[omgmeve]

I met a great guy at work. We hit it off instantly. He told me he thought I was cute and that he was interested in taking me out soon. He ended up inviting me over to his place to watch movies and we hooked up. I refused to sleep with him on the first date and I get a nagging feeling that it bothered him. He said I wasn't being fair and other hurtful things. I don't feel like I owed him anything. It weirded me out because he was such a sweet guy and really doesn't seem like that kind of guy... He said he wanted something serious with me and whatnot.

The next day, he kissed me at work which confused me even more because if all he wanted was sex, he wouldn't publicly kiss me. He's been ignoring my messages for the past few days as well. He said he didn't want to hang out this weekend because he's not working and he doesn't want to get out of the house. I feel really hurt and I want to delete/block him off Facebook and never speak to him again. I know it's irrational but I feel so hurt and I want to protect my heart. I really want to just tell him he's not right for me because he disrespected me but I think it's too dramatic. My friends had met him and kept saying I'd found a great guy, that I'd found the right one this time (they're really not ones to sugarcoat things, I actually believed them)

I was so upset over his behaviour that I ended up slashing my thighs really bad which, in retrospect, was a terrible idea because it's summer and now I'm stuck wearing pants and not going swimming for a while.

[Ithilanar]

Gotta say, I don't agree with your friends. He doesn't sound all that great pushing you to try and have sex with you - on the first day. The hell? You really did NOT owe him anything. If he really wants something serious with you he can wait and he will respect your wishes to take it slowly.

I don't think he sounds like good news and if I was you I'd stay clear of him. It sounds like he would put you through a horrible emotional roller coaster if you engaged with him. Your friends probably think he's great because they haven't seen or noticed the things you just told about him.

I am sorry you felt you had to hurt yourself over him. I think you should listen to yourself and your intuition and protect your heart.

This doesn't sound like the kind of guy that's going to respect you, and in my opinion you should get out of it as soon as you can. Go on and tell him, it wouldn't be too dramatic. You owe him nothing.

Yeah, a guy that pressures you for sex on a first date, and doesn't respect a "no" is not someone that will respect your choices later on in a relationship. I would never do that to a girl on a first date. Sex wouldn't be on my mind. I would want to get to know the girl better. Respect is a really important aspect in a relationship for me, and I give the same respect back.

tbh I'd think twice about how great this guy is. First off, charisma and charm don't make a great guy. ON the surface any guy can seem nice and charming and fun.. etc. but his motives will show quickly after the first date. Fact is, I am in no way thinking I'm a great guy but God forbid I'd EVER have sex with someone after the first date!!! I mean really wtf? Sex is something saved for someone you really care for deeply and are serious with IMO. I'm sorry I'm old fashioned but this casual sex stuff doesn't sit well with me and that's what it really comes down to.

Tell you what, if this guy is as great as you think? He'll respect your wishes and not think it's unfair and all that bullsht. He'll wait for you and get to knwo you and go slow. Any guy in his right mind that has any maturity beyond the adolescent will know this.

You don't ever owe a man sex. Period. I don't care if he farking bought you the state of texas, you don't owe a man sex. You're right on that one. I despise men that think if they take a woman on a great date and treat her wonderful, give her things...etc they are owed sex. makes me want to punch them right in the _____s Seriously.