[Ultra Darkness]

I constantly check the Who's Online page. I spend a lot of time looking at people's profiles to find all their threads. I repeatedly check the same people's profiles to track their threads. I'm starting to feel paranoid about my own actions, and I have no idea why I'm doing all this!

I do that too. >.<

Not on here though.

[spondiferous]

Are they people who mean something to you personally? ie. someone you're attracted to, someone you're angry with? Or is it just random people?
I would just ask yourself these questions. Try to find out why you're doing it, what need of yours isn't being met. Maybe instead of 'stalking' you could try to strike up a conversation with someone? That might help if you are, say, feeling excluded or lonely. Just my two cents.

[Ultra Darkness]

Originally Posted by spondiferous

Are they people who mean something to you personally? ie. someone you're attracted to, someone you're angry with? Or is it just random people?
I would just ask yourself these questions. Try to find out why you're doing it, what need of yours isn't being met. Maybe instead of 'stalking' you could try to strike up a conversation with someone? That might help if you are, say, feeling excluded or lonely. Just my two cents.

When I'm seeing who's online, I usually want to see what my friends are doing (and which ones are even on). I do follow a couple people's threads because I'm concerned about them and want to keep up with what's happening.
But I also "trail after" a couple people just because they interest me. It's especially embarrassing with some of the junior members who haven't had many page views, and everyone can see (or suspect) that most of those views have come from a single person.
I am seriously freaking myself out!

I don't think it really matters. It's kind of like being a Facebook stalker, you know? And everyone is a Facebook stalker.

Maybe it's just to help you feel closer to the people you talk to online. I wouldn't necessarily consider your actions real and true stalking, not unless you start sitting outside of people's homes at 3am. You're fine.

[spondiferous]

Agreed.
It is a social forum. Unless you're crossing boundaries in terms of inappropriate messaging, trying to find out personal information about them so you can stalk them in real life, that kind of thing, I wouldn't worry too much about it. But if you're interested...why not chat them up? It never hurts to say hi...

pffft everyone's a stalker at heart. been one since i was very young.

I do this all the time. I'm always checking who's on and respond to their threads.

Dear Ultra Darkness,

What you are being, has a name...Curious. It is a very common attribute of human nature to be curious as to the lives and interests of others. Why do you think that the paparazzi risk life, and limb to get shots of the famous? They know if they can get the right picture they will be paid well by any number of cheeky magazines,who in turn will turn the pockets of a hungry public, who will stand suckling on the tales of others lives they, themselves, more than likely will not ever experience.

Why do these "rag-mags" sell so well?" The same question can be asked of reality T.V. programs. This type of show has survived far longer than I ever would have imagined the public would find interesting, but no, the trend continues, today. The public devours shows of 'average', and 'not so average' lives, to catch glimpses of the "problems," many quite contrived, but regardless, the 'problems' with which others struggle to solve, and the way in which they solve them.

I often check to see who's online. I like to know who's "in house." It is like a party. Would you arrive and move immediately to sit into a chair with eyes closed, waiting to see who approached you, or would you grab a soda, and mingle into the crowd looking to see who was there?

There are certain people here that I really enjoy reading, and I like to check where they have been, and how they may have responded to a particular issue.

Some I just enjoy reading, for the sheer fun of it, either because I find them to be masters of wit and word, or because I find some completely of their rocker (this is said in kindness, for I have no malice in the statement) and I get a "giggle and a whoop-whoop" reading those with whom I have little or nothing in common with, for I find their responses to be both humorous, and hubristic.

There are also many times when I see someone is online, whom I do not know, but have been wanting to meet, and this is how I meet them. There is no one around to introduce us properly, so it must be done in this way.

Lastly, I want to know which of my friends are within this sanctuary at any particular time. I have a few people that i really consider quite good friends, and if they are on, I am going to be sure to toss a quick, "How you doin' ?" their way.

Ultra Darkness, as long as you are not attempting to extract private information, so that you may seek these people out in RL, then what you are doing is no more maladjusted then anyone who's ever spoken of their desire, out loud, or silently, to be the proverbial "fly on the wall."

Besides, this is a open forum, and all who 'play' here know that they are posting publicly.

Passionately perusing, people,

-Fleeing Bellocq

[BrokenNBeautiful]

done this, too.

It's not stalking. It's being interested in people.

maybe it's love. Oh, g*d, I can't believe I said that! lol (not romantic love, just supportive love) genuine authentic human love and caring.

my bpd voice is continually telling me I have nothing good for ppl. That's the bpd.

Carol

[MissLadyRed]

I do this too and I have always been like that in other social medias etc (and in the real world too unfortunately) I understand your concern but I think you're fine and as most people here have said, we all do it! I'm a curious cat by nature too and I think in this community we are all a bit like that, just to see who's around, read about their lives, form some sort of connection, etc. I don't think you have to worry, but I know my BPD makes me super paranoid at times. Besides, I have some stalker stories I could tell you that would make you feel better.

[TheRealFDeal]

OK, I feel like I'm missing out on something. Where do I find the Who's Online page? I'm sure it's right in front of me, but I'm such a goober I can't see it.

Go to the top left and hover over the box that says "Forums" and there will be a box that drops down. "Who's online" is at the bottom of the drop-down box.

Don't worry, I had to look for it as well. I forgot.

it's also at the bottom of the page when you're in the forum but not in a thread, i think.

[Ultra Darkness]

Heh. Well, everyone is certainly safe from me. Even if I wanted to stalk anyone, I'd need to get out of town first! (starts cursing lack of transportation)