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Folder icon 4) You know you are Borderline when...

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  #551  
Old Aug 31, 2013, 03:47 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tohelpafriend View Post
spondaneous reply: I agree, but in reality also people can turn on us thus from certain vulnerabilities I react with.....b & w thinking again..."if they can show that side, deal that hand", I totally reject you. I think it is a boundary somehow for borderlines, defense mechanisms for not getting hurt....we (I) can sometimes be overly harsh in our judgments of what people are capable of doing but hey fighting back and resisting is more empowering than passivity. One can forgive and still fight. I reject all people who have intentionally hurt me...I don't judge them, no need to...what they've done
to be will be done to them, and that goes for my treatment of others which is what I'd rather focus on...how can I make this person's journey lighter.....without needing validation from anyone...just I'm here for you.
I agree.....we are masters of defense and past events. I am trying to focus on what you said, actually, but the last few weeks I'm just trying to hang on. Actually thinking of writing a letter to my mom letting her know I forgive her....
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  #552  
Old Aug 31, 2013, 09:40 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Maranara View Post
I agree.....we are masters of defense and past events. I am trying to focus on what you said, actually, but the last few weeks I'm just trying to hang on. Actually thinking of writing a letter to my mom letting her know I forgive her....
Hi - that is a positive thing to do.....forgiveness releases us.....i try to instantly forgive and not review the past.......it's over......a betrayal for me is forgivable, but just ends the connection. here's a book title which helped me alot....."Reinventing Your Life", by Dr. Jeffrey Young. "Masters of defense and past events".......i bet many borderlines can agree with that.....hang in there....change always happens......as surely as night follows day......Peace,
and I appreciate your reply, Maranara. "help..............................."
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  #553  
Old Sep 01, 2013, 05:13 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tohelpafriend View Post
Hi - that is a positive thing to do.....forgiveness releases us.....i try to instantly forgive and not review the past.......it's over......a betrayal for me is forgivable, but just ends the connection. here's a book title which helped me alot....."Reinventing Your Life", by Dr. Jeffrey Young. "Masters of defense and past events".......i bet many borderlines can agree with that.....hang in there....change always happens......as surely as night follows day......Peace,
and I appreciate your reply, Maranara. "help..............................."
A good short book on this is The Art of Forgiveness, Lovingkindness, and Peace by Jack Kornfield. He tries to teach, among othe things, that you forgive yourself. We are always harder on ourselves than anyone else could possibly be.
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  #554  
Old Sep 01, 2013, 05:14 PM
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When you know what you need to do to help a situation and make it better, but your heart seems to think it knows better and always screws it up.....
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  #555  
Old Sep 01, 2013, 05:26 PM
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Originally Posted by Maranara View Post
When you know what you need to do to help a situation and make it better, but your heart seems to think it knows better and always screws it up.....
Listen to your mind and instincts...sometimes the heart is selfish
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4) You know you are Borderline when...
  #556  
Old Sep 01, 2013, 05:31 PM
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Originally Posted by allme View Post
Listen to your mind and instincts...sometimes the heart is selfish
Mind, sure...it's usually right. Not certain about the instincts. I am very impulsive and my instinct sides with my emotion most of the time.
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  #557  
Old Sep 01, 2013, 10:45 PM
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When you're not sure who you're going to see in the mirror when you wake up, cause every day you feel like a different person.
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  #558  
Old Sep 02, 2013, 08:53 AM
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When you are in that "self-destructive" mode and you find therapy (DBT/CBT) too boring and decide to get drunk instead >.>
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  #559  
Old Sep 02, 2013, 08:55 AM
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Originally Posted by Altinak View Post
When you are in that "self-destructive" mode and you find therapy (DBT/CBT) too boring and decide to get drunk instead >.>
Oh no Sorry things are so rough right now....I know it sucks to hear it but it will pass. Now I will apologise for sounding like a parent but try and go easy on the liquor...it may just make you worse
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’’In the end, it’s not going to matter how many breaths you took, but how many moments took your breath away’’

4) You know you are Borderline when...
  #560  
Old Sep 02, 2013, 12:16 PM
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When you're dead-set determined to do something, but when the time comes to do it....you feel you can put it off just a little longer....sigh. Story of my life.
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  #561  
Old Sep 02, 2013, 12:17 PM
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Originally Posted by Altinak View Post
When you are in that "self-destructive" mode and you find therapy (DBT/CBT) too boring and decide to get drunk instead >.>
LOL...I've DONE that! So sad, I know....but I definitely get it.
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  #562  
Old Sep 02, 2013, 01:44 PM
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When you are in that "self-destructive" mode and you find therapy (DBT/CBT) too boring and decide to get drunk instead >.>
Oh yes, too many times!
  #563  
Old Sep 02, 2013, 02:13 PM
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Originally Posted by Altinak View Post
When you are in that "self-destructive" mode and you find therapy (DBT/CBT) too boring and decide to get drunk instead >.>
been there, done that, 2 years sober now. I highly recommend it.
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  #564  
Old Sep 02, 2013, 11:07 PM
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When things start to look up in your life and all you can do is worry about how you're going to mess it up anyway.
This happens to me all the time.... I can see the silver lining in what I have and what is coming, yet somehow I still know I'm going to be the one to screw it all up...
  #565  
Old Sep 03, 2013, 07:54 AM
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When you make new friends and you suddenly start hating them as soon as you get home.
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  #566  
Old Sep 03, 2013, 10:43 AM
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when Rachel (the author of Get Me Out of Here) was looking at her report after being released from the hospital, she got so upset about what that report said about her that she told her pdoc, "Why don't you just write "a__hole" on this..."

And I feel this way a lot, too.

thanks,

Carol
Do you have other book suggestions?
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  #567  
Old Sep 03, 2013, 11:03 AM
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You crash in an instant. Bloody people getting to me again, why can't they just GO AWAY!
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4) You know you are Borderline when...
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  #568  
Old Sep 03, 2013, 11:28 AM
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You don't get called on in class and are convinced your TA wants you to fail
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  #569  
Old Sep 03, 2013, 02:01 PM
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Originally Posted by Luvmydog View Post
...someone says the cliche, "It was like banging my head against the wall," and you wince, because the last time you did that, it hurt.
Oh how true this is!!
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  #570  
Old Sep 03, 2013, 03:56 PM
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you're convinced you're socially inept and when you try to prove yourself wrong you only reaffirm it...
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  #571  
Old Sep 05, 2013, 12:44 AM
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.....when you are already in a lot of debt and you want escape reality by getting into more debt....
....when you feel guilty for gaining some weight back, so you try to make yourself feel better by over-eating some more
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  #572  
Old Sep 05, 2013, 12:45 AM
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you're convinced you're socially inept and when you try to prove yourself wrong you only reaffirm it...
me too
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  #573  
Old Sep 05, 2013, 07:55 AM
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Trippin2.0 Trippin2.0 is offline
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When you're an affection *****...

Thats me, not so much attention,but rather specifically affection. I want him to lavish me with affectionate words and actions, night and day. I will push every button I know to make it happen.

Ugh, there should be a puke face emoticon, I disgust myself at times.
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  #574  
Old Sep 05, 2013, 01:25 PM
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Originally Posted by lil-angel-wings View Post
When you feel like, "I'm not mentally ill, I simply am an emotional person and have empathy for everyone and everything, and life is just a roller coaster ride. I'm just more sensetive then others. Right?"
As a recently (re)diagnosed borderline-I didn't believe the first Doc because he gave me such a quick and shallow interview-I thought I was just more empathic than most people due to years of abuse at the hands of my alcoholic father and boyfriend. What was bad about feeling for others? it made me a better EMT and nurses' aide, and a good mom and great foster mom. But having those nerves so close to the surface has led to Fibromyalgia as well. How many of you have Fibro, if you don't mind me asking? This is my very first post....am I allowed to ask these things?
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  #575  
Old Sep 05, 2013, 02:24 PM
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When you listen to the song "Hard to Love" by Lee Brice, and you just get terribly angry because how could he describe you so well, but then leave out the part that you aren't really loved, because you were the one who f***ed it up??!
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