aggressive therapist + guilty about therapy

I tried a new DBT therapist. The day of our 2nd appointment I was totally feeling crummy and couldn't bring myself to go, since I knew doing the session would put me in a really down mood and I was already struggling with a poor mood, plus my fibro was bothering me. So I had to call that afternoon and cancel.

But the therapist seemed kind of aggressive towards me. 'Do you REALLY want therapy? Are you being ambivalent now?' I felt interrogated though they said shortly after, 'I'm not trying to bully you' etc... It freaked me. The ambivalence comment made me feel like I was literally in Girl, Interrupted. :'I

Whenever I can't bring myself to do therapy like this, I get guilty... feel like I've failed myself and the counselor for not being able to go. But when I'm in certain moods I just can't go. And this therapist just doesn't seem safe to me. She scares me even - saying something like that to me. BPD traits make me really sensitive and that upset me.

Has anyone else ever experienced this with an aggressive therapist, or feeling guilty from therapy?

I have many many times.

Carol

Sounds pretty nasty. Therapists shoukd be more understanding.

Havig said that, the amount off times ive had therapists say im 'voting with my feet' by not going and do i no longer want their services etc etc. So it is quite common unfortunately.

I have this real thing, im quite an impulsive person at the best off times but at times in ridiculously impulsive and could probably say or do pretty much anything. So i avoid therapy like the plague when im like this whih has always blatently pissed off my therapist and in a way i can kinda see why but that doesnt make it right for them to say thing like that. I think what they mean is its not gonna work if u dont try, but i do understand there are days ita better NOT to go to therapy, clearly a lot off therapists dobt!!

Who knows maybe i should go to therapy in **** moods, id get a shed load iff stuff off my chest probably as.i rarely have the guts normally. But then i might not be able to walk out jnto the real world after. If i do, i might not be able to face my T the next week. Its a risk. Maybe my T needs to see that side iff me though, to understand, doesnt mean i want her to though.

Sorry turned into a massive rant but there you go!!

I think it's a tightrope for a therapist to walk on with BPD. Knowing that BPD clients can be, at times, resistant to therapy, they are faced with the hard decisions on how to handle it and I am sure some are aggressive about it (which for me, would be completely ineffective as it tends to make me dig my heels in more than giving in) and others probably try to be more persuasive about it. Either way I think what most are trying to do is get their clients/patients in the office for therapy since they can't help them without sessions.