[Becoming]

Hey all.

So I've been with in a relationship with a girl I've known for nearly two years. Probably about a month or so ago she broke up with her boyfriend. A few weeks after that we got together. So it's only been less than a week.

My girlfriend is VERY honest and we were good friends before we started dating. She's always telling me how lucky she feels to have me and how happy I make her. She also is very transparent (meaning if I ask her a question she just answer it honestly).

So having a dream that she cheated on me came as a surprise. But it was with her ex boyfriend. So it kind of sucked to see that in my dream. In reality, she hates this guy as he was toxic and a total asshole to her (I saw it and I knew all about it when we were just friends). But because the break-up is fresh, he still contacts her. She's told him not to. She told me she wants him to "leave her the **** alone." She's polite though and simply told him "I don't want to talk."

In all honesty, I'm not sure I have anything to worry about but this dream most certainly sucked!

My girlfriend even told me "I will always be with you unless you tell me otherwise." That scared the **** out of me. Maybe that's part of the dream. I've known her almost two years, so even though the relationship is new, it doesn't seem that a statement like that should scare me so much.

Do you guys think it's fear of abandonment playing out in my dreams? And should I take any action...like telling her about the dream or just keep it to myself?

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[cryingontheinside]

I think it is your own fears and worries and its just a dream. I wouldn't mention the dream to her. Our fears and worries come out in our dreams. Its perfectly natural .

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[Becoming]

Originally Posted by cryingontheinside

I think it is your own fears and worries and its just a dream. I wouldn't mention the dream to her. Our fears and worries come out in our dreams. Its perfectly natural .

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Thanks. I don't think I'm going to. As the day progressed I have felt better about it. I also do not want to cause any unnecessary problems in the relationship.

[Ghost5]

Originally Posted by Becoming

Hey all.

So I've been with in a relationship with a girl I've known for nearly two years. Probably about a month or so ago she broke up with her boyfriend. A few weeks after that we got together. So it's only been less than a week.

My girlfriend is VERY honest and we were good friends before we started dating. She's always telling me how lucky she feels to have me and how happy I make her. She also is very transparent (meaning if I ask her a question she just answer it honestly).

So having a dream that she cheated on me came as a surprise. But it was with her ex boyfriend. So it kind of sucked to see that in my dream. In reality, she hates this guy as he was toxic and a total asshole to her (I saw it and I knew all about it when we were just friends). But because the break-up is fresh, he still contacts her. She's told him not to. She told me she wants him to "leave her the **** alone." She's polite though and simply told him "I don't want to talk."

In all honesty, I'm not sure I have anything to worry about but this dream most certainly sucked!

My girlfriend even told me "I will always be with you unless you tell me otherwise." That scared the **** out of me. Maybe that's part of the dream. I've known her almost two years, so even though the relationship is new, it doesn't seem that a statement like that should scare me so much.

Do you guys think it's fear of abandonment playing out in my dreams? And should I take any action...like telling her about the dream or just keep it to myself?

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Yes, its just your fears coming out in your dreams. I have major trust problems with my wife although she's never given me any reason not to trust her and i struggle with the thoughts and anxiety that she'll meet another guy and leave me when she's even just out with her girlfriends. I get the dreams also, it's just our mental illness I guess.

[doyoutrustme]

i would share it with her, including how sad it made you.

[Katieissweet]

No it signals that she is still involved with her ex at an emotional level,even if she has no contact with him,it was much too early for her to go straight into a relationship.

[Becoming]

Originally Posted by Katieissweet

No it signals that she is still involved with her ex at an emotional level,even if she has no contact with him,it was much too early for her to go straight into a relationship.

I worry about that, but if it's over, it's over. She had no choice but to move on and she wanted to because she's the one that broke up with him.

[Anrea]

Recently I read a theory that everything/everyone in a dream is ourselves. The easy way to look at this might be - you dreamt she cheated on you and it is because you are scared of being abandoned. Another way to look at it is, you are the guy she was with, and you wonder how he feels, you are the girl, and you wonder why you make these choices.

I think this dream isn't because you are having BPD issues. It is just because there have been many changes in a short time and you are trying to understand it from every angle. It sounds like you want this to work out, and know that it is very soon to trust too deeply.

Some questions can only be answered with time. All the talking in the world won't prove as much as time. Relax and enjoy this new relationship. Try to live in the moment.

Life is a journey, not a destination.