[SeekerOfLife]

Saw my T. yesterday. During our visit she casually said she thought I might have Borderline Personality Disorder. She recommended I try to get a book called The Buddha and The Borderline. I did a little research on B.P.D. and I do not think I have it. One thing that stood out to me was the doing impulsively dangerous things. I may be impulsive, but I rarely do dangerous things. Maybe two times in my life I have done something dangerous.
The funny thing is she mentioned it casually, like a gentle suggestion. Maybe she is saying, yes, she believes I have it. Or maybe she is saying for me to look inside my own head and see what I think. Any suggestions? Is there a questionnaire or test for this?

[ImNotHere]

Borderline Personality Disorder Diagnosis: DSM IV Diagnostic Criteria

A pervasive pattern of instability of interpersonal relationships, self image and affects, and marked impulsivity beginning by early adulthood ** and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by five (or more) of the following:
1) Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment.
Note: Do not include suicidal or self-mutilating behavior*** covered in Criterion 5.
2) A pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized by alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation.
3) Identity disturbance: markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of self.
4) Impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging (e.g., spending, sex, substance abuse, reckless driving, binge eating).
Note: Do not include suicidal or self-mutilating behavior*** covered in Criterion 5.
5) Recurrent suicidal behavior, gestures, or threats, or self-mutilating behavior***.
6) Affective [mood] instability.
7) Chronic feelings of emptiness.
8) Inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger (e.g., frequent displays of

temper, constant anger, recurrent physical fights).
9) Transient, stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms.

You need 5 out of 9 to be considered BPD. But it really varies from person to person and usually BPD does not stand alone, you may have other disorders, depression, anxiety etc with it.

[misfit77]

I am in the process of figuring out if I have it or not. I don't do dangerous things because I am so afraid of dying. I do tend to be impulsive though. I don't think it's as black and white as just being reckless. I think there's more to all of it.

[atomicc]

You could possess borderline traits but not have a diagnosis of borderline personality disorder. I don't think it's the label that matters, it's how you feel about your issues and the therapy or treatment that works best so you can live a happier healthier life.

[SeekerOfLife]

Still pondering this pending diagnosis. I have studied about it as much as I have time for. I do not agree that I have it. Why did T. even suggest that I may have it. This is causing me much anxiety. Before last week, I saw myself as a person with depression, and a person with anxiety. OK. Now, if I have this thing called borderline personality disorder, I see myself as defective, like unfix-able. About hopeless. I will see T. in about two weeks. Anyone have suggestions on what questions I should ask to know why she thinks this.

[winter4me]

You are not what your t. labels you. (tho' I admit, I often think more ptsd when someone suggests bpd to someone who does not meet the criteria for bpd...) YOU can sit down, list your "symptoms"/behaviors, and you will know what you need to address; there are tools used in the tx of bpd that are useful to all (eg: some of the DBT exercises, CBT techniques, ...) but, you are the one who ultimately decides what description "fits". It may or may not be the one you first choose, or the one your t. chooses...
Do not panic. You are wise, strong, and smart. Don't forget it.

[Frankbtl]

Hi seekersinking, IF you have borderline personality disorder you're NOT "defective" so don't let it worry you!! It may just mean that you need some different management skills/coping resources/support to address the things you're feeling/doing/thinking.
But I'd say that your therapist isn't right now actually diagnosing you with that anyway. Sometimes finding the right diagnosis/ways to help can just take a little exploration, and thinking about and ruling out or possibly in different things, and that's good. It can be trial and error.
And she's clearly trusting your judgement and insight to help her to help you the best way she possibly can.
Sometimes people can have symptoms of different things without even really realizing those symptoms/seeing them in themselves, so a bit of objective reflection can help in them identifying those things.
So maybe first of all have a think about the symptoms with an open mind (remember the diagnosis doesn't make you "defective") and then maybe work with your therapist on your thoughts and her thoughts relating to whether or not there's any room for potential or not.
It can take time for you both to come to conclusions you can agree with, but don't worry about that, it sounds like you have a very good overall relationship with her. Just stay open with her and it's just good that she hasn't stuck diagnosis's on you from day one without even getting to know you, and that she's taking her time to see any possibilities, and involving you.
Best wishes
Alison

[worthit]

My pdoc suggested I am BPD as well. After a diagnosis from another psychiatrist of schizo affective disorder bipolar type. So it's very confusing and I've read a lot about it. I don't agree with a lot .I don't tend to do dangerous things because I'm too frightened. But a lot of the other things are alike. So I'm not sure whether I should argue with him or accept my new diagnosis.

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[avlady]

No you are not defective, just need help with coping. There is nothing wrong with having issues, you just need to address them. I am also so scared of dying, i don't know if this is a borderline personality symptom so i also ask if others think about dying alot too. I have lost alot of people through death but just can't handle it anyway still. Any suggestions?

[SeekerOfLife]

Misfit and avlady mentioned being afraid of dying. I have faced death before, and I am not afraid of it. I know God spared my life. I am not saying I desire to die. I think facing life is often harder than facing death. I am still here, and trying to stay on my road of recovery.

[River11]

Originally Posted by seekersinking

I think facing life is often harder than facing death. I am still here, and trying to stay on my road of recovery.

With you there, seekersinking!

(And there are some "quizzes" for various disorders etc on this site - via the bar at the very top).

Give yourself time and breathing space ...

[SeekerOfLife]

Thanks to all of you for your support and encouragement. I will be making a list of things to discuss with T. You all have brought warmth and comfort to my sad heart.

[SeekerOfLife]

Originally Posted by River11

With you there, seekersinking!

(And there are some "quizzes" for various disorders etc on this site - via the bar at the very top).

Give yourself time and breathing space ...

I just took the Borderline Personality quiz, and I scored a 9. I just do not think I have this, but as someone pointed out, I may have some of the traits. (Here I come, T, with my notebook and questions! )

[worthit]

Can you give the site you took the quiz? My old pdoc says Schizoaffective and the new one says BPD.

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[SeekerOfLife]

Originally Posted by worthit

Can you give the site you took the quiz? My old pdoc says Schizoaffective and the new one says BPD.


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At the top of the PC page it says quizzes. Click on it. When the next page comes up, scroll down to almost the bottom of the page. You will find it there.

On the PC home page, there is an article on borderline. It sounds so different from what I have read so far. I guess I am back to square one. Just don't know if I have it. (Here I come with my questions, T!)

[SeekerOfLife]

Well, since I originally posted this, T has not brought it up. I read the book she told me about (Buddha and the Borderline). After carefully, reading the book, and doing a lot of self reflection, I concluded I do not have BPD.
So yesterday, I brought it up with her. She admitted that she had not officially diagnosed me with it. She said something like, it was a diagnosis to be ruled out, i.e. she did not want to put it down as a diagnosis until she was sure. We did not discuss it at length. I told her a little of what I had learned, and that I may possess some of the traits but I do not believe I have BPD. And, yes, she agreed with me.
It was an interesting study for me. I know there are individuals here who struggle with this disorder. It was an eye opener for me to learn about life through the eyes of someone with BPD.

[worthit]

Interesting. My pdoc says I'm very BPD but my T says Schizoaffective like my previous pdoc. I also have traits of BPD but think Schizoaffective fits me perfectly. Good luck.

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