Need some help here

I feel perfectly good and normal bt sometimes i am agitated,i get angry at small small matters,scream,yell at everyone especially at my mom,i just can cry for more than hours.bt after certain time when m fully aware (especially after sheding litres of tears ) m just ashamed of my deeds,i get realized that it was all unnecessary and i overreacted.
Bt this isnt the case now.i feel like i am loosing control over me day day.i get irrirated more often.any reminder of past most irritates me and it will spoil my moods for hours.i break stuffs in my anger.i hab no concertration at any thing. I am failing my exams and tests and i dont feel bad about it.my financial conditions are degrading day by day.i just feel alone in this .i am an introvert person and homebody too and i hab less friends.and my friends are not that patient kind s.they just don hab time for all my emotional melodramas.their recent acts just made me loose all my trust over them.
I so alone ,isolated,lost in my own prob.i hav wasted so many times with my disorders

I am sorry you are feeling so alone. Is there anyone that you can talk to at your school about how you feel.. Please keep posting.

I'm sorry you're dealing with all of that. Do you see a therapist? If your friends and family can't be there for a you, a therapist might be a good support and listening ear.

DD

Thanks but the main problem is i have no one in my life with whom i can talk about these matters.i don want my parents to get worry neither i have all the money in the world to pay for a therapist or any medication!

Sometimes i feel i am alright and relieved such that i havent got any extraordinary sides of me but sometimes all pain attackts and tortures me at once and it becomes so unbearable.

It's understandable that you don't want to worry your parents. Having to deal with pain that attacks and tortures you so much that it is unbearable is more than anyone should have to deal with! Although friends can be helpful to listen, it sound to me like it would be better to talk to a professional. I am not sure how it works in your country, if you are not able to see a counselor then perhaps you could talk to a teacher, a religious leader, or someone else who has experience helping people.

As a parent I can tell you that good parents worry about their children all the time. There is not a day that I don't worry about my son, not always over the same things but there is always worry.

a professional sounds in order here, maybe you could see a school counselor or free clinic if there are such things where you live. be kind to yourself and don't beat yourself up emotionally you are a good person and it took a lot of courage to post here good luck