[AnnaBegins]

I had something good happen to me for a change - landed a big promotion at work. My email has been full of congratulations for two days and my new boss sent me a note saying his email has been equally full and that I should be very proud of my accomplishments to date.

But, the nicer people are to me about this, the more upset I get. I feel like the world's biggest fraud and know that it's only a matter of time before I get exposed and they all see me for what I really am.

Has this ever happened to anyone else? I'm almost in tears and my stomach is in knots because people are being nice to me. Not sure how to cope with this one...

[jadedbutterfly]

I have major issues when things are going well.... It's like I cannot accept it.... I do this with most things/people. It seems I am most comfortable when there is drama going on that shows my negative side to others.
I think its part of being a borderline... can't trust the good. can't believe there's anything good about you. waiting for the other shoe to drop.. for the fallout to come.
I hope that you can find a way to be pleased with yourself for the promotion. Try to focus on you.. never mind what other people are saying/doing..
One thing that I find is to try to brush it off... and I mean literally, put one of your arms out and sweep the opposite hand from shoulder to fingers and away, repeat on the other side ... until you feel some relief.. breathing exercises, such as counting your breath "In 1, Out 1, In 2, out 2..." do till 10, and then go backwards... this might help with the knot in your tummy

[AnnaBegins]

The other shoe dropped...should have known it was only a matter of time. A co-worker who I thought was my friend as well is going around the office gossiping about me, twisting things I told her in confidence to put me in a negative light. Rationally, I think she's jealous because she has been there a lot longer than me and her career is dead in the water. I also blew up her theory that my new boss doesn't like/respect women and therefore no woman will ever do well career-wise under him. But, trust is broken - trigger. Yesterday, her and the rest of the group on our floor went out for a birthday luncheon and my team was not invited; we saw them because they went to the same restaurant we picked for a random lunch out of the office. Rejection - trigger. I took the day off today - really want to cancel my therapy session and spend the whole day buried under a mound of blankets in bed where it's safe.

At least this pain is familiar...I was so stupid to believe that anything good could happen in my life without a price. I feel like I'm being punished for even telling anyone about it, which is only what I deserve.

[Altinak]

After being off work for 9 months, I finally went back. All of a sudden my parents and the people that I speak to started to really congratulate me and every day would ask me how I am getting on and I started to get more and more frustrated.

Part of this for me, I don't know if it would be the same for you, is that to me going back to work is just that... It's just going back to work.. And although I can see that it is major progress from a few months ago, I don't necessarily feel it? I shrug it off, not important, it just is. It's how I view a lot of things. I'm not sure if this is so much contributed to borderline, but it's possible that it is.

It also probably feeds into the suffocation aspect of BPD, a few congrats its nice but when everybody is on you, and the full attention focused around you, all you want to do is push back kind of thing.

Hope this helped x3