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Wisest Elder Ever
Member Since Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,331
(SuperPoster!)
21 81.2k hugs
given |
#61
You're not a horrible person!
I've been deleting some people on fb today... Units who say things like ''if that person knew basic high school chemistry, that person would know how wrong they are'' - they have to GO. Unlesss they are ignorable in our heads. Quote:
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Victoria'smom
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*Beth*, Victoria'smom
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catches the flowers
Member Since Jul 2019
Location: Downtown Vibes, California
Posts: 15,701
(SuperPoster!)
4 23.7k hugs
given |
#62
Quote:
Yes! They have to be the ones in the position of power. __________________ |
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Mountaindewed
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Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
Member Since Jul 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 22,450
(SuperPoster!)
12 12.7k hugs
given |
#63
Quote:
Hey girl ! Oh the joys of weight and psych meds. I recently lost 20 lbs and I did it by going Keto. I can’t do full on Keto everyday but it did help. Not sure how much I’ve lost now , it’s been a month since I weighted myself. I’m not going to fixate on the “ number” but now my clothes are fitting better . I like Keto because I can load up on proteins and veggies so I won’t feel hungry and deprived. I’m sure your holiday meal will be amazing this year! Hopefully your mom will get out and come for a bit! Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk __________________ Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
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BeyondtheRainbow, Nammu
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*Beth*
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Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
Member Since Jul 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 22,450
(SuperPoster!)
12 12.7k hugs
given |
#64
Quote:
I’m so sorry how’s the recovery going ? Feel better soon Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk __________________ Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
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BeyondtheRainbow
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Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
Member Since Jul 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 22,450
(SuperPoster!)
12 12.7k hugs
given |
#65
Quote:
Thanks ! I think most people would benefit from have a pet in no matter what shape size or species they are. I’m sorry things are tough right now. Do you have an idea when you can fully move into your new home? I’m sure that will be a huge help in your mental well being. Loads of hugs my friend Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk __________________ Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
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BeyondtheRainbow, Soupe du jour
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Nammu, Soupe du jour
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Where the sidewalk ends
Posts: 36,229
(SuperPoster!)
7 8,783 hugs
given |
#66
I feel like I am losing my ****ing mind and heading for a breakdown. I can't take anything. I'm going to run out early of my Geodon 20's. I'm 2 days short of my valium. I've taken my night meds and my melatonin. I've eaten dinner so I'm not hungry. There is nothing left for me to do at this point except wait it out and fall asleep. I don't get what is going on. Like do I have long Covid that is only affecting my mental health or what. But I feel so weird right now.
__________________ Ridin' with Biden |
*Beth*, BeyondtheRainbow, Soupe du jour
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Wisest Elder Ever
Member Since Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,331
(SuperPoster!)
21 81.2k hugs
given |
#67
Grrrr. Can't ****ing get away from THAT thing
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*Beth*, BeyondtheRainbow, bizi, Soupe du jour
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catches the flowers
Member Since Jul 2019
Location: Downtown Vibes, California
Posts: 15,701
(SuperPoster!)
4 23.7k hugs
given |
#68
''The highest form of knowledge is empathy, for it requires us to suspend our egos and live in another's world."
Plato How very true and thank you for this @Fuzzybear Yes, I know you are familiar with the demons @MuddyBoots, and I'm sorry that you are. Oh, I hate them, they are the indication to me that things have hit rock bottom. Time is a major aspect of how med prescribers handle an appointment, isn't it? If they would just push for even a full 1/2 hour instead of a rushed 20 minutes so much more could be accomplished in the long term. Therapists. HA. I've had one, many years ago, he worked through the VA (Veteran's Administration), came from the Bronx, he'd been in infantry, a platoon leader, in Vietnam. In the 6 years I was in therapy with him he never missed a single appointment. Not one. Nor did I - never. In August he took a 2-week vacation, only that. A reliable, empathetic, highly intelligent man. He worked a lot with Zen Buddhism before it had become "a thing." Solid. A good handshake at the end of each session. No games, no BS. I felt very secure in the military environment. Everything was done exactly on time, no surprises. This therapist I have now. Drippy with compassion, but true empathy? Not really, no. Terrible memory. So busy taking notes (why?). A verrry passive approach that leaves me feeling neither safe nor secure, more anxious than anything else. She misses literally every third session. Many times every other session, and seems entirely unaware of the problems her absences cause. The inconsistency is so unprofessional I honestly don't know how she retains her job. She gives wonderful hugs. That's her "great talent." If I wasn't seeing her at no cost and if I had the energy to start new I would definitely seek therapy elsewhere. Really, I would like to return to the VA, but therapy is in a different city now. Sorry, I really went off on therapy. Doctors, medical providers, therapists...far too many have a helluva nerve to be in practice. __________________ |
BeyondtheRainbow, Fuzzybear, Nammu, wildflowerchild25
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~Christina
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Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
Member Since Jul 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 22,450
(SuperPoster!)
12 12.7k hugs
given |
#69
Things are going okay with the new pup despite she’s a land shark at times. The joys of puppyhood parenting lol
Gus has gotten annoyed with Maddie off and on. He’s just setting her straight on whose the boss lol… she will learn quickly. Early this morning I heard guns going off all around us ….hunting season has started. Sirius use to panic if he heard more than 1 or 2 shots in a row. I took the dogs out and had a good cry leaning on the pasture gate in the freezing cold missing my Sirius. We had zero intention of getting another dog after we lost Sirius but finding yet another dumped puppy that’s black must have been Sirius sending us a baby in need. I’m sure most people think that sounds silly but this is how it feels to us. This depression is still holding on. It’s not massive but it’s enough to sadden me of course. I’m having to stay firmly in the present and tell myself 157 + times a day that I’ll be okay. I know it will pass eventually. Hope everyone’s weekend is going well Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk __________________ Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
*Beth*, BeyondtheRainbow, bizi, Fuzzybear, Nammu, Soupe du jour, wildflowerchild25
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*Beth*
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Crone
Member Since May 2010
Location: Some where between my inner mind and the solar system.
Posts: 71,406
(SuperPoster!)
13 53.7k hugs
given |
#70
Quote:
__________________ Nammu …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann |
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BeyondtheRainbow, bizi
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*Beth*, BeyondtheRainbow, ~Christina
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Crone
Member Since May 2010
Location: Some where between my inner mind and the solar system.
Posts: 71,406
(SuperPoster!)
13 53.7k hugs
given |
#71
Brrr it’s freezing here. Got colder as the day went on. It’s something like 14F with a wicked blowing wind that bites. So I’m assuming sub zero windshield temps. Was planning to go to Wally World to pick up a few things, but golly. Massive amounts of people and no parking anywhere. Decided on another day. Went to HyVee and picked out a cute evergreen planter with red bow and bright berries that I’ll put in the flower box with the two solar red birds after thanksgiving.
Also picked up the fixing for mulled wine. Gonna take that to thanksgiving too. Yesterday I thought I might be getting a cold after being outside but sleep took care of that. So far all indications are green for the thanksgiving dinner. As usual I’m bring my spicy green beans. Oh oy, I’m so done with the early darkness. 4 pm and I gotta turn all the lights on. __________________ Nammu …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann |
*Beth*, BeyondtheRainbow, bizi, Fuzzybear, Soupe du jour
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~Christina
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Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
Member Since Jul 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 22,450
(SuperPoster!)
12 12.7k hugs
given |
#72
Quote:
Ooooooooooo I just couldn’t handle the weather you have !! We get nasty cold here be it’s not the entire winter. Apparently there’s some kind of catapillar that does something that is indicating a cold winter.. Or some kind of leaf doing something too … now I don’t have a lots of faith in those kinds things. I’ll just trust my Weather guy LOL I loathe going to Hellmart but it’s a necessity sometimes. I bet the evergreen. Looks lovely. Mulled wine Oooo it’s been years. Have a glass or 3 for me Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk __________________ Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
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BeyondtheRainbow, bizi, Nammu
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*Beth*, Nammu
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Elder
Member Since Mar 2013
Location: NJ
Posts: 6,434
11 9,563 hugs
given |
#73
Quote:
__________________ Of course it is happening inside your head. But why on earth should that mean that it is not real? -Albus Dumbledore That’s life. If nothing else, that is life. It’s real. Sometimes it f—-ing hurts. But it’s sort of all we have. -Garden State |
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BeyondtheRainbow, bizi, Nammu
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Blue_Bird
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Crone
Member Since May 2010
Location: Some where between my inner mind and the solar system.
Posts: 71,406
(SuperPoster!)
13 53.7k hugs
given |
#74
A word about metformin. I lost no weight on it but it did mess up my digestive system. I started having gag reflux when eating. If I laid down shortly after eating I’d throw up. Stopped the metformin and the problem went away. It’s not a magic pill for everyone.
__________________ Nammu …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann |
bizi, Soupe du jour, wildflowerchild25
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BeyondtheRainbow, Blue_Bird, Soupe du jour, wildflowerchild25
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Legendary
Member Since Apr 2012
Location: Earth
Posts: 14,908
(SuperPoster!)
12 5,443 hugs
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#75
I want to cry, and cry, and cry. Found out we gave the last of our money to miguel When he has enough for the next couple of months he is just worried not having XXXX in his account. I feel weird asking him for the money back. But we still have people we are missing gifts for. I found where I could get my meds for $50 and his for $25. Maybe just ask for $50 back? So I can get my medication I'm just hurt he took our last dollar when he still had. He decided not to go back to school. Which means he needs a way to get money. I want to get settled so we can all go back to therapy and pdocs. IDk I'm just annoyed, I want to SH but it'll only make things worse.
__________________ Dx: Me- SzA Husband- Bipolar 1 Daughter- mood disorder+ Comfortable broken and happy "So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk My blog |
*Beth*, BeyondtheRainbow, bizi, Soupe du jour, wildflowerchild25
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~Christina
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Wise Elder
Member Since Apr 2015
Location: US
Posts: 9,233
(SuperPoster!)
9 9,387 hugs
given |
#76
I'm home! My Abbycat is starting to belive it's real. (I live across the driveway from my mom so I go back and forth between the 2 houses when I'm pet sitting.
The fish did not die on my watch! I'm suddenly feeling anxiety about my biopsy, which is on the 29th. I'm still ok with it and know it's just a little procedure and I may feel a little bad for a day or two for no reason anyone can come up with. For whatever reason I feel rather sure that I'll be having another surgical biopsy. I'm even ok with that. What I'm anxious about is just the waiting. First I wait another 10 days and then another few days (can't remember how many) for pathology. That time between test and result is rough and now that I have the pre-cancerous cell history it will be that much harder. I'm hoping to be able to pick up my Emsam that day and keep worrying about the logistics of that. (Same hospital, connected but separate buildings somewhat far apart). We use valet parking because it is actually cheaper so I think when my biopsy is over I'll have to walk over to my pdoc's building and then back to the building where my test is. Not sure what else to do. I just hope I feel well enough. I may wind up driving up this week to get the Emsam when it arrives (if it arrives) but I'd really rather avoid a 5 hour trip if I can. One thing at a time... It's ok. I will be fine. I can touch a chicken. (I'm scared of birds). I can do this too. __________________ Bipolar 1, PTSD, GAD, OCD. Clozapine 250 mg, Emsam 12 mg/day patch, topamax 25 mg, ,Gabapentin 1700 mg & 100-2 PRN,. 1.5 mg clonazepam., 50 mg Seroquel |
*Beth*, bizi, Blue_Bird, Nammu, Soupe du jour
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*Beth*, ~Christina
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Elder
Member Since Jun 2015
Location: Czechia
Posts: 5,154
8 13.4k hugs
given |
#77
We got our first snows of the season the day before yesterday and last night. Not a lot, but it was still nice to see. Today I have the house to myself for much of the day, as Hubby is meeting his friend at our new property.
I've had several doctors appointments lately and all kinds of things seem wrong with me. I fear I might have or be close to having diabetes type 2. The GP ordered further testing. My thyroid functioning is low again, so I'm now taking my Synthroid the way I'm SUPPOSED to, despite it working out OK for years. I had 14 days of non-stop period, but I think it's finally stopped, but only because my new gynecologist prescribed a hormone medication. I have to go back for the pap smear. I've had longer ones up to 23 days in the past (and irregularities for a few years) and am not yet dead, so I assume it isn't anything THAT bad. I don't know what's wrong. I think something more than just ovarian cysts, which I've had for years. He told me to go for a mammogram soon, but I don't expect any problem with that. She won't prescribe my Synthroid, but is rather sending me to an endocrinologist. Hassle! She also wants me to see a nephrologist again, because of my kidney functioning. Hopefully nothing worse is up than the usual. I also need to see an ENT, as my hearing has been poor for a while, and worsened this past week. It's clearly an issue I've had several times in the past. Hopefully the ENT can do what past ones did, which brings immediate relief, and lasts usually for three years. I've also had GI issues for a long while. Hopefully they are more stress-related than anything. Maybe IBS? Who knows! My first psychiatrist appointment isn't until early February. I do not yet have a therapist. Hubby has also been referred to other doctors and ordered to get more tests. I just hate having all of these doctors. It's overwhelming! I'm also notably depressed, surely because of countless stressors. I've been hiding in bed or on the couch under comforters. Yesterday my stomach was upset, I think because of the hormone pills, but today it seems better. I've called my brother much more often than in the past. It is what it is. He's fighting. He still voices that I need not come. I don't feel psychologically ready. Yet, about a month ago my nephew sent me an email begging me to. I responded that "it's not yet the right time", but that I will come when it is. I haven't heard from him since. It may all seem unbelievable, I know. I'm just hoping a lot of my (and Hubby's) medical issues aren't nearly as concerning as I fear. That the sun will come out (it was foggy for several days until yesterday) and much of it will be gone. I try to cope by meditating on "nothingness/void" (śūnyatā), in the meantime, like Buddhists. I don't write/say anything about my woes to anyone in my family other than my husband. They have even worse things going on. But if I do get diagnosed with diabetes, I'll ask my sister for advice. She has it and is now controlling it quite well. __________________ Dx: Bipolar type 1 Psych Medications: * Tegretol XR (carbamazepine ER) 800 mg * Lamictal (lamotrigine) 150 mg * Seroquel XR (quetiapine ER) 600 mg I also take meds for blood pressure, cholesterol, and tachycardia. Last edited by Soupe du jour; Nov 20, 2022 at 04:57 AM.. |
*Beth*, Blue_Bird, Nammu, wildflowerchild25
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Nammu, ~Christina
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Elder
Member Since Mar 2013
Location: NJ
Posts: 6,434
11 9,563 hugs
given |
#78
Quote:
I don’t necessarily want to lose weight just with a med but I want to be less hungry so I can lose weight with diet and exercise like I did before. Thank you for sharing your experience, I really appreciate it. __________________ Of course it is happening inside your head. But why on earth should that mean that it is not real? -Albus Dumbledore That’s life. If nothing else, that is life. It’s real. Sometimes it f—-ing hurts. But it’s sort of all we have. -Garden State |
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Nammu
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Nammu
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jun 2013
Location: Hogwarts
Posts: 36,745
(SuperPoster!)
10 14.3k hugs
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#79
Quote:
I didn’t mean to insinuate that it’s a magic pill for everyone. I’m sorry if it came across that way. Just sharing my experience with it because I struggled with losing weight for a long time due to APs and it helped me. The first time I was on it I had to get off it though because I was on too high of a dose (1,000mg) and it was making me throw up and get low blood sugar symptoms but I’m back on it at 500mg half the dose I was on and am doing well with no issues. I know everything works differently for everyone Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk __________________ R.I.P mom 8/6/55-1/15/16 “All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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Nammu
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Nammu
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Member
Member Since Mar 2013
Posts: 443
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#80
Quote:
Yep I second the mashed potato…. Also pasta salad coz the pasta was really soft and cold…. just got to avoid the hard bits of carrot etc but there’s not much of that and they’re easy to avoid. |
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*Beth*
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