Bipolar Check-in #75

I agree with you that to pick one in the family to be an executor of the will is not a good idea! Sorry to hear about all the stress this gives you!

@raspberrytorte Hope the healing goes quick!

I’m
Already stressing about school.
I have a hard year ahead of me. This time next year I will
Be finishing my masters of social work and preparing for the cSw exam.

My fiancé is doing his last few weeks of msw
Right now. I’m beyond proud! He was once homeless, mentally unwell and an
Alcoholic. Now he’s gonna be a social worker
Helping peers! He’s already been offered a position.

Our wedding planning has been paused bc we’re
Both so busy right now.

I overslept and felt very tired. Despite of that I was able to finish my morning routine. After that I was troubled by too many thoughts. You know when you want to stay focused and you are not able to get your mind back on track. After some failed trying I decided to go off my ordinary plan and to do my work (online). I was able to focus on that, but now, afterward I feel sad and very tired

I suppose it is some old hurt that is lying there and pressing my buttons. So it is, even the best plan cannot always be of help. To me it is the diabetes as well as other physical plagues that I have to handle as well. Diabetes can sometimes give an enormous tiredness together with problems to remember there and then. When it is that way, people who don't know me well, can get the idea that I have cognitive problems. In some way that is right, but only for the moment, not as a permanent state of being. Sometimes there is nothing else to do then to accept that it is the way it is ... That's my problem this evening (to accept). I am so tired of all these physical illnesses!

Wow @HALLIEBETH87 You have come far and there is much work for you to do in the next semester. I'm sure you will make it.

Sure you are proud of your fiancé! He has done well.

A boquet of flowers for both of you!

My gynecolgist won't get back to me. I've called twice. Both times the receptionist has been like "yeah I'll get ahold of her and call you back." I know I'm a dude with a vagina which may freak them out a bit, but I'm still a patient they should be treating with respect.

Anyways now all I can do is just watch what I eat, eat small meals, not eat before bed, and stay on top of my pain meds. Today I did pretty good.

I had a quiet day. I tried to go out but the heat was unbearable and i turned back. I picked up again with a ZOOM support group as i expect i will be hiding from the heat for a while. I had considered buying a bus pass this month as i went out so much last month, but now i'm glad i didn't. I haven't had any punishing boredom, so that's been nice.

Hope everyone is doing as well as possible under the circumstances.

My mom is making me power of attorney over her due to a surgery she is having. It feels weird not having my older sister in charge.

I'm writing a novel too and just passed the 40,000 mark so nearly halfway through. Whereabouts are you? I did have an outline but just rough. Let's support each other and check in. I have my goal on the nanowrimo site if you want to join - it's all free. It's Camp Nanowrimo right now, but my goal is to finish by early September

Good morning! I am sure I will have success with my six weeks program. Some days are really hard because of physical diseases, so I have no hope of becoming a problem free person, but to live much better with my depression and life in general.

I have been able before to free myself from depression by doing "things" in ways usually working well for me, step by step. To do so I need to be free of unnecessary distractions.

I will take a break from the forum from now on. I will probably come in and say "hello" from time to time.

I send my best wishes for the general health of everyone!

Sending hugs to everyone here. I'm sorry I can't respond to some posts individually right now. Hopefully in a couple days I'll be back on track, in that respect. I'm struggling.

Today I have my first therapy since September 2022. It is through an online therapy provider BetterHelp. In addition to once per week "live" therapy, they provide any day texting exchanges through the website portal. I like this feature, and so far my impression is good, but the "live" interaction will be more of a decider on whether we click. The session will be at 3 pm, CEST (Central European Summer Time).

A few days ago, our friend gave us about 1.5 kg of dark sweet cherries from his tree. Then yesterday, our neighbor coerced us into picking and taking about 1.5 kg of a slightly different variety from his. I've already made several things with them and froze some. Yet, I still have 1.5 kg left. I own a small pitter, but it only does four at a time. I'll make more things and freeze more, too.

Luckily in Czech Republic the weather has not been particularly hot, like in much of the US. However, we've had a bit of a drought. When it does rain, it's only briefly. This coming week will be hotter, though. Unlike most in CZ, we have air conditioning in our house. People scoffed at us having it installed, but we'll be the happier for it.

I hope your therapy goes well and is a good fit for you.

Best wishes to you.

I have therapy in a bit and I really don't want to do it. But if I quit therapy my medicare and SSI will be cut and I need that more for my medical stuff now instead of my mental health. So I'll just have to deal with it today.

I had to take Gary to the vet. I dropped him off this morning. He needs a lion cut since he refuses to let us groom him. He won't allow anyone to and it gets so bad he has to be put under sedation. He looks pretty ugly when hes done but hes not all clumpy and I'm sure he feels better. Justs adds on another $300 to my bills. Then I have to take my orange guy in on Tuesday for an annual checkup. Luckily I got the 3 year shots for them so it shouldn't be too much for him.

I feel a depression coming on. I compare this feeling to getting caught in undertow at the beach. I feel myself being sucked out to sea. I've got to use the tools I have to fight depression and get back on the beach. I know that if I don't find ways to keep going, I'll be dead in the water. Bipolar disorder sucks. Up until a week, or so ago I was riding high. I don't understand.

I hope all of you who are troubled at the moment can enjoy some joy soon.

H wants me to go back to school for computer science just an Associate's degree. And eventually get a remote job. In honestly I'm not doing good without a purpose. I haven't colored or really got out of bed in 7 months except for dinner or occasional Dr appointment. I can't say I'm depressed. He wants to get a gym membership for an indoor pool. But has to be inclusive for Miguel. So it has to be community center. So it takes more digging into gym's history. I don't know it's like without mood swings I'm just a blob. Don't really want to interact. I still hate where I live and we need money to move to a handicap friendly place of our own. It feels like there's no point. I get a job I loss SSI, medical, and my medication which I obviously need. There's no homeschool groups around. So that's not an outlet we have. We've thought about moving back but we can't it's unfortunately not safe. So here is home now and I have to find my way.

Two good things happened today: i got to make an amends that's been weighing on me and the heat broke!

I hope everyone is doing as well as possible under the circumstances.

Had a pretty good day! Anxiety wasn’t too
High.

Found where they haven’t applied my Voc rehab voucher to my tuition acct at school. Very glad I caught that bc it’s enough to cover all my semester of books and $2k toward tuition!

I’ve been feeling bugs crawling on me the last few days but haven’t told anyone but y’all.

Had my partners folks over for lunch at our new place for the first time since we moved. I’m so glad that it went well and what I cooked wasn’t half bad if I do say so myself! Thai coconut turkey meatball soup (it’s winter here in Australia).

Totally not looking forward to going back to work on Monday. I hate teaching at the school where I’m at but now that I live a 6 minute slow walk around the corner from where I work, I won’t be applying anywhere else anytime soon ….