[*Defeated*]

I am at a loss as to how to handle an immense amount of despair that I fell after just leaving therapy. I just had the "deepest" session that I ever have and I should feel great about that. That I was finally able to open up even the lightest. I may feel the lowest I felt in a long time. This post is probably useless; no way in hell I can remotely describe the feeling to create a truly empathetic understanding.

[lynn P.]

(((*Defeated*))) - I'm very sorry you're feeling great despair. On a positive note, when a person does hard work in therapy to uncover intense pain, this eventually results in healing. Its natural when we share something extremely difficult, that it triggers us, almost (sometimes exactly) as it did in the past.

You deserve a pat on the back for working hard even though its painful. Be gentle and take of yourself during this time of despair. I hope and pray as time goes on and therapy progresses, it will get easier.

[*Defeated*]

Thanks Lynn. I am feeling better. I just got home after taking a final exam which apparently took my mind away from what I was feeling. Not so sure how I did on the exam though!

Thank you for your encouraging response.

[LaLuuz]

Good job on your exam. I learned something from you by reading your post. Y ou feel better...after you went and took an exam at school. Like, somehow I need to find a way togive myself to constructive stuff instead of my hurt when it starts to consume me. Which is on a daily basis. I guess I'm thinking out loud. My bad. In any case, thank you for being open about your struggle *Defeated*. It made me think about being conscious of the need to seek out active movements towards healthiness when I start to get weird. That means a lot to me.

[*Defeated*]

LaLuuz, I am glad that I was of some help to you or at least offered you a little insight. I felt really bad earlier and even though the exam was an additional source of anxiety for me, it was much more pleasant than the previous feeling. I sat in front of my exam for about thirty minutes, flipping thru it, turning it over, dissociating, staring into space, picking up my pencil, clicking it on the table, dissociating, staring in to space, stand up, walk out, splash water on my face, breathe ... in and out of here and there for what seemed like forever. My classmates were starting to finish their exams and I'm still oh, I don't know, just writing my d*** name. WTF?! There is no telling what my professor is gonna find within the pages of that test! Hope she gets a good laugh!!

[DreamerInState]

Originally Posted by *Defeated*

I am at a loss as to how to handle an immense amount of despair that I fell after just leaving therapy. I just had the "deepest" session that I ever have and I should feel great about that. That I was finally able to open up even the lightest. I may feel the lowest I felt in a long time. This post is probably useless; no way in hell I can remotely describe the feeling to create a truly empathetic understanding.

I've felt that all the time when I went to therapy it was odd once all antsy and happy then suddenly utter poop no indescribable yeah it was :/