[dmliddicoat16]

At first I thought I may be Bipolar, but I am coming to realize I more likely have a Borderline Personality Disorder. It fits, almost 100 percent. It depresses the hell out of me, but in order to help myself get better I need to know what I should do now. What steps should I take? How do I get diagnosed? Treatment types? Any information will help me.

[powertools321]

Originally Posted by dmliddicoat16

At first I thought I may be Bipolar, but I am coming to realize I more likely have a Borderline Personality Disorder. It fits, almost 100 percent. It depresses the hell out of me, but in order to help myself get better I need to know what I should do now. What steps should I take? How do I get diagnosed? Treatment types? Any information will help me.

Welcome, Hi, Howdy. I would find a Dr. or Therapist to talk to, you can explain your concerns, what you are going thru and what you think may be the problem. Focus on the symptoms more than the labels, after all it's really the symptoms that get in the way. If you believe it is indeed BPD then I would strongly recommend that you find a Dr. or T that treats people with BPD, if not it's kinda like going to see a gardner for a pluming issue. There are a few types of treatment with the main one being DBT, this was specifically developed for people with BPD. You also have CBT and a couple of others that I can't think of right now, but definitely look for someone who understands DBT and has experience using it if you get diagnosed with BPD. Try not to get too depressed with it because recent studies have shown while it is resistant to change the success rate for an improved lifestyle is very good, so there is hope. You wanting to get help and get better is a HUGE first step, there are a lot of people out there who just don't want to admit it or flat out have no idea, so you are already on your way.

[missbelle]

Please don't self diagnose.......Find a therapist first and express your concerns

[MDDBPDPTSD]

It would all start with the professionals. Go to a psychiatrist and a therapist. The psychiatrist is the one who would diagnose you, so when you see him/her, have your facts ready and let him/her not only hear why you think you have BPD, but let them see what symptoms you have. You might do that by telling them a story from your life that illustrates the symptom you are describing. Like if you are describing black and white thinking, Explain to the psychiatrist (pdoc) how last week you thought that your Aunt Margaret was the greatest woman on the planet. You thought this because she had always been so helpful and kind to the entire family. This week, you think Aunt Margaret is the worst person on the planet because you just found out that she neglected your cousin by not buying him/her name brand cereal as a child. Obviously, this story is false, but have a real one from your life to tell the pdoc, for each symptom.

In terms of depression, uh yeah. If you have BPD, long before you find out you have it, you will much experience with depression. TONS. And yes, finding out you have it can be depressing in and of itself. It is a tough disease to fight and a tough disease to fight. Estimates are that it kills about 13% of us.

It is also hard to live with, because many of us have trouble finding motivation to live. And even when we do, our coping skills are not that great, so our lives are usually of a lower quality than folks without this disease.

We have more trouble establishing relationships and much more trouble maintaining them. We tend to either put folks on a pedastel or beneath out feet. And we can change their position in a matter of minutes. In addition, our own wild mood swings and possessive insecure attitudes can push others away. When they leave us, it is like the end of the world.

Fear of rejection is an overriding factor behind much of our behavior. We do anything and everything to avoid it. And sometimes, we just get fed up with fighting the (as we see it) inevitable coming rejection, and we push the person out of our life before they can leave.

So, BPDers can die from the disease, or they can live and try to fight it, or they can live and allow the disease to determine their everyday life.

Many folks who try to fight it, use various method of treatment. Most use some form of medication and find it helpful, but not all they need. That leaves therapy. There are various types of therapy available. Among those that are largely reported to help are :

Dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT) more info on that can be found :

http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/
Most folks take DBT classes and go to therapy. There are online groups that also offer DBT support and they are peer led.

I will add more types of therapy later. Have to go now. Hope some of this helps. God bless.

Originally Posted by MDDBPDPTSD

Dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT) more info on that can be found :

http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/
Most folks take DBT classes and go to therapy. There are online groups that also offer DBT support and they are peer led.

I will add more types of therapy later. Have to go now. Hope some of this helps. God bless.

Yahoo also has a free DBT class at http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/dbtclass/. If you are having problems controlling your emotions, it would help regardless of whether you have BPD or not.

Oh, and if you are going to go the therapist route, do your research and attempt to find one that is familiar with or specializes in BPD. A lot of "specialists" will not work with BPD patients, will not diagnose you as BPD, and basically believe that you cannot be helped. You may also want to check with your insurance before going too far as well. A lot of insurance companies won't cover BPD treatment.

[dmliddicoat16]

Originally Posted by missbelle

Please don't self diagnose.......Find a therapist first and express your concerns

I'm not self diagnosing, just trying to get an idea of what I may be going through, and asking other's as well. I see no self diagnosing in my posts. I will be sure not to, thanks.

[dmliddicoat16]

Originally Posted by MDDBPDPTSD

It would all start with the professionals. Go to a psychiatrist and a therapist. The psychiatrist is the one who would diagnose you, so when you see him/her, have your facts ready and let him/her not only hear why you think you have BPD, but let them see what symptoms you have. You might do that by telling them a story from your life that illustrates the symptom you are describing. Like if you are describing black and white thinking, Explain to the psychiatrist (pdoc) how last week you thought that your Aunt Margaret was the greatest woman on the planet. You thought this because she had always been so helpful and kind to the entire family. This week, you think Aunt Margaret is the worst person on the planet because you just found out that she neglected your cousin by not buying him/her name brand cereal as a child. Obviously, this story is false, but have a real one from your life to tell the pdoc, for each symptom.

In terms of depression, uh yeah. If you have BPD, long before you find out you have it, you will much experience with depression. TONS. And yes, finding out you have it can be depressing in and of itself. It is a tough disease to fight and a tough disease to fight. Estimates are that it kills about 13% of us.

It is also hard to live with, because many of us have trouble finding motivation to live. And even when we do, our coping skills are not that great, so our lives are usually of a lower quality than folks without this disease.

We have more trouble establishing relationships and much more trouble maintaining them. We tend to either put folks on a pedastel or beneath out feet. And we can change their position in a matter of minutes. In addition, our own wild mood swings and possessive insecure attitudes can push others away. When they leave us, it is like the end of the world.

Fear of rejection is an overriding factor behind much of our behavior. We do anything and everything to avoid it. And sometimes, we just get fed up with fighting the (as we see it) inevitable coming rejection, and we push the person out of our life before they can leave.

So, BPDers can die from the disease, or they can live and try to fight it, or they can live and allow the disease to determine their everyday life.

Many folks who try to fight it, use various method of treatment. Most use some form of medication and find it helpful, but not all they need. That leaves therapy. There are various types of therapy available. Among those that are largely reported to help are :

Dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT) more info on that can be found :

http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/
Most folks take DBT classes and go to therapy. There are online groups that also offer DBT support and they are peer led.

I will add more types of therapy later. Have to go now. Hope some of this helps. God bless.

Thanks for the site, it's excellent. And also thanks for your advise, and further explaining the disorder to me. It's definitely depressing to come sit here and analyze my behavior. Idk if I have any particular condition at all even, but just today my bf said some things that made me for the first time consider I may have an emotional disorder. He said, "It's literally seems like a switch goes off, and then you're a different person. It's not the person I fell in love with. So I just have to wait it out and wait for you to come back to me." He's not saying I literally change personalities, he's saying that my child-like rage, my depression spurts, my irritation and tearfulness etc is not how me (inside) really is. My emotion roller coaster isn't the only thing that leads me to suspect BPD, however. But a work the other day I flipped out on my coworkers for no reason, yelling and screaming and hitting things. I made my dad's life hell with my mood swings, and lost my best friend in high school and many boy friends (tho typically I'd randomly fall out of love w/ them). This and other reasons are why I want to get to the bottom of this.

[dmliddicoat16]

Originally Posted by MDDBPDPTSD

It would all start with the professionals. Go to a psychiatrist and a therapist. The psychiatrist is the one who would diagnose you, so when you see him/her, have your facts ready and let him/her not only hear why you think you have BPD, but let them see what symptoms you have. You might do that by telling them a story from your life that illustrates the symptom you are describing. Like if you are describing black and white thinking, Explain to the psychiatrist (pdoc) how last week you thought that your Aunt Margaret was the greatest woman on the planet. You thought this because she had always been so helpful and kind to the entire family. This week, you think Aunt Margaret is the worst person on the planet because you just found out that she neglected your cousin by not buying him/her name brand cereal as a child. Obviously, this story is false, but have a real one from your life to tell the pdoc, for each symptom.

In terms of depression, uh yeah. If you have BPD, long before you find out you have it, you will much experience with depression. TONS. And yes, finding out you have it can be depressing in and of itself. It is a tough disease to fight and a tough disease to fight. Estimates are that it kills about 13% of us.

It is also hard to live with, because many of us have trouble finding motivation to live. And even when we do, our coping skills are not that great, so our lives are usually of a lower quality than folks without this disease.

We have more trouble establishing relationships and much more trouble maintaining them. We tend to either put folks on a pedastel or beneath out feet. And we can change their position in a matter of minutes. In addition, our own wild mood swings and possessive insecure attitudes can push others away. When they leave us, it is like the end of the world.

Fear of rejection is an overriding factor behind much of our behavior. We do anything and everything to avoid it. And sometimes, we just get fed up with fighting the (as we see it) inevitable coming rejection, and we push the person out of our life before they can leave.

So, BPDers can die from the disease, or they can live and try to fight it, or they can live and allow the disease to determine their everyday life.

Many folks who try to fight it, use various method of treatment. Most use some form of medication and find it helpful, but not all they need. That leaves therapy. There are various types of therapy available. Among those that are largely reported to help are :

Dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT) more info on that can be found :

http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/
Most folks take DBT classes and go to therapy. There are online groups that also offer DBT support and they are peer led.

I will add more types of therapy later. Have to go now. Hope some of this helps. God bless.

Thanks for the site, it's excellent. And also thanks for your advise, and further explaining the disorder to me. It's definitely depressing to come sit here and analyze my behavior. Idk if I have any particular condition at all even, but just a week ago my bf said some things that made me for the first time consider I may have an emotional disorder. He said, "It's literally seems like a switch goes off, and then you're a different person. It's not the person I fell in love with. So I just have to wait it out and wait for you to come back to me." He's not saying I literally change personalities, he's saying that my child-like rage, my depression spurts, my irritation and tearfulness etc is not how me (inside) really is. My emotion roller coaster isn't the only thing that leads me to suspect BPD, however. But a work the other day I flipped out on my coworkers for no reason, yelling and screaming and hitting things. I made my dad's life hell with my mood swings, and lost my best friend in high school and many boy friends (tho typically I'd randomly fall out of love w/ them). This and other reasons are why I want to get to the bottom of this.

Hey dcoat,

In fact, a lot of people here are 'self-diagnosed' mainly because their Therapists refused to put the big red streak on their file labelling them as a 'Borderline'. I also suggest not to look too deeply into the label of this disorder.

From my understanding and experience with BPD ,it is a cause of repeated childhood trauma/ invalidation which has manifest into our 'personality' as a lack of coping skills mainly regarding emotions. Somewhere our developmental stages went a little haywire and it's our job now to rewire them.

Please also be very wary and conscientious in reading about this disorder, as it is extremely stigmatized. Despite a mainstream misconception, there are recovery options and they are successful.

Here is what I do, a very do-it-yourself approach:
-This book has been a godsend: http://www.amazon.com/Dialectical-Be...s=dbt+workbook I supplement learning from it by keeping a journal along with my successes and thoughts. I do exactly what it says I should be doing, whether I feel like it or not (which is mostly the latter).
-This site has been extremely helpful: www.dbtselfhelp.com
-There is a DBT skills chat on Saturdays at 1pm EST on Psych Central here (go up to the chat tab at the top to access it, start in the 'Lobby' click the door and move to the room) You can ask questions and discuss DBT.
-These forums have been a godsend: knowing I wasn't alone in this has helped tremendously, as well as advice, validation, support and getting to know one another as best we can along the way.
-I practice mindfulness meditation DAILY (mostly drawing from Buddhist resources). Here are some audio guided meditations I use: www.audiodharma.org
-There is also a free DBT class via yahoo (mara has the link up there).

Despite my own persistence in therapy (of many kinds: psychologists, pdocs, CBT, regular counsellors) I have yet to have anyone even suggest or hint that I have BPD. Many therapists can't diagnose this disorder, and even if they do they don't know proper ways of treating it (they may also refuse to treat you). The 'big red streak' on your psych eval could cause more problems down the road...So I definitely suggest finding someone who knows about BPD and specializes in it or enrolling in a DBT class on your own volition (DBT has been shown effective for more than just BPD, including anxiety, irritability, PTSD and general stress).

Keep coming back here, reading posts and responding.
Best wishes and