[jean17]

You know, I just feel like my whole life has been and is a failure. The only thing that I was able to do was to keep my job. I know that's a big thing, but mostly I merged my entire being to my job and was not going to let go. So, I stuck it out for 25 years or so getting drug down further and further into despair, depression and anxiety. When I look back I really don't know how I did it. Now I can just barely cope with being with people for long enough to get through Mass. Then I come home a nervous wreck. But I have failed at relationships, family, my religious beliefs, my morals. And now I'm so tired, so exhausted. My favourite thing is getting into bed - alone. I don't ever want to get into another relationship. I just want to live the rest of my life alone. I'm safer that way.

[Tristan H.]

Well, if you can live alone, then maybe you can have a fine life that way. Many people live happy and content lives on their own out of choice, it's just difficult to do so in society because it is unpredictable and puts demands on us. I firmly believe that most Borderlines would have little to no symptoms of their mental illness if they lived as hermits in nature à la D ick Proenneke, with nothing to worry about more complex than the rhythm of nature, tending to one's crops and home and observing the wildlife and geography around oneself.

[LaborIntensive]

Originally Posted by Tristan H.

Well, if you can live alone, then maybe you can have a fine life that way. Many people live happy and content lives on their own out of choice, it's just difficult to do so in society because it is unpredictable and puts demands on us. I firmly believe that most Borderlines would have little to no symptoms of their mental illness if they lived as hermits in nature à la D ick Proenneke, with nothing to worry about more complex than the rhythm of nature, tending to one's crops and home and observing the wildlife and geography around oneself.

I have not been officially diagnosed yet but this is how I feel as well. As a youth I wanted to be int he city and as time passed it was about finding better jobs and my friends. Now days in my ;ate 30's early 40's I find that I want to be alone and enjoy the time to myself and I daydream of being next to a stream or in a mountain top cabin just puffing on my pipe and staring off into the distance.