions. Having to find any new service provider can be hard, but I think needing new therapists or psychiatrists is among the hardest. My hope for you is that after a number of bad luck situations, the next therapist will be a longer-lasting and more secure relationship for you. You do deserve that. But, such is life that situation upsets happen! All of us have them and continue to experience them, periodically, as long as we live.

You, yourself, recognized the progress you have made this past year. We have also noticed. I remember thinking that I would break down when I left my old psychiatrist in the US. But I have survived and even made great strides since. I found a good psychiatrist and therapist when I arrived in CZ. Now I recently moved far north and have to find new ones. It's OK.

[*Beth*]

Ohhhh, I am so sorry, Md! Wow, that seriously sucks. You have worked so hard to develop a solid relationship with the woman. I would never discourage anyone from being in therapy, but I'll tell you that for myself, I'm rapidly losing faith in the whole mental health system. Therapists are too often filled with their own issues, are unreliable and inconsistent. It can be devastating for the client.

And the medication providers don't seem to know WTH they're doing. Each one of them has a different idea of how to treat their patient.

Mental illness is so, so misunderstood. Lately I'm just feeling mistrustful of all of it.

[Mountaindewed]

She sent an email back which my mom is saying is a really nice response. She says I have every right to feel like this way. She wants to make this as smooth a transtition as possible and the last thing she wants is for me to go without mental health help. She says she anticipates being back in the office in August 2023.

Basically I'd just go without therapy. But I think I need therapy in order for some of my transition stuff to be paid for by my insurance. So I don't think I really have a choice. Just starting over yet again with someone is exhausting.

[Mountaindewed]

She is having pregnancy complications. My mom assumes its because of her age. I sent her an email apologizing for not understanding the situation, (even though I was not told of it in the first email) and that I'd be willing to work with this other therapist if I could go back to her when she comes back. I don't know if I overeacted or what. I have been very on edge lately and I knew something was going to push me off eventually.

[*Beth*]

I don't think you overreacted, no. I think your attitude is really good, Md! And yes, you definitely want to stay in therapy so your insurance will continue to cover your transition. Plus, I do believe that it's important for you to have a t to discuss things with.

I didn't mean to discourage you. I'm just at a point in my own life where I'm feeling frustrated with the lack of progress with regard to the treatment of mental illness since I was first in the system 40 years ago. What I mean is, I feel like I need something else at this point. But I'll be 60 in 2 months, so my situation is so different from yours.

When would you start seeing the new t?

[*Beth*]

And yeah - it's her age, most likely. I dunno. Medicine treats pregnancy like a disorder these days. Absolutely there are times when special precautions need to be taken. And I had c-sections because I definitely needed them. But now...they tell women (for example) not to do any gardening while pregnant because of toxoplasmosis & other stuff in the soil. I think that takes it way too far.

I was pregnant for the 3rd time at age 41 and when I went to my first OB appointment they handed me a stack of stuff to read about "geriatric pregnancy" - that was a seriously thick stack of paperwork. Don't do this, don't do that. I was so careful and did everything they told me to do/not do. I still lost the baby at 4 months. I suppose it was my age, but the father had fathered another baby years before and his wife lost that baby, also at 4 months. So it could have been something with the guy.

[Mountaindewed]

Originally Posted by *Beth*

I don't think you overreacted, no. I think your attitude is really good, Md! And yes, you definitely want to stay in therapy so your insurance will continue to cover your transition. Plus, I do believe that it's important for you to have a t to discuss things with.

I didn't mean to discourage you. I'm just at a point in my own life where I'm feeling frustrated with the lack of progress with regard to the treatment of mental illness since I was first in the system 40 years ago. What I mean is, I feel like I need something else at this point. But I'll be 60 in 2 months, so my situation is so different from yours.

When would you start seeing the new t?

You weren't discouraging me. I was in between therapists for a few months in 2019 when I was waiting for my transference T to have an open slot and I did fine on my own then. That wasn't almost a year though of waiting when I had other stuff going on that could cause issues if I werent in therapy.

I know what you mean about being frustrated with the mental health system. Since I moved I just haven't been able to find anyone.

I think I'll be starting with this new therapist after Thanksgiving.

[Fuzzybear]

I'm sorry MD. I hate it when people leave too

Two therapists have terminated me.

And I have ''trust issues''. I don't know if I could ever trust another therapist.

Without trust I don't think there is much ''point'' in paying nearly all our income to talk to a stranger