[Starvin4Perfection]

I just finished this book on BPD today. I was talking to my boyfriend and asked how he handles living with a bipolar girlfriend that also has BPD and he told me I didn't have it, it was all in my mind... wtf is that? I've been diagnosed by a psychiatrist and I clearly have the symptoms I just manage it pretty well. How insulting is that?

[shezbut]

He's determined to keep his head stuck in the sand, like an ostrich. Doesn't help anyone, of course, it just simply denies that there are any problems to begin with. Foolish, if you ask me.

[3little.birds]

honestly i would go through the DSM IV symptoms with him and ask him to objectively give his opinion if you qqualify or not... like actually go through all the symptoms with him and decide yes or no for each, and tallly the end score.

I did that with my BF. when he decided that i qualify more than necessary, he was more enthusiastic in looking up more information on BPD with me (I would also recommend looking up some prior websites that actually are good in describing how bpd effects you, for him to be able to relate better how you are, and how it fits with the diagnosis.

idk if anyof that made sense. sorry if this was a wastge of ur time..

[3little.birds]

My BF.. also who has been very supportive in the past had decided that i make my illness worzse by obsessing over it. just throwing that out there.

[FacingChains]

Same here!!!! MORE INVALIDATION.......makes me even more insane!!! My friends and family say, "There's nothing wrong with you!!!!!" I feel like I am going crazy when I talk to them.

[Starvin4Perfection]

Thanks for the feedback all. It's very frustrating that he wants to deny it. I talked to him yesterday again and told him how frustrating he was and he said I just handle myself really well so it's hard to agree with it. I will say in his defense that I manage my disorder really well; I've found a really good formula for my medication and a lot of relationship therapy has helped me deal. I still have my struggles though, especially with abandonment. Then he tells me I'm not strong enough because I fall apart when he leaves me (he's a pilot) and it's not fair because I know it's the disorder. I think if he really believed me he'd understand why leaving is hard for me and he'd stop telling me I'm not strong enough!

Originally Posted by Starvin4Perfection

I just finished this book on BPD today. I was talking to my boyfriend and asked how he handles living with a bipolar girlfriend that also has BPD and he told me I didn't have it, it was all in my mind... wtf is that? I've been diagnosed by a psychiatrist and I clearly have the symptoms I just manage it pretty well. How insulting is that?

it's called damage control of the despicable kind from loved ones that have selfish agendas.....**** this guy off!...deal with it early....it hurts that people we are attracted to lack essential emotioanal qualities....

piss this dude off.....

meaningless arsehole

their minds are on other things

useless..

[kitten2012]

Maybe talking about mental illness is more of a best friend thing than a significant other thing. I can see how it would be hard for him to admit to you that there's something "wrong" with you. That said, wanting to feel validated and not having your needs met is super frustrating.

[Girl_Interrupted]

Lol I'd dump him if that was me. I don't have people in my life who refuse to even accept mental illness. They don't have to understand it, just accept that it exists. That's all I need.

God I'm drunk. Must've spent like 4 minutes writing this kept making typos xD

Or, those who believe that the fully expressive paragraph with perfect sentence structure, grammar, and spelling you just created clearly shows that you couldn't possibly have any kind of mental disorder. Has there ever been an illness to plague mankind that was more maddening for the afflicted ?

he actually said 'its all in youir head'? - ummmm actually yes, or brain to be more specific! -

how awful for you to be invalidated like that

HUGS