[jack_holden]

Just had another tearful session with my bipolar wife, who says between sobs that she doesn't feel the unqualified love she needs -- from me, from our daughter, from anybody. I tell her I love her but it's not enough. I'm not a terribly nurturing type, but I do love her in my way and we've been married 26 years. I also feel irritation sometimes, and lots of guilt. This disease his thrashing her, and so I also feel pity. Thanks for listening.

[Berries]

I have been living a diagnosed mental illness for 25 years. So, I don't know how it feels to be "normal" and have a bipolar significant other.
But I do know, that even when I am complaining or asking for more support, it doesn't mean I don't appreciate what I have or love my significant any less.
I also know that I can be a little manipulative and tend to bait the ones who love me. Sometimes, I need a limit or boundary set. If it is done very thoughtfully, gently and if my imput is considered in making that limit, it can be a very good thing for both of us.
I hope that is helpful.

[madisgram]

hi jack, i'm sorry you are feeling down. i wonder if a session with your wife's therapist would help? he/she can't discuss your wife specifically but can perhaps help you get thru this rough spot about your frustrations, etc. i am bipolar and i'm sure there are times i can drive my grown son up a wall. you of course know it's not intentional on your wife's part but i strongly suggest a mental health outlet for yourself too. sometimes we just need to vent. pc is another good place for venting so glad you wrote a post re this.
also some days i take a "mental health day", as i call it...everyone should try it, bipolar or not...and just do things to ease the tension in my life or just be incredibly kind to myself for a day...

[CleverClover7]

Hello, Jack. I'm terribly sorry you are going through this with your wife. It must be hard to be the one that is there for someone with a mental illness. I've been diagnosed with Bipolar I so I can't imagine what it's like on the other end. One thing I DO know is that it cannot be easy. Sometimes I myself wonder how I'm to put up with myself.
My husband also goes through a lot of the problems with me. Luckily for me, he doesn't hold most of it against me. He understands, and has even researched the disorder, for me. I, myself, haven't been diagnosed all that long ago and I'm still learning how to live with it. I was put on medication and it made me a zombie. I wouldn't want my worst enemy to live like that.
Point is...it's a hard thing to go through and see. Especially with someone you love like your wife. To hear her say she doesn't feel loved may not be anything that's in the slightest your fault. It could be her disorder talking. In my mind I know my husband loves me but at other times I can't grasp it. It's hard to explain.
I hope all goes well and you and your wife get past this. Good luck, Jack and take care. God bless you and your wife.