A metaphor for BPD that angers people. Why ???

I'm also a member of another similar forum, in which I recently posted a (controversial) thread that almost every reader misunderstood and completely missed the point of. I was ostracized as a result. Maybe you guys can help me explain why ? Your opinion would be greatly appreciated.

In that thread, I used demonic possession as a metaphor to describe MY, and I very strongly emphasize, MY, experience of BPD. I was NOT, in any way, implying that BPD (in general) equates to being a demon or possessed or anything like that. All I did, in my opinion, was liken or compare the experience of the symptoms of BPD to what demonic possession might feel like. Also, please note that I have been greatly influenced by the true story of the German girl Anneliese Michel (upon which several movies have been based- Requiem, The Exorcism of Emily Rose, etc).

Here are the specific symptoms I used for my comparison:

- When I'm around people (nons), they can instinctively sense that I'm different. I'm possessed, they're not. All animals on this Earth, as far as I know, have been taught by God to sense danger. To most strangers I come across, I AM danger.
- The demon makes me do things I don't want to do (talk back to my boss , emotional outbursts, road rage driving that can potentially hurt other people, pushing people away)
- The demon won't let me do things I want to do (go up to someone and say hi, ask someone out, leave my house, get out of my bed)
- I try to exorcize myself of the demon by hurting myself (self-harm)
- The internal pain caused by the demon comes out in many forms (e.g. tears)

Makes sense to me. Don't know why they didn't like the metaphor, maybe they felt criticized or insulted or aren't smart enough to see the similarity

I think that's a good metaphor. The other people were probably too stupid or closed-minded to get it.

Buncha idiots IMO!
I like your metaphor and even though I haven't given it as much thought as you clearly have, I've said the same about my BPD symptoms in the past. After reading your post I'm even more convinced I was right.

What you've written makes sense and CAN'T be offensive because its ABOUT YOU.
So those people are the ones with the problem, not you or your metaphors.

If it was a metaphor, I don't see what the big deal is.

Thanks so much for your responses, guys ! I'm having much better luck with this topic here than on the other forum !

It's only my second day here, and I'm already liking this forum

Any person with any smudge of intelligence would have immediately recognized that it was a metaphor, that it was only about me, that I was simply asking if anyone else felt that way, and that I was not trying to impose my beliefs on anyone.

What was the Other forum if I may ask?

Psychology and Mental Health Forum - Psych forums. I've been on there for about a year.

Who knows why people react the way they do. I've been involved with a group of skeptics lately, and have been talking about the Meyers-Briggs personality types.. they way they act, you'd think I was talking about some kind of witchcraft. I'm not even really into it that much... I barely understand the basics.. but, I like to get on a message board devoted to the INTJ personality type.

Anyway, it was a strange reaction that left me feeling awkward, for no good reason that I can determine.

And I'm afraid they might give me a hard time the next time I'm around the group.

(If it's ok to ask) What got you into this group ? Do you identify with the INTJ type ?

I just looked up the INTJ personality type, and whatever I read was pretty interesting. This whole Meyers-Briggs stuff, in general, sounds fascinating, from what I've heard about it. Now that you mention it, I need to look more into it.

Most people in my daily life belong to the ASHL type, if you know what I mean

Unless you worded it horrifically and implied all people with BPD are possessed by demons then it's them with the problem not you! Sometimes people online LIKE to read into things the wrong way and argue about it.

Also I suppose people with BPD can have a tendency to take things the wrong way and see criticism when it isn't there, but the other side of the story is that we are also very good at wording things so that others don't take it the wrong way - reading your post which is very well explained I can't imagine you worded it badly I should think they read into it what they wanted to.

I once wrote a post the day I received my diagnosis, i was very upset and basically asked if I was a bad person or bpd? People took that as me saying all people With bpd were bad people. But from my point of view I was dx'd with bipolar then I told my pdoc that i hated myself because I always do bad things then proceeded to tell her every bad thing I had ever done.. She then changed my diagnosis to bpd. Only now with hindsight do I realise I got that diagnosis because of the REASONS for doing those things and the effects they had on me, rather than the specific things I did... I see why people took it the wrong way but I also wished people had taken the time to try and ask me why I had said that and found out more.

In relation to the demon topic, I don't feel there is a conscious demon possessing me and making me do thing, i more feel that I have a demonic force within myself that can sometimes effect my thinking.
I kind of always have the thoughts 'i am bad, what I do is bad and what I think is bad.' even thought I know I have good inside me and I am more good than bad, i know I have this bad within me and that is strong and feels overpowering of the good... So therefore I feel like the bad is the demon. I've never spoken about this so think I am not explaining well.

Good post

Hi, you made some very good points, like the one about how borderlines tend to (mis)interpret online posts.

But, I really liked how you worded the last paragraph of your response ! Especially the words "i know I have this bad within me and that is strong and feels overpowering of the good... So therefore I feel like the bad is the demon". They really resonated with me.

Nice to meet you, thanks for your response, and I'm glad you liked the post !

I just stumbled on the Meyers Brigss information somehow. And I liked what I read. The INTJ personality type describes me fairly well, and there is info out there to help you make the best of your personality type, whatever that may be. Anyway, the info suggests we INTJ's are rare and often misunderstood. I find that to be true so, I like to hang out with other INTJ's in the forum..... I've been there over a year, and have gotten to know some cool people. It's one of the few places where I can go and really feel like I am accepted for who I am.

Ah ok. Borderline describes me perfectly, so I'm a borderline for life

See, labels are tricky for me. I have a problem with the entire concept of mental illnesses and personality disorders, in that, they are treated like diseases. Who ever heard of a benefit from some disease? The same is true of a mental health diagnosis. Tell me the positive aspects of any mental health disorder.... There aren't any.

On the other hand, if I label myself by my personality type, I admit there ARE benefits, as well drawbacks... And there is much written on how to make your personality type work to your advantage.

I defy you to show me any information that tells people how to make their mental health diagnosis work to their advantage.

I'm an INTJ with some BPD and NPD traits.

It's because you have to have BPD to understand the metaphor, and to experience the little demon inside you making you do crazy things whilst you watch on seemingly powerless to stop it.

The important thing to remember is that the little demon isn't a demon at all. It's simply our thoughts and emotions overloading us, and we are actually in control of that. We're in control, therefore, of getting the demon back in the box, and eventually, never letting him out in the first place.

Hard to do. But it is possible with help.

NOTE - If I misunderstood you, correct me, by all means. It sounds like you don't want to identify with BPD because of stigma attached to it by society.

My identification with BPD derives from the most accurate way I can describe my symptoms. If the whole world has a problem with the word "borderline", that's not my flippin problem, it's theirs

I'd proudly wear a T-shirt that says "Watch out for the borderline wearing this shirt".

Don't let stigma that nons attach to our condition affect your view of yourself. Or go ahead and do so. I won't.

I did post my thread on a BPD forum, so I'd imagine that readers were mostly borderlines, if not all

My problem with identifying BPD is that it has, almost by definition, a negative connotation. For me, telling people I have a BPD, would be along the lines of telling them I'm a moron. A moron has an IQ of 50-69. Now, no one decides their IQ, so it's nothing to be ashamed of, right? But, do you really want to go around telling people you're deficient in that way? Would you even want to think of yourself in those terms? Would you label yourself as a moron? I know I wouldn't..

But, perhaps you have a point. Maybe if enough people come forward, that stigma would change.... and, I do enjoy learning that there successful people with BPD.

But, just as I don't see perceptions about IQ and intelligence changing anytime soon, I also don't see perceptions about mental health issues changing anytime soon.

Another thing to think about... what if you start getting better? What if your symptoms subside, and some traits start disappearing? Are you still someone with BPD? Think about what you're saying when you label yourself. You're saying that you have these traits. If you're saying you are BPD and BPD has these traits... then, what is your motivation to change? If the traits subside, are you still BPD?

I guess the bottom line is that I have to ask myself.. can I really have hope and get better by labeling myself? I have to answer "no". It's enough for me to admit I have some BPD (as well as NPD, and perhaps PTSD) traits. It is not an easy task to fit humans into specific categories or diagnoses... life is messy. And to label myself by the traits I show, is in my eyes (at least for me), counterproductive.

I don't think it's fair to insult their intelligence. They were probably just offended by it or misunderstood it. People can get offended by things even if that wasn't your intention. Anyway, I think it's a good way to describe it. I've often felt like - metaphorically - there's a demon inside me controlling me.

whatever you call it , it is a reminder that you are a person with bpd not a bpd person !

You're right. I was probably still mad at those guys for ostracizing me, when I spoke poorly of their intelligence. In all fairness, I've reacted purely emotionally plenty of times (of course I did, I'm a borderline !). They did, too.