I've just created a 'drama' at nothing. Apparently. And yeah maybe it is nothing, but it is something to me!! And I just get laughed at and told I'm being childish. Maybe if you had spent your life feeling ignored you'd get it!!

Originally Posted by secretwhisper

I've just created a 'drama' at nothing. Apparently. And yeah maybe it is nothing, but it is something to me!! And I just get laughed at and told I'm being childish. Maybe if you had spent your life feeling ignored you'd get it!!

Drama wouldn't be "drama" if it was about something that is, if the event is in proportion to the reaction it's not drama anymore so don't feel bad about that.

It is never "nothing" though. If it has affected you and has made you panic, fear or otherwise feel out of control, it's real to you. That's not to say that your reaction was in proportion to what happened and that's just something we do. it's not that it's wrong to be angry, sad, anxious or any of those things, it's that our overly emotional selves tend to do this to the extreme.

Accept that they aren't going to understand this because their emotions aren't as vivid and intense as ours are. Try to, when you're able to calm down, think about it from outside yourself and look at it in an unbiased view if you can and maybe you'll understand how, if you did, you over reacted. Then just let it go

[GeorgiaGirl413]

Oh man, I don't even need to know the details. I sooo get where you are. I have been there many times. We are unique individuals and very few of the "normal" folks out there get us. Consider yourself hugged and understood.

Originally Posted by s4ndm4n2006

Drama wouldn't be "drama" if it was about something that is, if the event is in proportion to the reaction it's not drama anymore so don't feel bad about that.

It is never "nothing" though. If it has affected you and has made you panic, fear or otherwise feel out of control, it's real to you. That's not to say that your reaction was in proportion to what happened and that's just something we do. it's not that it's wrong to be angry, sad, anxious or any of those things, it's that our overly emotional selves tend to do this to the extreme.

Accept that they aren't going to understand this because their emotions aren't as vivid and intense as ours are. Try to, when you're able to calm down, think about it from outside yourself and look at it in an unbiased view if you can and maybe you'll understand how, if you did, you over reacted. Then just let it go

Thanks I think I need to calm down some before I can even consider doing that but you make sense and also make me feel less stupid and pathetic!!

Originally Posted by GeorgiaGirl413

Oh man, I don't even need to know the details. I sooo get where you are. I have been there many times. We are unique individuals and very few of the "normal" folks out there get us. Consider yourself hugged and understood.

Thanks sucks that they just don't get it or respect that you're gonna react differently. Even when they know your issues.

Thanks for the understanding back to you!

[GeorgiaGirl413]

What S4 referred to as looking at the situation "from outside yourself" I call looking at the situation with your "true self". I am attaching a link to an article that I would like you to read. It has really changed things for me. I have begun to learn to talk to my "parts" and it is making all the difference.
http://http://www.psychotherapynetwo...derline-client

Originally Posted by secretwhisper

Thanks I think I need to calm down some before I can even consider doing that but you make sense and also make me feel less stupid and pathetic!!

Oh hun you are far from pathetic *hugs* not stupid at all. stupidity refers to your level of intelligence which I do not see you lacking at all. your issues are to do with emotional dysregulation which you just need to learn to control and You will..

It sounds interesting, but annoyingly I can't get it to load!! I might try again later, don't get why it's not working

Originally Posted by secretwhisper

Thanks sucks that they just don't get it or respect that you're gonna react differently. Even when they know your issues.

Thanks for the understanding back to you!

They know them "logically" not in their hearts. Inside they are like "I don't understand how anyone can get this upset about anything." It's a relational problem and an empathy problem. they probably make no effort to really understand what's going on in you.

Originally Posted by s4ndm4n2006

Oh hun you are far from pathetic *hugs* not stupid at all. stupidity refers to your level of intelligence which I do not see you lacking at all. your issues are to do with emotional dysregulation which you just need to learn to control and You will..

Thank you you must be right, I'm not stupid because I can understand those long words!!

Originally Posted by secretwhisper

Thank you you must be right, I'm not stupid because I can understand those long words!!

hehe yeah I know right?

Originally Posted by s4ndm4n2006

They know them "logically" not in their hearts. Inside they are like "I don't understand how anyone can get this upset about anything." It's a relational problem and an empathy problem. they probably make no effort to really understand what's going on in you.

I guess that makes it worse in a way though. The fact that they're not even trying to understand...

People suck sometimes!

Originally Posted by secretwhisper

I guess that makes it worse in a way though. The fact that they're not even trying to understand...

People suck sometimes!

Many people do, indeed suck. Especially when they are drinking a milkshake but that's another subject XD but seriously I know the feeling. You just have to be extra picky about who you let get too close. A few really good close friends is far better than a large group of fair weather acquaintences.

Hehe there is no other way to drink a milkshake!

Unfortunately this is my boyfriend who I live with, and have been with since 2007. I know I make thngs difficult but sometimes it is like you say, doesn't even make an effort to understand.

Originally Posted by secretwhisper

Hehe there is no other way to drink a milkshake!

Unfortunately this is my boyfriend who I live with, and have been with since 2007. I know I make thngs difficult but sometimes it is like you say, doesn't even make an effort to understand.

he has the responsibility to do so. i mean as a significant other you should always try to know the other person well and be the one person they can always rely on for comfort and understanding. that's just a part of the deal.

I know. He does try I guess, I don't think I give him enough credit as I have put him through a lot of s**t the last year and a half. It doesn't help as well that he works nights so he is tired and grumpy too. I know he cares, he just doesn't see things the way I do!

Originally Posted by secretwhisper

I know. He does try I guess, I don't think I give him enough credit as I have put him through a lot of s**t the last year and a half. It doesn't help as well that he works nights so he is tired and grumpy too. I know he cares, he just doesn't see things the way I do!

Well he can't be all bad, you're still with him

but try not to see it as if you put him through "sht" I mean... if you're like me, you take on way more blame for relationships than necessary and most times the other person is fine with letting you. Even the best of people would tend to let the other person take the blame if they aren't called on it.

Life is tiring. Everyone gets tired, and while I understand that might be the case, if it's always his excuse for grumpiness he does need to man up in this area and just bite the bullet to be nicer

Thanks why are you so wise??

Originally Posted by secretwhisper

Thanks why are you so wise??

because I am the S4.

But seriously? I'm not! God I am so not wise.. wise-acre maybe XP

[GeorgiaGirl413]

Secret, I can't get it to load from my post either. Just google "Depathologizing the Borderline Client". You'll get the article first thing. It was published in Psyhology Networker. Easier that way.

Originally Posted by GeorgiaGirl413

Secret, I can't get it to load from my post either. Just google "Depathologizing the Borderline Client". You'll get the article first thing. It was published in Psyhology Networker. Easier that way.

is psyhology a new science?

AND THERE'S THE WISEACRE!

[GeorgiaGirl413]

Originally Posted by s4ndm4n2006

because I am the S4.

But seriously? I'm not! God I am so not wise.. wise-acre maybe XP

I think that a lot of us DO have wisdom to share here. Now, if we could just listen to our own wisdom when we are in the middle of it we would all be sooo much better.

Originally Posted by s4ndm4n2006

because I am the S4.

But seriously? I'm not! God I am so not wise.. wise-acre maybe XP

Originally Posted by s4ndm4n2006

is psyhology a new science?

AND THERE'S THE WISEACRE!

You are silly!

Originally Posted by GeorgiaGirl413

Secret, I can't get it to load from my post either. Just google "Depathologizing the Borderline Client". You'll get the article first thing. It was published in Psyhology Networker. Easier that way.

Thanks I'll take a look now

Originally Posted by secretwhisper

You are silly!

wut? I was being very serious