[little*rhino]

ty for being so nice to me guys... i appreciate it.

i'm ready to pop a gasket. You all might want to duck for cover. i'm not mad at anyone in this forum, so no worries.

i have had to listen, TWICE in as many days to some blow hard tell me how my illness is a fad. Fantastic. The first was just dense as my MIL's xmas fruitcake (ironically)... just ignorant i guess, under-informed. Funny how those who know so little seem to say so much. He basically made a comment about how bipolar disorder sure was a popular thing to have nowadays. @#!%^!$!!... oh yes, so popular, like a guchi bag.

the second person was more aggressive and twice as ignorant... had a bad experience, got diagnosed and has decided it was wrong, etc etc etc. Good health to him really... hope he is right and his docs were wrong. WHy? Becuase this illness is a **** of a thing to have.

i'm thinking "fantastic, how about just keeping your crack medical knowledge to yourself?"

just because a doctor gives ME a wrong diagnosis, doesn't mean that EVERYONE with that diagnosis has also been diagnosed wrong. That's narcissistic to think that one person is more right that all the doctors and people who do legitimately have it. Sure there has been more media coverage and with it there will always be a rise in the misdiagnosis problem. Always.. with every disease. Some doctors are lazy, some are academically smart but otherwise stupid and some are just plain crooked. Just like any other demographic. It does not mean that every doctor is wrong, lying or an idiot. To say so or even think so is paranoia.

i spent 3 yrs on that river in egypt too... med-free and did great.. then it creeped back and bit me. Not every bipolar person must be on meds life long and anyone can decide to risk it and some will be ok, some won't be.

i'm just really super sick to death of people making their own experience be representative of everyone else's. YES, share... tell me or anyone your own story, but tell it like it is, as it happened with you and not as you now determine it applies to the whole world.

there might be a lot of people faking bipolar disorder... doesn't make mine fake. There might be a lot of people so messed up in so many other ways that they grasp anything as an answer... doesn't make that problem apply to my illness. There are.. and i know some personally.. people who try to help themselves in some warped way by researching disorders and deciding they have bipolar disorder because it sort of fits and it sounds better than cyclothemia or hormone issues, or something less media-glamourized... doesn't make my bipolar disorder any less real. There really are people who are seeking an excuse for their life or behaviour... and this illness becomes that excuse... but most of them are doing sub/unconsciously and telling them they are won't help them at all.

people can find healing or peace or health in many ways... not everyone will agree... but THINK before you open your cake-hole... there are real people who suffer and they struggle day to day with their own problems... try not to pass on your own fears and ignorance because they do not need it.

i'm sorry.. i had to rant.

[Moose72]

Hey- rant away! My boyfriend still disagrees with me that I am bipolar. We've had more than one discussion about this. He figures since I'm not like his first wife- who he says was at least manic and gave examples of- then I am not bipolar. End of story. So we went round and round and amongst the conversation and he wouldn't hear about the symptoms etc. since he "read all about that". He said that my hearing voices was actually spirits ... I laughed out loud at him. I told him that I feel completely stupid, if this is the case, since I have therefore spent 3 years talking about an illness and taking meds for an illness and gaining WAY too much weight from the meds... for nothing!

[phlashback]

Agreed, you have every right to rant!

I to have encountered many people that think they are helping by denying the existence of the disorder (anything mental health realted for that matter). I too thought that it was a load of garbage, and then things got worse for me. My denial was due to being in the middle of the illness. At that point in my life I did not know about the family that had been hospitalized...

I have had people who argued up and down that there was nothing wrong with me, and that I was "making it up". If I was making it up, why was I out of control. I mean I just loved sitting in a room staring at the walls listening to voices tell me to end it all. The paranoia that I was the center of an ivestigation or a plot (leading me to only leave the house for work). I also adored getting the collection calls because I could not pay the bills I had reacked up (and no recolection of doing so). The substance abuse, the self loathing. I could go on and on.

I would like nothing more than to rid myself of my diagnosis. I wished beyond all hope that I was not bipolar. I want nothing but to be "normal". But I must live in the real world, where there is no denying the fact.

If I am not one of the many living with this disorder, then why do I identify with all that I have talked to. Why does the medication help. Why would my doctor's try so hard to not make that diagnosis... looking for anythig else that could be the problem (as something is wrong).

If only there were a test that could prove or disprove the disorder. But we are not there yet. Keep strong, I share your plight (tho we each have our own specifics).

You are among friends here, so rant away! You are just saying what many of us feel.

[madisgram]

amen to your rant, ((candika)). i'm bipolar and have found it helps me to protect that info from others cause so many people have no idea what they're talking about nor do they care! for those of us that suffer or have suffered from BPD we know it's no stretch of the imagination. so i got out of the the debating society and only share with people i really , really trust or that may benefit from my dx... like someone who may be undx'ed but would benefit from an evaluation from a pdoc.
sorry those people got you upset...now the real trick is letting it go so it doesn't ruin your day.

[little*rhino]

oh wow... i thought people were going to be pissed at me for posting that. i was so mad... and i just dont get mad that often.

the thick-headedness was maddening.... i just cannot fathom how anyone could decide that their situation applies to a whole demographic... on any issue. Who gives me the right to tell others what is right or wrong? It really belittled my experiences and invalidated the struggle i face... so wrong oon so many levels.

you're right.. no point in debating it but i get like a pitbull on a pork chop and i just cannot back down. It's my history of course... to stand my ground and refuse to give some jerk the right to talk to me or about me (directly or indirectly) that way. Grrrrrrr

that's a good point... why do the meds help if it's all bogus? why is it that the same predictable mood patterns happen when i am not taking care of myself (with or without meds)? i am a walking textbook case of bipolar II. But geez... guess my pdoc with his 30yrs experience and all the medical text books and my relatives who also have it... i guess we are all wrong... it has to be wrong because some jack *** on the internet who got midiagnosed said it was wrong. Oops, my bad.

i just cant let someone run at the mouth about the illness when there are other people present. Some of them are often struggling to come to terms with dibilitating symptoms, illnesses or meds. The last thing they need is someone to introduce a large dose of doubt and fear. People come to get information and to feel accepted... they seek understanding and comfort... not to hear someone blather about how we are all clueless fools duped by an obvious fad. Funny... i dont feel trendy.

Now my bipolar illness will go the way of neon socks and big hair.

anyone have some other weak excuse i can use for all my symptoms now? bipolar is soooo passe.

[Michah]

Good on you Candika. I don't really care whether I have bipolar or not. I take my lithium......it helps. I have good shrinks.....they help. I don't really care what people think. As long as I am honourable, then I have no regrets. Without sounding irreverant, bipolar is part of my skills base. The experience teaches me things I would otherwise not have learn't.

I have lived with BPD and schizoeffective for 15 years. One more diagnosis, adds to the wealth of information that I already have. Not saying it is a walk in the park. I have suffered extreme terror and lost much........but gained much as well.

I wear my diagnosis as a badge of honour......it is part of my battle.....my battalion......no-one elses.

[perpetuallysad]

I'd really like to understand why on earth anyone would want to pretend they were BP and how they pretend it? My god, the things I would give to go through a day with a brain that wasn't like this...I just cannot imagine just saying it and pretending it for the sake of...well I don't know for the sake of what because I've only told 2 people in my life I have BP, the first one said "No way, you're not that crazy"...isn't that nice? That's why I don't tell people anything about me. I just stay at my house and hope that no one is going to try to intrude here.; that's when I get scared as hell.