[loveyouhun]

My name is Christa and I was diagnosis with BPD. I took Dialectical Behavior therapy and had a wonderful therapist and support group. I graduated in 2000.
I'm having problems with my Mom and friends. My two neighbors are constantly asking for things like rides, foil, money and rides. I've been putting my feet down and saying "no." Sometime I do give in. But I find it's hard to say 'no" because I don't want to lose friends. My Mom on the other hands constantly looking for me and make comments I don't hear very well and I don't get what she is saying. She get nasty with me. My Mom live 3.500 miles away and I'm planning to move back East as soon as I hear from HUD. I be anywhere from 15-25 min depending where I move (I apply more than one apartment complex.) I do hang up on my Mom if she doesn't do what I ask like changing the subject, or stop asking me what I do with my money, etc. I don't know what to do anymore. I love her and she is sick and dying (lung cancer) and sometime I repeatedly go over what she does to my in my head. I suppose to see the new therapist today but I had to cancel because I'm financially strapped (no money). My mom get angry when I asked her for money. I'm lost

[Pierro]

Originally Posted by loveyouhun

My name is Christa and I was diagnosis with BPD. I took Dialectical Behavior therapy and had a wonderful therapist and support group. I graduated in 2000.
I'm having problems with my Mom and friends. My two neighbors are constantly asking for things like rides, foil, money and rides. I've been putting my feet down and saying "no." Sometime I do give in. But I find it's hard to say 'no" because I don't want to lose friends. My Mom on the other hands constantly looking for me and make comments I don't hear very well and I don't get what she is saying. She get nasty with me. My Mom live 3.500 miles away and I'm planning to move back East as soon as I hear from HUD. I be anywhere from 15-25 min depending where I move (I apply more than one apartment complex.) I do hang up on my Mom if she doesn't do what I ask like changing the subject, or stop asking me what I do with my money, etc. I don't know what to do anymore. I love her and she is sick and dying (lung cancer) and sometime I repeatedly go over what she does to my in my head. I suppose to see the new therapist today but I had to cancel because I'm financially strapped (no money). My mom get angry when I asked her for money. I'm lost

Hey, why are you giving these people money when you dont have any for yourself? They are not really friends if they just ask you for money...Parents can be a tricky one... your mom just has your best interests at heart, you know. I know you love her very much.. and she loves you. Don't spend your time fighting on the phone.. I know it is difficult, but you only have one mom. Best wishes

[loveyouhun]

Pierro,
Yes I know I don't give anyone one money at all. One neighbor I had to take her to court and the Judge said "that we leave each other alone and she come down once in while and ask me for things like foil, cigarette, ride, bus pass. I tell her "no, I don't have them."
For my Mom I trying not to call her daily. She is sick and dying with lung cancer stage 3. What am I suppose to do? My family hardly see her and she does need help between lung cancer and asthma. Any suggestions is appreciated.

loveyouhun