[beautifulfreak]

Hey everyone, ye have all been so amazing and helpful. We all know BPD comes with so many co-morbidities, such as depression, self harm, eating disorders etc etc

Well, I went into another forum for a bit of support around one of these and received comments that were hurtful to me.

Love and hugs to everyone I have met and for the friends I have made.

I wish you would stay... I like you being here. But I understand if you want to go. We're always here for you, though.

[beautifulfreak]

Well, I came here for support, because I have tried everything else.

Thank you so much for replying. That in itself, means a lot…

[beautifulfreak]

I should amend that…I have gotten great support from BPD…and from social groups etc…I actually even enjoyed interacting and talking about things I like…

I can so relate to the previous thread re the fixers…that is precisely what happened me in another forum.

[beautifulfreak]

Crikey, I'm in a bit of a bind now…don't know what to do…I'm in a different timezone to most and feel awful to just log out…

Originally Posted by beautifulfreak

Well, I came here for support, because I have tried everything else.

Thank you so much for replying. That in itself, means a lot…

No matter where you go, you're going to run in to insensitive jerks, nothing is perfect. I hope you decide to give it another chance. I know it's hurtful; I've been hurt a number of times here, but you're not going to find a better on-line support forum. I was told this by someone here the last time I was hurt and I put in to leave: "Show them that they can't chase you away, that you belong here, that you're better than they are."

Just a thought...I hope I didn't make anything worse. I have a fear of hurting people, and it wasn't my intention.... Take a break, regroup, and if you decide to rejoin us, we'll be here. Take care.

Originally Posted by beautifulfreak

Hey everyone, ye have all been so amazing and helpful. We all know BPD comes with so many co-morbidities, such as depression, self harm, eating disorders etc etc

Well, I went into another forum for a bit of support around one of these and received comments that were hurtful to me.

Love and hugs to everyone I have met and for the friends I have made.

I don't think we have spoken yet, I have had my ups and downs here too, It is best to ignore those that you feel are hurting or are having a go at you.

I really hope that you change your mind

[beautifulfreak]

I'm probably being totally irrational and not thinking logically. I don't know. You have not offended me at all.

I am not on any other site like facebook or twitter or any of those things…I thought here would be a place for me.

Now, I sound so self-pitiful. I apologise. Thank you

[beautifulfreak]

Thanks to you too buttercup. Thank you

[Travelinglady]

Dear one, did you report the hurtful comments to a moderator by clicking on that icon in the message? (I sure hope I haven't said anything here to hurt somebody--and if I do, I'd like someone to report me!)

As a community liaison here at PC, I'd find it very helpful if you could at least PM me and let me know what was said, even if you don't want to say who said it. We try to do our best to make PC a safe and helpful place, but, of course, we can't control what some folks with mental problems might say. If we know, then maybe we can at least make it less likely that someone else could be hurt. Also, remember that you can block receiving posts from hurtful people.

We don't want you to leave. Maybe at least you can keep in touch with your friends here!

I've been hurt here before as well. Hurting people sometimes lash out and hurt other people and there are a lot of hurting people on PC. I've had people lash out at me on threads, in chat, and I've lashed out at people myself, though I'm not proud to admit it. This is a safe place in that you will always find people with whom you can identify and what is said here stays here, but just as in real life there may be people who are going to lash out and say stupid things. Best thing to do is try to have grace (even though it's difficult because you are hurting as well) and try to think of how angry/hurt inside they must be to say such things to another person. It isn't easy, but sometimes it helps a little. Then come back to the BPD forum and talk to us.

I hope I haven't made you feel worse; I'm really trying to help because I want you to stay!

[greyclouds]

Originally Posted by beautifulfreak

Thanks to you too buttercup. Thank you

Me and buttercup became friends in here after exchanging some pretty mean words.
We were both in a bad place and things were miss read.
Now she is one of my good friends in here and great support.

Don't let one thing or even 3 take you away from the support you get in here or your friends.

[Ultra Darkness]

I had the same thing happen just a few weeks ago. I spent three or four days arguing with someone. Then we figured out we weren't helping anyone, I apologized (I was more or less the one who started it), we started pm'ing, and now we're friends!

[cboxpalace]

Originally Posted by beautifulfreak

Hey everyone, ye have all been so amazing and helpful. We all know BPD comes with so many co-morbidities, such as depression, self harm, eating disorders etc etc

Well, I went into another forum for a bit of support around one of these and received comments that were hurtful to me.

Love and hugs to everyone I have met and for the friends I have made.

OK....Where to start...I found what I believe to be the thread that you were offended by, and my opinion is that neither person had the INTENT to hurt you. The CONTENT of what was said was something to take into consideration. The TONE of how it came across was a bit to the point. Regardless, I don't think their intent was to hurt you and even if it was, it would still be unwise of you to give 1 person that much power over you when there have been MANY who have helped you.

You stood up for yourself, and explained how it made you feel which is good. I don't believe the intent of that person was to hurt you, and a good possibility they may have misunderstood what you needed from the title of the thread. Be open to the possibility of misunderstanding rather than maliciousness.

[MissLadyRed]

Oh no I'll be sad to see you go. I liked chatting with you and getting to know you. I hope you change your mind and stick around. I understand we can get offended by others. Ive felt my self at times but then remind myself that we are all in the same boat and we all have bad days, so I'm trying not to take anything personally. (Easier sad than done for us BPDers) Sending hugs.

[beautifulfreak]

cboxpalace hello there, nice to meet you…thanks for what you said about giving someone else the power. In hindsight I realise that.

However, I would like to clarify that I never once mentioned the word 'malicious'. I didn't say the people hurt me…the 'comments' hurt me.

I have been supported and guided through this by Community Liaison as I only joined the Community this month so I am still finding my feet as best I can.

Thanks once again for your reply.

I would like to put it all behind me now. Thank you.

[beautifulfreak]

Thanks to everyone for their replies and comforting to know that these things have happened to others and they were able to move on from it.

So, I am going to try my best to move on from this too.

Thanks everyone. Still wish we were in similar timezones but I haven't found a magic wand for that yet…or the money for a plane ticket.

[beautifulfreak]

That was meant for after the last sentence…silly me…still pressing wrong buttons oh something!

[beautifulfreak]

I mean the wink was meant for after the last sentence…I'm shattered this morning

[imaginationunlimitd]

once my junior in college said to me,'everyone knows that u r a lunatic.'
i was so sad cause he told it in front of my gf.
but now often when i think of it i know its just experience,its not good or bad.it hurt a lot then but not now.
i healed from that.but there is something new now!
dont be sad..time really heals..love n hug..

Originally Posted by greyclouds

Me and buttercup became friends in here after exchanging some pretty mean words.
We were both in a bad place and things were miss read.
Now she is one of my good friends in here and great support.

Don't let one thing or even 3 take you away from the support you get in here or your friends.

This is very true we did clash at first, Now we are good friends

I am glad that you have decided to stay

[BeautifullyDeprived]

I too have felt like that when I posted a thread on the forum. Some people will come across as insensitive, I hope what they said wasn't anything that I wouldn't like to hear. I'm sorry you have to go, I hope you reconsider. Everybody understands each other, at least from my perspective, so we're like a big family.