[megmeg9]

I feel like there is no way out. It's getting worse again. 10 days ago my therapist took me off Quetiapine because my liver is damaged from all the medication. And I am just completely lost. My mood is getting worse every day. Today I realized it may be because of those medication I can not take anymore.

I do not know if I am splitting. But I hate everyone. And I hate everything. I don't know what to do. I isolated myself from everyone because I just can't socialize. Today I didn't go to uni/college. I just couldn't. I stayed in bed all day. I can't get up. It hasn't been this bad in a long time. I'm having serious suicidal thoughts again. I hate life.
My psychiatrist isn't answering my calls so I called some random psychologist today and she said to come tommorow whenever I have time. I'm scared of that appointment. I am falling apart. I don't even feel love towards my boyfriend anymore. I can't do this anymore. I hate BPD.

What do I do to survive???

[Nammu]

Have you tried long term DBT treatments. That’s supposed to be the gold standard for BPD and has the added benefits of being drug free. It’s usually a 2 year process.

[jeremiahgirl]

Have you used supplements to help when other meds maybe affecting your body. Milk Thistle is good for cleaning the liver; it may help detoxing the other meds. Milk Thistle is an herb which can be found at most vitamin stores.
Also there Kava-Kava which is an anti anxiety herb it helps with calming the stresses of life.
It helps when one can to use herbs instead of the harsh medicines today. I can understand your stresses esp when associated with BPD I’m presently struggling and using some DBT skills to help me.
I hope the new psychologist can assist you.

[megmeg9]

Originally Posted by Nammu

Have you tried long term DBT treatments. That’s supposed to be the gold standard for BPD and has the added benefits of being drug free. It’s usually a 2 year process.

Oh no, I've never heard of it. I have been doing cognitive-bihevioral therapy (CBT) for three years now but it never really helped me. Thank you so much for your reply, I will ask my therapist about DBT

[megmeg9]

Originally Posted by jeremiahgirl

Have you used supplements to help when other meds maybe affecting your body. Milk Thistle is good for cleaning the liver; it may help detoxing the other meds. Milk Thistle is an herb which can be found at most vitamin stores.
Also there Kava-Kava which is an anti anxiety herb it helps with calming the stresses of life.
It helps when one can to use herbs instead of the harsh medicines today. I can understand your stresses esp when associated with BPD I’m presently struggling and using some DBT skills to help me.
I hope the new psychologist can assist you.

Thank you for your reply! I will definitely try natural drugs like Milk Thistle and Kava-Kava! I will go buy them first thing tomorrow morning. Thank you so much for those suggestions.

I don't go to DBT Maybe I could start a new thread asking about what you guys learned there?

[jeremiahgirl]

Sounds like a nice thread , go for it!

[LustStarrr]

Originally Posted by megmeg9

Oh no, I've never heard of it. I have been doing cognitive-bihevioral therapy (CBT) for three years now but it never really helped me. Thank you so much for your reply, I will ask my therapist about DBT

CBT was actually detrimental for me, & many other people who have been diagnosed with BPD have said the same was true for them too or that, like you, they just didn't benefit from it. DBT - Dialectical Behaviour Therapy - is CBT mixed with Zen. It's a far more compassionate approach, & I've found it hugely beneficial... I hope you're able to access it in your area, & within your budget.

[cygne]

I'm rooting for you.

The suicidal feelings are the worst, and the psychotherapists are doing an awful job at being empathetic towards people with our condition because we're "tough to work with".

Do get into journaling, write down your feelings, track your mood swings, and everything else; thoughts, people you come into contact with, times you eat, and so on. You'll eventually find triggers and establish connections. You need to see the warning signs.

It's true that some states can be aggravated by changes in weather or an imbalance in diet (make sure your vitamins and minerals are in-check).

The boyfriend deal, I'm not gonna lie, don't take it to heart. Always ask yourself whether you want to commit or not, and if you see yourself with this person in the years to come. If your answer is negative, then don't waste your energy, you've got enough to work on already.

Let me know how you're feeling and I'm here if you need anyone to chat with. Just hit me up with a DM.