[dinorap1]

I am hardly in any position to be able to get help. I know I fit most of the descriptions for the BPD disorder, or at least the feelings of emptiness, fear of abandonment, horrible self-image, etc...
... and I really want to improve! I want to be able to set goals and stuff like that, but usually, I'm too caught up in my hole of self-pity to do anything. I know I'm capable of great things. I just don't know where to start.

I go to public school every day, and personally I think it's torture... I absolutely hate sitting around for so long and doing nothing. I have very restricrive parents that do not realize how badly my mental state is, and wouldn't do anything about it anyway... I personally abandoned all of my friends for fear that they didn't value me... so I feel very stuck.

Ughhh... what should I do?

[Crazy Hitch]

Hi dinorap,

Thank you for sharing this with us.

Yes, I can understand your thinking.

I would like to respond to your question:

"What should I do"

I will list some options here that possibly you can think about.

Do you have a school counselor?

Perhaps your school counselor may be able to help you.

Do you have a family doctor?

Maybe you can see your family doctor to discuss your concerns?

I have noticed your update underneath your profile picture there: "suicide seems so worth it right now". I tend to notice small details and I see that you are from Nevada.

Please have a look at this list.

Perhaps this may be one of your options to ring on of these numbers.

Common Hotline Phone Numbers | Psych Central

Here is another option for you.

I see that you have your Mood Status as set as Depressed.

Have you considered a post in the Depression forum about your life circumstances?

This might be an option for you?

Members in the Depression Forum might be able to give you some input.

I shall place some information below for you here.

DEPRESSION FORUM

Depression - Forums at Psych Central

Once you have made 5 posts on Psych Central you will be able to join us for weekly scheduled chats.

Check the calendar to see which chats are scheduled:

Forums at Psych Central - Calendar

DEPRESSION SUPPORT CHAT - TIMES ARE EST

This event occurs every 1 week(s) on Thursday
01-01-15 to 28-08-17
09:00 PM to 10:00 PM
Peer-led support group:

Depression Support Chat
Led by Krminnj

Please keep an eye out for Weekly Chat Announcements:

Chat Announcements - Forums at Psych Central

[dinorap1]

Originally Posted by Hooligan

Hi dinorap,

Thank you for sharing this with us.

Yes, I can understand your thinking.

I would like to respond to your question:

"What should I do"

I will list some options here that possibly you can think about.

Do you have a school counselor?

Perhaps your school counselor may be able to help you.

Do you have a family doctor?

Maybe you can see your family doctor to discuss your concerns?

I have noticed your update underneath your profile picture there: "suicide seems so worth it right now". I tend to notice small details and I see that you are from Nevada.

Please have a look at this list.

Perhaps this may be one of your options to ring on of these numbers.

Here is another option for you.

I see that you have your Mood Status as set as Depressed.

Have you considered a post in the Depression forum about your life circumstances?

This might be an option for you?

Members in the Depression Forum might be able to give you some input.

I shall place some information below for you here.

DEPRESSION FORUM

Once you have made 5 posts on Psych Central you will be able to join us for weekly scheduled chats.

Check the calendar to see which chats are scheduled:

DEPRESSION SUPPORT CHAT - TIMES ARE EST

This event occurs every 1 week(s) on Thursday
01-01-15 to 28-08-17
09:00 PM to 10:00 PM
Peer-led support group:

Depression Support Chat
Led by Krminnj

Please keep an eye out for Weekly Chat Announcements

Thanks for replying! Don't worry, I hardly have the resources to reliably try to kill myself. I won't try it unless it's guaranteed death.

I've been thinking about talking to a counselor... but last time I did that, they scammed my parents by sending me to an expensive place that was supposed to help me, but in fact did nothing at all... they're all in it for the money, anyway. I never had a good therapist or counselor.

I think the key for me to get better is to just get a hobby I really enjoy and build up self-esteem. But right now I'm in a rut again, and hardly trust myself to do anything. :/