[purplebutterfly]

I feel like everyone is tired of my **** and no one really cares, don't take me wrong I know many of you out there do care, but have you ever felt at times that no one cares how you feel. Maybe I am feeling this way because I feel like giving up on me. I feel like my Pdoc is giving up on me too, it's like I am too much to handle.

[RozG]

((Purplebutterfly)) has your pdoc called back yet?

[purplebutterfly]

yes, she is going to do some research and get back with me, i guess in a way i assume she would just know how to treat me, i guess i am just feeling really low and with the urge of cutting going on as well i feel like i have no one, im sorry i do not know how else to say it other than i am so deeply depressed and i feel like i do not have any way out of this pain other than (SI). Im sorry I do not know who I really am anymore, or even if i really knew who i was.

[RozG]

while you're waiting on her to get back to you...are you still taking your meds?

please hang in there and don't SI...you may not realize it atm but you're worth more than that!

[purplebutterfly]

I didn't take my afternoon meds, I was going to then I decided not to. I know its bad when I stop taking meds, this isn't the first time I've done this I do this alot, because nothing seems to work, and I usually take the meds for a couple of weeks then the dr usually switches meds on me and tells me to stop taking the old ones and start the new ones, so i really have never been told how to taper meds off, cuz apparently my pdoc doesn't care. thanks for being here to help me thru this, and the meds do not let me sleep good either so i feel like its useless for me to take them if i can not sleep and they dont help me either

[RozG]

can i ask what meds your pdoc currently has you on? some members here may have more advice for you than me if they know what meds you're currently on. sorry i'm new to meds so not much help.

[purplebutterfly]

I take prozac twice a day and compazine(it's a older drug) I have taken zoloft,celexa, effexor, remeron, just to name a few and zyprexa, depokote and now compazine, plus numerous other anti anxiety meds

[RelientK]

As a patient, you do have the right to make treatment requests...especially if your current treatment isn't working.

For medicine - Why don't you give Lithium a try?

For other - A daytime outpatient group therapy program can be useful. Sometimes it can be a little touchy-feely, but overall it is worth the time you put in.

Purple, I have seen you struggle for quite some time here. I really think you should take control. This is with you for life so you gotta learn how to deal with it properly ASAP.

I have faith in you - RK

[Conquistador]

I have felt exactly like that and in hindsight it was really a reflection of how I was feeling about myself. I wasn't founded in reality at the time. Most likely, for myself, it was biochemical.